


Right as Rain

by TheWrtrInMe



Series: Right as Rain Series [1]
Category: iCarly
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-13
Updated: 2012-03-13
Packaged: 2017-11-01 21:38:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 61,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/361546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWrtrInMe/pseuds/TheWrtrInMe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The kiss was just the beginning...now comes the hard part. Life goes on for Sam and Freddie, but will they go on...together? Begins at iOMG, canon changed from there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Gamechanger

The sky over Seattle was a crisp, clear blue; the bright sun a welcome departure from a week of dense clouds and rain. On a quiet tree lined street stood Ridgeway High School; silence surrounding it in stark contrast to the loud, anxious students behind its doors. Throughout the hallways and in the classrooms students gathered in clusters, staring at wall clocks, watches and cell phones; counting the minutes until the doors released them to the freedom of a beautiful Saturday in Seattle.

Ridgeway's Annual End-of-Year lock-in had been a success. Projects were finished, fun was had and, most importantly, no one had fallen victim to Samantha Puckett or her magic marker of doom.

Well… that's not entirely true. In a darkened corner of the school cafeteria there were three people who had fallen victim to Samantha Puckett – her actions at least, if not to her magic marker. Along the faded tiled wall they sat silently staring at nothing at all, each lost in their thoughts. They were lined up in their typical fashion. Freddie and Sam sat on opposite sides of their common ground, Carly Shay; the glue that held the three-way friendship together. At least that's how it had been, how they thought it was; until tonight. Tonight had been a game changer.

It seemed sudden, but in hindsight the changes had begun a few weeks ago. It was subtle at first. Sam and Freddie seemed to argue a little less. Make no mistake, Sam still found something rude to say to Freddie at almost every turn, but there was a little less sting in her words. She'd actually even complimented him a couple times. And Freddie, who could normally be sent into a fit of rage over Sam's jibes, could sometimes be seen joining her in the laughter.

Carly hadn't really noticed it at first, but last week Sam had asked Freddie and their new iCarly intern, Brad if she could work with them on their end-of-year project. That might not seem strange normally, but this was Sam so there were two things wrong with that scenario. One- Sam didn't do homework; or at least not without having her arm pulled or a side of beef waved in front of her. Two-Sam had been tormenting Freddie for years about his dorky obsession with all things technology related and now she was volunteering -willingly subjecting herself- to hours of Freddie explaining how technology worked. And they'd started talking about things Carly didn't know about; having real conversations complete with inside jokes.

For instance, last week after an iCarly episode Freddie volunteered to go grab them all smoothies from The Groovy Smoothie (even offering to pay for Sam's when she said she had no money; making no comments about her always being broke). It was late and dark so Carly had told him to be careful. To which Sam had said "Stick to the roads, stay clear of the moors!", then she and Freddie had collapsed in laughter, talking about how 'classic' that line was; something to do with a horror movie about werewolves. Carly hated horror movies and quickly changed the subject, but later on she'd thought how strange it was for them to share something that she wasn't involved in.

At the time Carly had just shrugged it off as Sam being unpredictable and Freddie just being nice; grateful that the physical punishments and verbal assaults had tapered off. When she talked to Spencer about it he was just as weirded out as she was, but after a few days he'd laughed and suggested that maybe Freddie and Sam were becoming something of an "item". That was ridiculous though, Carly thought, Freddie had been in love with her almost since he'd been able to spell the word. He was still waiting for her to come around to thinking she wanted to be with him. If her two best friends were an 'item' she'd know about it wouldn't she?

No, none of it made sense. Their behavior was strange, even for them. So when, in the middle of the lock in, Freddie had burst into Carly's classroom to declare that his Mood Face app had registered Sam's mood was "In Love", it had made perfect sense. She'd gone right along with Freddie in assuming that Sam must be in love with Brad. Brad was the only variable not accounted for, the only thing that had visibly changed in their circle.

And why not Brad? He was adorable and so nice. Plus he could cook. That would make Sam's belly happy, and if Sam's belly was happy, Sam was happy. Honestly, if she hadn't been given the new knowledge that her best friend was in love with him, Carly herself might have considered Brad an option. When confronted, Sam had protested – declared ham her one true love and laughed off Carly's theory about Brad.

Even then Carly had been sure, so sure, that Sam was just in denial; unwilling to make a move, scared to be with someone so different from herself. In hindsight she guessed that she hadn't been totally wrong about that. Sam had been scared to make a move, and she'd also been scared to be with someone so different from her. She'd just gotten the guy wrong.

Carly had told Freddie that as Sam's friends it was their responsibility to help her come to terms with these feelings. Or at least get her to admit them. Strangely enough she hadn't had to push him too hard, or at all really. He'd gotten a thoughtful look on his face and said, matter-of-factly, that he was going to find Sam; thinking that maybe a guy's opinion would help her understand why she needed to just step out and act on her feelings. Even with the likelihood of impending violence from Sam, he'd gone to talk to her.

Carly had peeked out at them in the courtyard from behind the blinds in the cafeteria. She'd felt a little bad for spying on them but figured she should be there just in case the talk hadn't gone well. Just in case Sam didn't see Freddie's advice as friendly and tried to break his arm… or his face. From behind the blinds she couldn't really hear what they were saying and Freddie's back was to her so she couldn't even see his expression.

In the beginning Sam's face had been angry, but as she moved from her spot on the concrete slab on the opposite side of the courtyard, she'd looked defeated, then confused. She'd walked up to Freddie with her fist drawn. Carly had reached for the cafeteria door; certain that she'd have to stop some serious bloodshed. But then Sam had dropped her fist to her side and looked at the ground for just a minute before looking back at Freddie. This time the look on her face was different. She'd looked scared… no, she'd looked terrified. Then Sam had done something Carly wouldn't have expected in a million years. She rushed forward, grabbed Freddie by his shoulders… and kissed him!

Carly froze to the spot she was in; mouth wide, jaw dropped. For once, she was completely speechless. She rubbed her eyes, unsure if she was seeing what she thought she was seeing. She heard the cafeteria door slam and Brad had approached her from behind.

"Hey Carly, have you seen Sam and Fr…"

"Shush Brad…." She spit over her shoulder, not wanting to be distracted from what was unfolding in front of her.

"Carly, is something wrong" Brad said, coming closer to her, trying to see through the blinds to what she was looking at.

Carly knew that was a BAD idea, no one could know about this. She wasn't even sure that she was supposed to know about this. She had to think, and think fast. She turned to Brad and put on her very best 'cute girl' face.

"Oh, no Brad…nothing wrong. Really, it's nothing. I was just… just umm… just trying to uh..." She was drawing a blank. She was horrible at lying. "I was seeing if the two headed frog was still here. I, um, heard that it moved to the courtyard." She laughed and tossed her hair over her shoulder.

Brad did not appear to be buying this… at all. She had to throw him off the scent and get him out of this room… NOW!

"Hey, do you have any more of that fudge left?" she asked

"Ahh…sure… I guess" he answered, looking at her with suspicion "It's in my locker." He eased closer to Carly, now obviously trying to see behind her into the courtyard.

"Great!" she all but screamed, "you should go and get it. Like… right now!"

"Carly, are you sure you're alright? Where are Sam and Freddie? Are they out there?", this time his eyes lit up.

Brad had his own suspicions about Sam and Freddie's recent behavior. He was no Sam expert and had known Freddie for only a short time but even he, with his limited knowledge, knew that it was abnormal for Sam to be spending so much time with him and Freddie. Sam was a cute girl and all but, he and Sam had zero chemistry so he knew she wasn't doing it so she could spend time with him. And when he'd asked Freddie what he thought about Sam hanging with them so much the dude had gotten all tongue tied, red faced and changed the subject. It was all very weird, even for Sam and Freddie – who were, admittedly, a little strange under normal circumstances. Yep, something was up, and he had a sneaky suspicion that the answer was in the courtyard right now, being guarded by a very nervous Carly Shay.

"No, nothing out there, nothing at all to see" she forced a laugh, "no multi-headed frogs." She leaned against the window, blocking the bent blind with her arm in what she hoped was a relaxed looking pose.

"I'm really hungry for fudge all the sudden. Do you want fudge? You can never have too much fudgy goodness I always say" she giggled nervously.

Brad cocked an eyebrow at her.

"Oooookay," He said.

She was getting annoyed. Why couldn't he just go back to his locker and get the freaking fudge so she could get back to spying on Sam and Freddie's lip lock for Fatcakes sake!

"Okay, okay… I get it. You're hot for my fudge." Brad said, laughing at the brunette. He'd always thought Carly was cute, but she was especially cute when she was all flustered. Whatever she was looking at when he came in, she was definitely not going to let him in on it.

"How about I go get the fudge and meet you back at your classroom, I'd love to see how that sensory booth is going with Spencer. I heard you and Gibby released a stink so bad he passed out!" He waited for her reaction. Truth be told, he'd had a crush on Carly since he met her. She was exactly his type. Cute…and just a little weird.

"That'd be great Brad, I'll meet you there in just a minute"

Carly offered him a smile and waited exactly one second after the door shut to turn back to the window. Just as she assumed, the kiss was over. She had no idea how long it had lasted, but now Sam and Freddie were standing opposite each other, neither of them saying anything. Sam hooked her thumbs into the back pockets of her jeans and stared at the ground, kicking dirt with the toe of her sneakers. Every few seconds she'd raise her eyes slightly to peer at Freddie.

Freddie, it seemed, had lost the ability to move. He stood stock still, his arms in the exact same place they'd been when Sam kissed him. Carly could understand that. She felt frozen herself; completely unsure of what to do.

Carly liked her world organized; just like her locker. Everything had to have a place and a purpose. Sam and Freddie kissing was not a part of her organized world. Worse yet, she had no control over the situation, and if there was anything Carly Shay hated, it was being out of control.

Freddie and Sam's friendship had always been a shaky, fragile thing. It had been Carly's job to make sure that it held together and suddenly it was like a truce had been called after a very long war and Carly, the self-appointed peace keeper, was left standing in between two armies that had suddenly lost interest in killing each other. What was she supposed to do now?

She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. Everything inside told her to run right out that door and ask them both what they hell they thought they were doing. Right now they didn't even know that she'd seen them. And if this was anything like their "kissing just to do it" episode a couple years ago they may never tell her on their own. But she couldn't run out there now; because for once Carly Shay had no answers, and she had no idea what to do. All she knew was that things for their little threesome had just changed and would likely never be the same.

Sam and Freddie had kissed. This chizz was about to get real.


	2. Secret Society

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: This is a transformative work. I do not own iCarly

 

Sam sighed heavily and walked past a still stunned Freddie toward the cafeteria doors. It was really light outside. The lock-in must be nearly over which meant that somewhere her best friend Carly was looking for her, and she did not want Carly to find her out here… with Freddie.

Between the her face, which she knew must be a furious shade of red, and Freddie's dumbfounded silence Carly was sure to think something was up. And she'd be right. Something was up, but Sam was not in the mood or the frame of mind to deal with it right now.

She stopped and called to Freddie over her shoulder.

"Are you coming Benson or do you plan to stand there looking like a Super Nub all day?" She knew the crack was lame; not up to her normal standards, but she was tired, confused and, frankly, lacking the energy to come up with anything better.

Freddie followed her silently, raising his hand to his lips. He was still in shock. Sam Puckett, long time torturer, recent friend, had kissed him. Really kissed him. What in the name of Juveron was going on! When she paused at the door to the cafeteria he stopped her from opening it, placing his hand firmly on hers.

"What is it Fredwad?" Sam tried to sneer, but it was halfhearted.

He wasn't exactly sure what to say. He figured his next attempt at speaking to her should be better than the 'It's cool', he'd muttered right after she'd kissed him. He wanted to say a million things at once. But at the moment, as he looked down into her blue eyes, he didn't know where to start.

He started to speak, to say something-anything, when he saw a flick of the blinds on the window beside the door and a flash of pale skin and brown hair was visible. There was a very quiet squeak from behind the door. Sam seemed not to have noticed.

"Carly" He stuttered.

"Oh my God Benson! Why am I not surprised that after I kiss you, the first word coming from your ugly mug is 'Carly'" said Sam, suddenly irritated. She turned back to the door, threw his hand off of hers and started to open it.

"NO Sam! Carl….." He couldn't finish his sentence before she'd thrown the door open, intending to storm into the building, but instead running face first into the back of a retreating brunette.

"Carly!" she screamed

"I tried to tell you" Freddie whispered. Sam turned to him, her eyes shooting daggers. Freddie put his head down, suddenly very interested in his shoes.

"Hey guys", Carly said brightly… a little too brightly. Her voice was an octave higher than normal and she was shifting back and forth from one foot to the other. "What's up?" she said.

"Nothing" Sam said.

"Nada" Freddie added.

"What are you doing in here?" Sam asked, hoping against hope that Carly had just entered the cafeteria in the last 30 seconds and hadn't witnessed…it.

"Oh, I was um… just coming to get you guys. I mean I was looking for you guys and I… uh… I thought you might be together. Well, not together together! Just like, together…you know, like in the same place. Then I saw you outside making ou… I mean HIDING out… Of course not making out… I mean that's just CRAZY…right?" She let out a nervous giggle. She was a mess. How in the world was she going to be able to stand there and not tell them what she'd seen?

Carly was a notoriously horrible liar. Sam and Freddie were completely aware of this. When she tried to lie she got all tongue tied and started stuttering, her normally pale skin going scarlet in the cheeks. Tongue tied? Check. Stuttering? Check. Red cheeks? Check. So a quick assessment made three things clear. Carly was lying. She had seen them. The gig was up.

'This is ridiculous' Sam thought. This is what I get for following stupid girly advice. Make a move, they said. Take a chance, they said. Well she'd done that and look where it got her. Stuck in a hot cafeteria that still smelled like mystery meatloaf, watching Freddie stare at his feet and listening to Carly sputtering on.

'Dear God, please let the ground swallow me up…now' Freddie thought. If there was a hell he was standing firmly in the middle of it; between the girl he'd loved for as long as he could remember, and the girl he… God, he didn't even know what he felt for Sam. They'd gotten closer over the last few months. He could say he liked her for sure. He really enjoyed her company when it didn't result in cuts and bruises. She might be abrasive, and violent… and loud, but she was also really fun. He looked over at Sam. Her eyes were so blue. He'd noticed that lately. She had the bluest eyes he'd ever seen…and sometimes when she smiled at him his brain went all fuzzy.

'Get it together Benson', he thought. It's hormones, he thought. I mean I'm a regular guy and for all her faults Sam was still a girl. A girl with really great eyes and a really nice…He hit himself in the head, 'stop it' he thought. You cannot be thinking this way…it was too dangerous. But maybe Sam didn't think it was dangerous. I mean she had just kissed him. And he'd been too shocked to even respond.

Now he was stuck in the most awkward situation he'd ever been in with no idea what to say or what to do. He had options, but none of them seemed viable right now. Option 1- he could run. Just head right out the door and pray that Sam forgot all about the kiss. That wouldn't work. He wasn't too sure that he wanted her to forget the kiss. He wasn't sure that he wanted to forget it either. Option 2- He could pretend to pass out. Carly and Sam would be temporarily distracted and forget all about how uncomfortable this moment was. That wouldn't work either. Carly never forgot anything, and as pissed off as Sam looked right now she was likely to ignore his need for medical attention and kick him in the head while he was down. Definitely not an option. Option 3- He could man up and just say something. He could just be blunt and put it right out there 'Carly, Sam and I kissed…again'. Nope, that wouldn't work either. When Carly found out about the last kiss, Sam had taken a running leap onto him and beat him like it was her job. And he hadn't even been the one who told Carly that time. Nope. He valued his life and limbs too much for that option.

Then he thought of how much courage it must have taken for Sam to kiss him tonight. She really put herself out there, a very un-Sam thing to do. He admired her for that and thought that maybe, just maybe, if he spoke up now, Sam might come to admire him the same way. He took a deep breath, cleared his throat and turned to Carly.

"Let's just get this over with" Sam shouted, "I kissed the nub, okay?" She said throwing her hands in the air. Sighing heavily, she walked over to the tiled cafeteria wall and slid down into a seated position, putting her head in between her knees. "At least it's not a secret this time Carls,"

Carly stood silently, looking between the two of them. She looked… well it was really more of how she didn't look. She didn't look shocked.

Carly walked over to the same wall and sat down beside Sam. Freddie followed suit, sitting beside Carly.

"Thanks for telling me Sam" Carly said, "but I sort of already knew. I mean…I sort of… saw the whole thing" She looked from Sam to Freddie, "just tell me one thing…. How did this happen?"

Silence.

Freddie sat stiffly, legs stretched in front of him, fiddling with a loose string on the hem of his fitted blue and white button up shirt – waiting on Sam to respond. Sam sat with her knees pulled close, slumped over them as her wild blond hair fell in a sheet; hiding her face from view. Neither she nor Freddie offered a response. To that question, there was no easy answer.

The friendship between the three had always been weird, at least to anyone looking at it from the outside. To the three of them, however, it made completely imperfect sense. Carly was the sensible one; the mother hen. She balanced out the two extremes; Freddie and Sam. She refereed the fights, arranged the making up, organized their adventures and made sure that no one felt unimportant or unneeded. Then there were Sam and Freddie; the yin and yang. While Carly planned the adventures, Freddie worried about the details and Sam worked to find a way to make them even more fun; and maybe just a little illegal.

They were all comfortable with the arrangement; had never had a reason to question or change it. But things were different now. They were growing up, going in separate directions sometimes. And for reasons none of them could really comprehend right now the biggest change had been between Sam and Freddie. Once enemies, then friends by way of Carly, now they both had to admit that they were finding their way to a friendship of their own – separate from the girl who'd once been their only common ground.

These weren't thoughts or feelings they'd shared with each other, but somehow the thoughts, however unspoken, had altered the atmosphere around them. They were beginning to find common ground; more than they really thought possible. For instance, they both had an absent father; for different reasons, but the resulting pain was the same. So, unlike Carly, Sam understood why Freddie always stayed in the house in his pajamas on Father's day, and Freddie understood why Sam usually found a reason to leave the room when Carly got phone calls from her dad.

They both had mothers who were a little more than crazy. So while it sometimes stung when Freddie commented on Pamela Puckett's complete lack of mothering instincts or when Sam found a million different ways to call Freddie's overprotective mom a psycho, they took each other's insults in stride. They both agreed; sometimes the truth is easier to deal with if you make fun of it.

There were also fun things – they both still watched cartoons every Saturday morning, had a secret fear of clowns, a mild obsession with MMA fighting, and had saved every baby tooth they'd ever lost. They also both loved gory, horror movies; unlike Carly. This fact in particular was what had started this whole messy ball rolling.

(Flashback: 3 months ago)

It was a rainy Saturday and Sam was bored out of her skull. She'd shown up at Carly's apartment, hoping to find something to do – and something to eat. After knocking on Carly's door and getting no answer she'd texted her to find out where she was.

SAM: Where r u Shay? im hngry and bored. Need fun… and ham... NOW!

Carly: OMG. 4got 2 tell u. goin 2 Yakima 2 see Gramps. Won't b home til Sunday nite.

SAM: Serious suckage! What am I posed to do now?

Carly: Iz Freddie home?

SAM: That matters y?

Carly: U could hang w/him. Go over iCarly stuff…

SAM: im not THAT bored Shay

Carly: Sam…

Sam: l8r girly. Tell the old cooter I said hi. Puckett out…

She'd turned from her spot at Carly's door, headed for the elevator. Looked like another day of watching her mom drink and scream insults at the people on the television. As she turned to walk away, the door to Freddie's apartment had opened. Freddie's head peeked out from behind the door. He had a serious case of bedhead.

"What's up Sir Nubs-A-Lot?" Sam snickered.

"Good morning to you too, Sam. What are you doing here? Carly and Spencer are in Yakima" he yawned and opened the door wider stepping into the hall. Sam immediately burst out laughing.

"Seriously Benson, if you don't want me making fun of you please quit giving me so much ammunition!" she leaned over putting her hands on her knees trying to calm her laughter.

Freddie realized, too late, that he should have stayed behind the door. He was standing in the hallway, clad in his Galaxy Wars pajama bottoms that were about 2 inches too short (stupid growth spurt!). His faded t-shirt boldly stated "Nerds Rock". He was NEVER going to hear the end of this.

"Whatever, Puckett. You still haven't answered my question. What are you doing here?"

At that moment Sam caught a whiff of something heavenly coming from Freddie's apartment. Without permission or invitation she walked across the hall, pushed Freddie out of the way and entered his apartment. When she bumped into him she couldn't help but notice that he wasn't as soft as he used to be. In fact, he wasn't soft at all. She thought she might have even felt a bicep!

"Hey!" he said, rubbing the shoulder she'd just rammed into, closing his front door before following behind her.

Inside Freddie's apartment the blinds were drawn so that very little light filled the room. The only sources of light were coming from the living room and the small light over the stove where, much to Sam's delight, there were pancakes, eggs and bacon in the final stages of cooking.

"Aww… Freddalina's mommy made him breakfast" Sam laughed over her shoulder as she walked toward the kitchen.

"Hey… I'll have you know I made my own breakfast! I love cooking actually, it's sort of a hobby I guess" Freddie said, "Go ahead, tell me how 'girly' that makes me"

Sam was silently impressed. The food looked great, and she had no idea that Freddie knew how to cook.

"Where is crazy.. I mean, your mom? I'm surprised she lets you near the stove! Do you have on your fireproof undies?" she laughed

"Not that it's any of your business, but my mom isn't here. She's working until 7am. Double shift."

"You mean she left you here.. all alone… overnight! Will wonders never freakin' cease!" Sam said, shoving a piece of bacon-hot from the pan, into her mouth as she hopped up onto the kitchen counter opposite the stove.

Freddie had entered the kitchen and set about finishing breakfast. Flipping the pancakes he smiled to himself, strangely happy to have been able to surprise Sam. It was always good to keep Puckett on her toes.

"So I assume you're staying for breakfast?" He asked her, already knowing her answer.

"Of course, and you'd probably better cook some more bacon, otherwise, what are you going to eat?" she said picking up the entire plate of bacon Freddie had just placed beside her on the counter.

Freddie finally got all the food placed on plates, even garnishing them with a little parsley and twisted orange slices. He took the plates over to the small eat in area off of the kitchen.

"Wow… look at Wolfgang Punk" Sam said, following him to the table.

"Can it Puckett, or no bacon for you" Freddie called over his shoulder.

They sat at the table eating and laughing at random stuff. They talked about everything and nothing at all; upcoming episodes of iCarly, their mutual disdain for Ms. Briggs, how weird it was that there were actually people in the world who didn't like pancakes. Sam told a hilarious story about how her cat Frothy had attacked their mailman who screamed so loud he woke up her mother who ran out of the house –without pants - brandishing a broom. Freddie told her about Magical Malika's most recent attempt to get him to date her; and how he still couldn't figure out how she'd made his underwear disappear while still on his body.

It was a strange conversation, not because of the topics, but because of how much fun it was and how normal it felt. They had both laughed until tears were streaming down Sam's face and Freddie had a stitch in his side. And they'd actually made it through an entire hour without Sam hitting him – not even once.

"So Benson, why were you just sitting in here in the dark" Sam asked.

"Well, if you must know, before I was rudely interrupted by a blond headed demon who forced her way into my apartment and ate ALL my bacon… I was watching a movie"

"What kind of movie? A chick flick? Romantic comedy?" Freddie was silent for one too many seconds, raising Sam's suspicions. "Oh my God Fredward! You were watching porn weren't you!" Sam ran to the living room, thinking she'd caught him in the act.

"NO! Jeez, Sam!" Freddie said, beginning to clear the dishes off the table. He took them to the sink to start loading the dishwasher. He already knew Sam was not going to help him clean up.

"Nothing to be ashamed of Benson, you are a growing teenage boy with needs. If you want to sit in the dark and watch 'Big Bodacious Booties Part 42', who am I to judge?" Sam snickered plopping herself down on the Bensons' large blue plaid sectional. She picked up the remote, and turned on the TV., prepared to laugh at whatever smut Freddie was watching.

"Wait a minute" she said, "this isn't porn!" She turned to look at Freddie.

"Hello! I told you I wasn't watching porn" Freddie threw her an exasperated look as he closed the dishwasher, walking over to join her on the sofa.

"No, I mean. This is 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre" she exclaimed, "the original!"

"Of course it's the original", he answered, "vintage horror is the best, the remakes all suck." Freddie grabbed a box of DVD's from the floor and scooted closer to Sam to show it to her. "I've also got 'Sleepaway Camp' 1, 2 and 3, 'Night of the Living Dead', and, for contemporary gore fans: 'Hostel 1 & 2'. Today is my annual 'Blood and Gore Spectacular'"

Sam's mouth fell open in shock. She loved horror movies. Love was probably not the best word. She adored them; followed the religiously. She'd take a good old fashion slash fest over a girly romantic comedy any day of the week. But for Freddie Benson to love them too, that was just…weird! He was so…. Soft and weak. Well, not so soft anymore apparently. She wouldn't have thought he'd have the stomach for horror movies. She was even more impressed when she realized that he had apparently planned to eat breakfast while watching the movie… too cool!

"Why are you sitting there with your jaw in your lap Puckett?" Freddie smirked. Point number 2 for him for today. Yep, he was definitely keeping her on her toes today.

"I'm just shocked is all" she said, beginning to rifle through the box of movies. "I would never have pegged you as the horror movie type."

"It's not just a type," he said, "horror movies are a way of life. I am an aficionado." He said proudly. "Go ahead, ask me anything" He clapped his hands together, waiting for her question.

"Hmmm... okay then. Let's see what you're made of Captain Techwad." She thought for a second before saying, "Okay, you'll never get this one… name the movie this quote is from 'You can't kill the boogeyman" Sam sat back with her arms crossed over her chest, sure that he wouldn't guess it.

"Come on Puckett, can't you come up with something a little challenging? Halloween. The original, from 1978." He sat back with a self-satisfied grin "What else you got?"

"Okay" Sam said "You're right, that one was easy." She thought for a moment. "Try this one on for size…. horror movie nominated for the most Academy Awards…name and number of nominations please." If he got this, his stock with Sam would rise significantly.

Freddie sat and thought for a minute, his brow furrowed in concentration. Sam sat up straighter, thinking she'd gotten him this time. Suddenly his eyes lit up and he jumped up from his seat.

"The Exorcist. 10 Academy Award nominations in 1973. Won 2. In the same year it was also nominated for 7 Golden Globes…won 4" he screamed throwing his fists triumphantly in the air, "There! In your face Puckett!" He started doing a dorky happy dance and Sam laughed. She had to hand it to the dork. He knew his chizz!

"Okay, okay, I guess I can officially induct you now", she turned to him seriously.

"What the heck are talking about Sam? Induct me into what" he asked, raising his eyes in suspicion.

"Sit down Whizpants" she said. Freddie sat cautiously opposite her. "Okay now raise your right hand" she instructed, holding out the worn cover of his Texas Chainsaw Massacre DVD case. Freddie did as he was told.

"Okay," Sam said, "Today is an important day. A day that will live on in infancy.

"Infamy, Sam" He laughed

"Infancy, Infamy, who cares. Just shut it fudgeface; before I change my mind." She said.

Freddie shut his mouth and tried to contain his laughter.

"Today, young Fredward Benson, you are being officially inducted into the Samantha Puckett Society of Blood, Gore and Guts. Membership in this exclusive and secret society requires that you work at all times to promote and support the art of the horror film. Do you so swear" She asked him solemnly.

"I do so swear" Freddie answered, just as serious.

"And do you promise, to immediately hate all horror movie parodies?" She asked

"I do so swear"

"And do you promise to boldly proclaim your love of American Horror cinema, even if you know that Asian horror is twice as good?"

"I do so swear"

"And finally… and this is the most important one" she whispered, "do you agree to accompany the other members of the Society to showings of all new horror movies, and pay for all of Sam's refreshments while there" She said the last part while trying to suppress a smile.

"What…." Freddie said lowering his hand.

"Do you want to be in the society or not Benson! We got standards!"

"Okay, okay," he said reluctantly, "I do so swear"

Sam jumped up and clapped him roughly on the back.

"Congratulations nub, welcome to the Society of Blood, Guts and Gore. Probably the only club, besides the AV geek squad, that will allow you entrance!"

She laughed and took her seat back on the sectional.

Freddie had laughed and that began a very interesting day spent with Sam. They sat on the sofa all day and late into the night, watching movies. Screaming, laughing, talking and just being them. Freddie and Sam… no Carly.

They'd ordered pizza at midnight after which Sam stood in the middle of the living room to demonstrate her ability to burp the alphabet. She'd only made it to J, insisting that her inability to go any further was because her jeans her were too tight from all the junk they'd eaten. That's when she decided it was time to head home, 'Mama does need her rest', she'd said.

"And if you don't get out of those tight jeans soon, you'll pop a button and put my eye out!" Freddie had laughed and put his hands up to guard from the fists he knew were coming.

Sam punched him in the arm as she gathered her bag and headed to the door. Freddie walked with her as far as the elevator, stretching and yawning. It was nearly 2 in the morning. He'd offered to walk her home, but typical Sam, she'd refused…unless he wanted to carry her home.

I will never understand why girls wear such uncomfortable clothes" Freddie commented

"Please, my clothes aren't half as bad as most of the girls I know" Sam said, then she paused , "but thank you Fredalupe." Freddie looked over at her, puzzled.

"Thank you for what?"

"For offering to walk me home, even though I'd probably be the one that'd have to protect you." She laughed, "and for noticing" She added the last part quickly and under her breath.

"Noticing what" Freddie said

"You know, that I'm a girl and all that chizz"

Freddie stopped and looked at her earnestly

"You know, most guys don't notice that… about me I mean." Sam said, looking at Freddie, who was studying her with his head to the side and an odd look on his face. "I mean… you know… because I'm not all 'soft and girly and weak'." Freddie still hadn't said anything and Sam was starting to regret that she had. "Okay, well….later Benson" She turned to walk into the elevator when she felt a hand grab her arm.

"Sam, wait!" Freddie said. He released her arm and scratched his head, trying to figure out how to say what he wanted to say.

"Listen Fredward, as much fun as it is to stand here watching you scratch your head, I've got places to be" Sam said, moving to push the 'Close Door' button on the elevator.

Freddie put his hand up to block the shutting doors.

"Burping the alphabet isn't exactly the height of femininity." He laughed softly, "But you aren't most girls. And… I like that". With that, he stepped back into the hallway and waved to Sam as the doors began to shut.

"Geez Freddifer… cheesy much" Sam snickered. Before the doors closed she yelled "Space Zombies 3 next Friday at 8 o'clock, and you're buying the popcorn!."

"Whatever you say Princess Puckett, whatever you say." Freddie laughed as he opened the door to his apartment. He might be crazy but he could almost swear…he'd just made Sam blush.

That's how it had started. In a dark room, over blood, guts… and bacon, they'd become friends.

[Present Day]

Carly looked at Sam, waiting for her to answer the question. Waiting for her to say something that would make all of this make sense.

"I don't know Carly. It just… I don't know. I…"

Sam's words were drowned out by a loud ringing. The lock-in was over and Sam breathed a sigh of relief. She'd been, very literally, saved by the bell.

The doors to the cafeteria opened and bright light flooded the room. Standing in the doorway was Principle Franklin, flanked on both sides by a smiling Gibby and a visibly nauseated Spencer. Spencer, his face a disturbing shade of green, leaned against the door way; trying to catch his breath. He raised his hand slowly, pointing a shaky finger at Carly.

"You!" he said before collapsing onto Principle Franklin who struggled to hold him up.

Carly stood quickly, rushing over to her brother. She grabbed onto his right side, helping Principle Franklin get him down into a sitting position.

"The room," Spencer breathed, "Its spinning. So fast. Its all whirly. Can you make it stop…I beg you!" he grabbed Carly's arm, pleading with her.

Principle Franklin stood back with his arms crossed, looking at Spencer with concern.

"I found him passed out in your sensory chamber" He stated, looking threateningly at Gibby.

"Gibby!" Carly screamed, "What did you do to him!"

"Oh, Carly… it was amazing! You missed it! I turned up the stink to 12…"

"Twelve!" Carly screamed, "That's the highest level! Why would you.."

"It wasn't just the stink though" Gibby said, "I cranked up the stink, then I played the flashing lights and the bad music… all at the same time! It was epic! We are so going to get an A on this project!" He said proudly, leaning down to pat Spencer on the shoulder "And it's all because of my buddy Spence!" He raised his hand above Spencer's head, "up top buddy!"

"I think I hate you" Spencer said before losing consciousness and slumping against the wall.

Sam and Freddie looked at each other before standing and walking over to where the commotion was coming from.

'Well,' Freddie thought… 'I guess Option 2 actually did work. I just wasn't the one who passed out.'

After Spencer regained consciousness, Carly apologized to him profusely, and promised Principle Franklin that she'd be fine getting Spencer home. Sam and Carly walked out behind Principle Franklin. Spencer's legs were still shaky so Gibby and Freddie walked on either side of him, holding him up.

"Sam.." Carly whispered to her friend.

"Can we please not talk about this right now?" Sam begged, glancing over her shoulder at Freddie. He was looking right at her. She had to get out of here…now!

"We need to talk about it. I need to talk about it. That's what I do, I talk about things!" Carly said.

"Will you please keep your voice?" Sam whispered

"What do you want to talk about Carly?" Gibby asked, inserting himself into their conversation.

"Nothing Gibby" Carly said, looking apologetically at Sam.

"No offense Carls, but I really don't want to have this conversation with you. I don't even want to have it with myself!" Sam said.

"And I didn't want to watch my best friend playing tonsil hockey with my tech producer, but we can't always get what we want now can we!" Carly said a bit too loudly.

"Who was playing tonsil hockey?' Gibby called out to Carly.

"Shut it Gibby" Sam threatened before turning back to Carly. Grabbing her hand, she pulled her to the side by the lockers, allowing Gibby and Freddie to walk past them with Spencer.

"Okay, okay. I know." Sam said, " I'm sorry you had to see it, and I swear we'll talk about it…."

Carly smiled¸ relieved.

"Tomorrow" Sam said and took off running for the entrance door, "later peeps" she said over her shoulder, almost running over Brad, who stood by the entrance door with his book bag slung over his shoulder and all the gear from he, Freddie and Sam's project in a box at his feet.

Carly sighed. Leave it to Sam to find a way to avoid talking… or helping them lug Spencer and all their stuff back to Bushwell Plaza. Brad walked up to her, handing her a small container of fudge. He stared after Sam, before turning to Carly, Sam and Gibby with a look of confusion on his face.

"Hey guys, where have you been?" He asked, "what the heck happened to Spencer?"

"It's a long story Brad. Let's just say, Gibby got a little over excited about our project" Carly said, shaking her head as she followed Gibby, Freddie and Spencer out the exit door.

Laughing to himself Brad grabbed the box of equipment from the floor and followed the group out into the sunny Seattle morning. Something told him this was about more than a project… a lot more.


	3. My Same

 

Why did you kiss me?...

What does this mean?...

What are we going to say to Carly?...

He could think of a million things to say now when it was, the last time he checked, 8 hours too late. Perfect timing.

Freddie had walked home with Carly, Gibby and Brad; he and Gibby dragging Spencer along between them. Upon entering the lobby of Bushwell Plaza, they'd been immediately accosted by the deranged doorman, Lewbert.

"Hey" Lewbert sneered; leaning over the front desk, absentmindedly twirling the hair in his wart, "no dying in my lobby!"

"No one's dying Lewbert" Freddie responded

"I think I might be dying" Spencer said, raising his head to look at Lewbert. Spencer looked decidedly better than he had at Ridgeway, but he was still a little green in the face.

"Then no lookin' like you're dying. And no pukin' either unless you're gonna clean it up yourself!" Lewbert screamed; lodging a muffin at Carly's head before retreating to the office behind the desk.

Freddie just shook his head. This day was just getting better and better.

By the time they'd reached Carly's floor and deposited Spencer on the couch in the Shays' living room, Freddie was pretty certain that his legs would never work properly again. Spencer might be tall and gangly but, after half a mile, he was heavy!

He could tell that Carly wanted to talk to him, but the presence of Gibby, who still wanted to know who was playing tonsil hockey at the lock-in, and Brad, who didn't seem to want to leave, made it difficult. That was just fine with Freddie. He wasn't ready to talk to Carly when he hadn't even talked to Sam yet.

Sam. He remembered her running past him out of the school. He'd just watched her leave and not said a word. He could have blamed it on the fact that he was busy trying to keep a nauseated 26 year old man upright, but that would be have been a lie, because even if he hadn't been struggling to keep Spencer from falling down, he still wouldn't have known what to say. Now in his room, by himself, the questions flew fast and furious.

"Do you know your hair always smells like vanilla?"

"Do you know that your lips are the softest things I've ever felt?"

Of course he could think of things now. The moment had passed. There was no pressure. No school full of kids, no awkward silences, no Carly... and no Sam. He guessed it really didn't matter. Even if he'd had the presence of mind to ask these questions then, how did he expect her to respond?

She'd taken off right after the lock in; hadn't walked home with Carly like she normally would or even stopped by to check on Spencer. She had, however, sent Carly a text as they walked home and asked if Spencer was okay. Correction. What she'd actually done was ask Carly for "status on Pukey McPansypants", but they knew what she meant.

It was Sunday – Pam Puckett's bingo day- so he knew Sam would be home alone. He wondered what she was doing; wondered if she, like him, was sitting alone trying to work up the courage to call.

Now he sat in his room, absentmindedly toying with his AV equipment and listening to music. 'Running Away' by A.M. played in the background, as it had been over and over since he got home. He signed, opened the center drawer to his desk and took out a picture.

He'd taken it with his mobile phone two weeks ago in a vintage video store he and Sam had found in downtown Seattle. Sam had actually been the one to notice it as she and Freddie were walking home from a matinee of 'The Thirst'; a new vampire movie. Sam had shrieked when she saw the store, and dragged Freddie inside by the back of his shirt. He hadn't even struggled. In the course of his new friendship with Sam he'd learned that the injuries were greatly lessened when he just went with the flow.

Inside the store there had been a giant Michael Myers cutout and Sam had staged herself beside it; smiling like she and Michael Myers were old friends on their way to a day at the park. He'd raised his phone to snap a picture of her and at the last minute she'd pulled him into the shot, throwing his phone at the acne ridden face of the cashier.

"Hey you… take our picture" she'd demanded. The cashier caught the phone just before it hit his face.

"Dude, you gotta get closer," He said, "I can't get you in the shot… Go on and get close, Old Mikey doesn't bite." The cashier laughed at his own joke; his voice slow enough for Freddie to suspect that the smell coming from the back of the store wasn't just incense.

Freddie reached around the back of the cutout to get closer and his hand landed softly on Sam's back. Her tank top had lifted just enough for his fingers to feel bare flesh. He froze. Who would have thought that Sam Puckett would be that soft? His adolescent mind was suddenly flooded with images of bare skin and…. 'Get it together Freddie' he told himself. But a teen boy's hormones are notoriously unresponsive to logical demands. '1… 2… 3… puppies, hobos, icky cousin Amanda' he attempted to distract his brain from what his hands were feeling.

"Quit trying to feel me up dorkwad" Sam had spat, but she hadn't moved his hand. And he hadn't either.

They'd left the store after that, walking together back to Bushwell Plaza. Sam had gone to Carly's and Freddie had waited their customary 10 minutes before going over too. Carly never seemed to suspect how much time he and Sam were spending together; their time together was a world that only existed for them and somehow it didn't seem right to share it with anyone – even Carly.

But now that world was out in the open. No more hiding.

He had to talk to her.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Sam opened her eyes reluctantly.

'Why can't I sleep!" she thought. She loved sleep; in her opinion it ranked right up there with summer vacation and all-you-can eat buffets. Today more than ever she longed for sweet, sweet, unconsciousness; anything to avoid dealing with the recent turn of events. But after tossing and turning for hours one thing was clear… it wasn't going to happen.

She moaned out loud, pulling her pillow over her head to muffle a scream. She was so confused! And feeling confused made her mad! This whole thing was Carly's fault she thought. Her influence on Sam over the course of their friendship was obvious to. Before meeting Carly, Sam had been much more interested in giving boys wedgies than kissing them. Sure, she'd only been ten when she met Carly, but still! She would probably never be as girly as Carly but these days she was a lot more prone to girly tendencies than she had once been. Last night's fiasco was proof.

Okay, maybe she was being unfair. Maybe it wasn't Carly's fault. Sure, being friends with Carly had changed her (she could not only say panties now…she actually even wore them from time to time) but most of the changes were good. And Carly might make fun of Sam's loud, obnoxious, meat loving personality but at the end of the day she loved Sam just like she was…no change required. There weren't many people Sam could say that about.

She could, however, blame Carly for the fact that things had changed between her and Freddie. If Carly had never gone to see her grandpa on that day three months ago then Sam would never had gone to Freddie's house, and she'd be laying in her bed blissfully asleep right now, instead of worrying about the nub. That day had changed everything. She'd never admit that to anyone else, but it was true. Without Carly planted firmly between them they'd found their way into each other lives. Even more amazing than that was the fact that she was actually glad that it had happened. She was sure it had all gone straight down the crapper yesterday when she kissed him, but until then she'd actually been enjoying their new friendship.

Freddie had actually turned out to be a cool kid, not that she'd ever said that to his face. They'd been hanging out for two… no three months now. Not all the time or anything but more and more often. They had watched every new horror movie that had come out; and even caught special showings of classics at small out of the way theaters. Carly never came with them; they'd never invited her. Carly hated scary movies, but Sam and Freddie were both fanatics; card carrying members of The Society of Blood, Gore and Guts. So they'd gone to the movies together; Sam had even been able to get Freddie to sneak out to few midnight showings with her.

He always bought her snacks; at first - because she demanded it, but later he did it without her even asking. He'd sit with his legs (which, she noticed, were considerably longer this year) stretched in front of him while she sat bundled in her seat, knees drawn to her chin. In the darkness of the theater they were anonymous. They weren't Sam and Freddie who were bound, by an unspoken agreement, to torture each other. They were just a boy and a girl, enjoying a movie together. Above all, they were friends.

She wasn't used to guys doing nice things for her; at least not without being force. But Freddie would always hold the door to the theater open for her when they entered and when they left. She'd forgotten her jacket when they went to see 'Mutilation' last month, he'd given her his, even though she knew he had to be freezing in only his t-shirt. He even held the popcorn bucket so she didn't get grease all over her pants; not that she would have cared – but it was nice, just the same. Every time he did something like that Sam got an unfamiliar and unwelcome feeling in the pit of her stomach. She was never sure how to react. At first she'd made fun of him; asked him if he learned such good manners in a class he took with his mommy. He'd just told her to shut it and offered her the popcorn bucket. Now when he held the door for her she just walked through it quietly – a very un-Sam thing to do – and tried to ignore the squirmy feeling in her stomach.

In the past two weeks it had gotten even worse. On their way home from a matinee of 'The Thirst' she'd lapsed into silence. Freddie kept looking over at her, well down at her actually (when had the dork gotten so tall anyway!), and smiling. Sam had no idea what that smile meant, but every time she saw it she got an overwhelming urge to stop right there in the middle of the sidewalk and stick her tongue firmly down his throat. The desire to do so rushed at her from a million places at once and scared her half to death. It was impossible! She could not feel that way about Freddie. I mean, he was…Freddie! King of the Dorks! Love sick puppy pining after Carly! Lover of all thing Galaxy Wars related! He was not someone she should be feeling this way about. But her body must not have been listening to her brain because it went right on telling her to put him in a lip lock.

As they walked, their hands had periodically brushed against each other and her fingers would tingle. She was ready to take off running for home and a much needed cold shower when she'd seen the display window for a vintage horror movie store. She'd stopped in her tracks and screamed her excitement, pulling Benson by the collar behind her, into the store. It was amazing! It was filled with old horror movie posters and DVDs as well as old props, masks, costumes and special effects makeup. She and Freddie had stood in the doorway like children approaching the tree on Christmas morning and the strange feelings she'd had just a moment before quieted.

Looking over at Freddie, who was intently inspecting a Leatherface mask, she thought that finding this store must be a sign. It was like the universe was telling her to get her chizz together and quit being such a girl; Freddie was her friend and that all he was meant to be. There, surrounded by the movies they loved, she'd felt better. The pull on her heart had lightened and she and Frederly had gone back to talking and joking.

Near the register she'd noticed a life size cutout of Michael Myers (her all-time favorite serial killer) and she'd moved to pose beside it. Freddie had raised his phone to take a picture of her, cracking up at exactly how natural it looked for her to be standing beside a serial killer like they were friends. She'd grabbed his camera and thrown it to the cashier so that Freddie could pose with her on the other side of the cutout.

Just as she'd shouted at the cashier to 'get it movin'', Freddie had reached around the back of the cutout, and in that completely absurd moment, with she, Freddie and Michael Myers standing there like old friends, she'd felt his fingers on the exposed skin of her back where her tank top had ridden up. His fingers were hot, or maybe it was just her, either way the squirmy feeling had returned – full force.

"Quit trying to feel me up dorkwad" she'd said with a smile, praying that he couldn't feel her trembling. But he hadn't moved his hand. And she didn't want him to.

She was jarred from her thoughts by her vibrating phone. She pulled the pillow from where it was resting over her face and sat up. It was probably Carly. She'd been sending Sam texts all afternoon. None of them had contained the words 'Freddie" or 'kiss', but the absence of those words only made it more apparent to Sam just how badly Carly wanted to discuss it.

She'd answered with short two or three word answers – she didn't mention the kiss either. After Carly had sent the last text, asking her to come over for a "girl's night", Sam quit responding. She knew that "girls night" was Carly code for "Carly providing Sam unlimited snacks in an effort to get Sam to spill her guts". The snacks sounded good-she was really hungry- but the spilling guts thing was not an option.

She reached over to her nightstand to grab her phone. It wasn't Carly.

On reflex she threw the phone into her closet and threw herself back down on the bed. This was not happening.

The vibrations stopped and Sam breathed a sigh of relief. Until they started again. And again. And again. That's four messages now. This kid was not going to give up.

Sam groaned as she rose from her bed and tried to find her phone in the mess that was her closet. There among shoes, shirts, old homework assignments, and baskets of laundry Sam felt panic begin to rise when she couldn't find her phone. The next text was a welcome sound as she followed the ring and illuminated screen to the far corner of her closet. Inside a mangy old boot she found her phone and carried it back to her bed.

What was he going to say? Some very unpleasant options came to mind.

"What the hell is wrong with you Puckett!"…

"Why would you try to stick your tongue in my mouth"…

"Please refrain from any further embarrassing public displays; you're ruining my chances with Carly"…

"This text is to inform you of my desire to resign from the Society of Blood, Guts and Gore. Buy your own popcorn you blond headed demon!"…

'Well, Sam," she thought, "it's now or never." She ran her thumb over the screen to bring it to life and there, sure enough, there were five unread text messages.

4:00 pm Freddison: We need 2 talk…

4:02 pm Freddison: Can you come over? Can we meet somewhere?

4:06 pm Freddison: Okay Puckett, this is getting annoying. I know u see me texting u!

4:10 pm Freddison: Quit ignoring me! Seriously!

4: 15 pm Freddison: U got 5 minutes to call me or im comin over there….

Her phone buzzed again and a new message popped up.

4:21 pm Freddison: Have it your way. I'll be there in 10

She looked over at her clock. 4:23. Cheese. And. Rice.

'Calm down Sam," she thought, "you've still got at least 5 minutes to get out of here." She stood up, stretching as she realized that she had her pajamas on. 4:25. No time to change. Oh well, it wasn't like she'd never been out in public in her pajamas before. She opened the door to her bedroom, and headed for the stairs. She knew it was ridiculous, running from Freddie when she could just hide in the house, continue to ignore his calls and pretend not to hear the doorbell. The doorbell!

Sam froze on the steps as the familiar jangling of her doorbell filled the house. She crept slowly and softly down the stairs. Okay, her options were really limited now, she could either go down the stairs, open the door and face Freddie or she could go back upstairs and put her head under the covers.

She'd decided on the latter when she heard the sound of her front door opening.

Shit! Her mom hadn't locked the door behind her when she left for bingo! Maybe she'd get lucky and it'd just be a robber or one of her mother's sleazy boyfriends looking to "share" her bingo winnings.

"Sam…" She heard Freddie call out into the darkening house.

Sam and her mother lived in the house her grandparents had left them. It wasn't as fancy as Carly's house. She didn't have a doorman or room for a studio but it was cozy, and being here reminded her that at one point she'd had a normal life; complete with a dad and grandparents. She'd lived here for most of her life and could tell, just by the sound of the creaking floorboards, exactly where Freddie was standing. He was in the living room, beside her couch.

The stairs in her house were loud, creaking no matter how light you stepped, so turning around and going back upstairs was not going to work. She was going to have to use the band aid method; just yank the sucker off and scream like mad. Hurt like hell but it would be over with. She stepped from the shadows of the second floor stairway into the entryway that separated the dining room from the living room.

"How's it hanging Fredward" she said, giving him a halfhearted smile.

"Hey" he said, gesturing toward her front door "Sorry about that… it was open."

"I thought you weren't coming for ten minutes?" She said. A blush rose in Freddie's cheeks.

"Oh that. Well… I was actually already headed this way when I sent the first text. I knew it was your mom's bingo day. And I knew you were at home…"

"Carly" they said in unison, laughing to try to offset the awkwardness.

"Yeah," he said, "she texted me to ask if I'd seen you so I knew you weren't with her". He looked over to where Sam stood against the door jam.

"And how did you know I wasn't somewhere else… with someone else?" She asked, curious. She knew she was giving him a hard time… she couldn't help it.

"Well," Freddie sighed, "I guess…I didn't really know. I just sort of… hoped. Hoped you'd be here."

"Well, I think we both know why you're here, so…", Sam walked towards the sofa and sat down, "let's get it over with Freddie-O". She sat Indian style on the sofa, facing the TV, avoiding Freddie's gaze as sat down on the edge of the cushion furthest from her.

She didn't know a whole lot about these kinds of things, but she was pretty sure Freddie's body language was telling her that this was not going to be a fun conversation. She began to nervously tap her fingers on knees.

They sat silently for a minute, then five, then ten. The only sounds were Freddie's periodic sighs and the nervous tap, tap, tapping of Sam's fingers on her knees. Neither of them spoke. For his part, Freddie seemed to open his mouth, then think better of the idea and close it, a few times. Each time it looked like he might say something, Sam tensed up, biting the inside of her cheek and suppressing the urge to run out of the room.

Beside her she heard Freddie draw in a big breath, and shift in his seat so that he was facing her.

"Listen Sam, I have some stuff to say. And as much as you're going to want to, I'm asking you to resist the urge to say anything until I'm done." He looked at her seriously, "I mean it Sam! It's going to hard enough to say; I don't need you throwing me off or giving me your two cents..." he looked over to her, "or throwing any punches if you hear something you don't like." He added the last part with a raised eyebrow and Sam had to admit… he really knew her.

"Alright Captain Tech-Head… let's hear it." She braced herself. If he thought she would hit him because of what he was going to say she was fairly certain it was going to be bad. 'At least it will be over soon', she thought, 'and we can go back to normal… I hope.'

Freddie rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. The movement made the muscles in his back tense. If you'd told Sam a year ago that Fredward Benson would grow up to fill out a t-shirt like that, she'd have laughed in your face. But it was true. As he sat fidgeting on the edge of the sofa, the material stretched and hugged against his muscles; the sleeves tight around the biceps that were a very recent edition – and much appreciated on her part.

'Concentrate Sam!', She thought.

Freddie sighed before beginning again.

"Sam. I know we've got this … situation to deal with. I mean what happened yesterday at the lock-in. That was…" He got quiet and shook his head, trying to find the right word. "It was…I don't know…it was…"

"Unexpected?" Sam blurted out, forgetting her agreement to silence.

Freddie shot a warning glance her way.

"Yes…no. I mean yes and no." He sighed, "I mean we've been spending time together but, uh, I didn't exactly expect you to like…kiss me...I just…" He drew another blank.

"Freddie it's cool. We don't have to talk about this. We can just forg…." She didn't have an opportunity to finish her sentence as Freddie jumped up and started pacing in front of the sofa, turning to point a finger at her.

"Sam…" He said, raising an eyebrow in warning, "I think I told you to shut it…Why do you never listen? Why do you always…ugh! See, that's the problem right there! That's exactly what I mean!" He stopped pacing and looked at her as if she should understand. She did not.

"You drive me nuts Samantha Puckett!" Freddie threw his hands in the air, resuming his pacing in front of the sofa. "You've always driven me crazy! You've made a point of it for as long as can remember. It's like our thing. For the last few years I'd actually dream about what life would be like without you in it. And then… then things started changing and … well, I didn't know what to do. I mean I had no idea what to do.

"Fre…" Sam started to speak and was quickly silence by Freddie who raised his hand as if to tell her to stop right there.

"Sam, I already know what you're going to say. You're going to tell me to quit being a girl about this; that I should just chalk it up as some dumb mistake that didn't mean anything. You're going to say it'll be easier if we just forget it and go back to the way things were. And you're absolutely right; it would be easier, but here's my problem…" He stopped pacing and looked down at her, "I don't think I want to forget it. I know that I don't want to forget it Sam. And I don't think you want to either"

Feeling bolder he knelt in front of Sam on the sofa.

"If anyone had told me a year ago… hell, even four months ago that there would ever come a day that I felt this way about you, I think I'd have had them committed. When you showed up at my house three months ago, I just chalked it up to you being bored and me being available. But then we started hanging out and, call me crazy Sam but, the more time I spend with you, the more I can't… I can't get you out of my head! And its nuts really, because you aren't any of the things I told myself I wanted. I mean, you make fun of me and you're always saying something to embarrass me. But the more I get to know you, the more I see these…these other things about you. Like how loyal you are; how you make fun of me but get so mad if anyone else does it. And how funny you are; no matter how bad my day has been, you always find a way to make me laugh, even if it's at myself."

Sam sat listening to Freddie, fighting the urge to get up and run out of the room. Freddie's words were touching a part of that she'd never felt; even with Jonah. It was like a door was opening up inside and all she wanted to do was try to keep it closed. If she let him in, let her guard down, even for a minute she was giving him all the power. The power to hurt her, the power to break her heart. The thought made her blood run cold. But holding back was hard. Holding back from Freddie was starting to feel impossible and for just one moment she wondered if maybe it was time…to let go.

She tilted her head up, risking a look at Freddie.

Freddie's face softened as he continued.

"And you're beautiful. Like really beautiful, and I don't even think you know it. Without make up or girly clothes. Without trying to be anyone but who you are; you're beautiful without even trying."

He leaned close to her, pushing a lock of wild blond hair behind her ear then tracing his finger softly from her temple to her chin. He didn't even recognize himself. He'd never been brave enough to say these things to a girl. Even with Carly it had always been innuendo and flirting, never just laying it all out there. That's what Sam did to him. She made him brave.

Her blue eyes were shiny with tears she was trying not to cry and she hadn't yet said a word, but when she looked up at him from beneath her long lashes he felt his heart shatter and then mend itself in an instant; stronger than it had been the moment before and as it pounded in his ears he swore it was calling her name.

"I don't want to forget what happened Sam – none of it. I don't want to forget all the years you drove me crazy. I don't want to forget how special our first kiss was. I don't want to forget the last three months when you started to let me see who you really are. I don't want to forget yesterday. And I don't want to forget this moment, right now. You mean something to me Sam, and I want you in my life – as more than just my friend. So please don't ask me to forget Sam, because I don't think it's possible."

He moved to raise her face toward his again. He locked his eyes with hers, searching for any sign that she believed him. He needed her to believe him and when his words were met with silence he thought- for the first time since he'd begun talking -'maybe she doesn't feel the same way'. The idea sent cold fear like lightning down his spine.

Then the tears behind her eyes began running down her cheeks, and she didn't have to say anything. There was her answer.

He leaned forward tentatively, watching her face; gauging her reaction. He heard her breathing hitch, but she didn't stop him. He moved one hand to tangle in the soft waves of blond hair at the back of her neck; gently pulling her toward him. And this time when their lips met he knew exactly what to do. Moving with new found confidence, he pulled her close to him as he wrapped an arm around her waist.

She didn't want to kiss him back. She'd kissed guys before. Under bleachers, in basement closets during games. She'd done it just to do it. It hadn't really meant anything. But this…this kiss was supposed to mean something. There were promises in this kiss and if there was one thing that scared Samantha Puckett it was promises, because they were almost always broken. This was such a supremely bad idea, and she had about a million reasons why. It was going to change everything and she didn't know if she was ready for things to change; once they crossed this bridge, they couldn't go back. And what if he wasn't over Carly? He'd loved her, in all her Carly-like perfection, for as long as she'd known him. How could she compete with that? And the most important reason: he was a guy, a member of the male species and for most of her life all they'd ever done was disappoint her. She knew that Freddie believed what he'd said to her. She just didn't know how to make herself believe it too.

She tried to pull away from him, but her stupid body wasn't listening. And so for just one minute she stopped fighting. She tried to forget how many times she'd been disappointed. She tried to forget how many times she'd heard someone say they loved her only to have them walk away. She closed her eyes tight, leaned into Freddie and let herself believe him..

She kissed him back; with everything that she had. Their breathing was heavy as she raised her hands to grip his shoulders, hoping that he could feel all the words she couldn't say.

I've never felt like this before…

I've spent my whole life wondering if I mattered… if I was good enough…

She slid from the couch, pulling herself closer to him

You make me feel like I matter…

You make me want to stop hiding…

Freddie pulled his face away slowly, drawing her into his chest as he rested his chin on the soft blanket of her curls. They stayed that way. Sam, burying her face in his neck. Freddie, rubbing slow, lazy circles on the small of her back.

"Can I talk now" she said softly. He felt her smiling into his chest.

Freddie laughed as she move back to her seat on the sofa.

"I'm shocked you listened to me on that at all… when have you ever listened to someone when they told you to shut up?" He said, smiling up at her. Sam drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly, looking down at her hands.

"Freddie, what you said…just now. That was…" She stared at her hands, her lips slightly parted but no words coming out. Finally, she looked up at him, "I'm not good at this kind of stuff. This 'lovey- dovey' type of stuff. But ... I want you to know that this…she pointed her finger back and forth between the two of them, "this matters to me too. I don't want to forget either." She stopped again. 'Why was this so hard?' she thought. He'd just stood in front of her and said some of the nicest things she'd ever heard, and here she sat tongue tied and terrified.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is, I know that on paper you and I don't make much sense – or any sense really. We're like that thing… an oxy… oh what the heck is it called" she snapped her fingers trying to remember.

"An oxymoron" Freddie smiled.

"Exactly! That's exactly it. We're like two things that are totally opposite but somehow, together, they make sense. Like jumbo shrimp!" She quipped.

"Opposites attract" Freddie said.

"Exactly," Sam said, glad that he seemed to understand what she was saying, "But what if we stop making sense? What if we do this, and it ends bad and it ruins everything? What if you wake up one day and realize that … that I'm not enough; that I'm not what you really want? I don't think I could take that." She sighed,

She was scared. She'd never say it out loud, but he could tell. This entire situation was unfamiliar territory for her and he knew that. But he also knew how to fix it.

Freddie began looking around the room, finally moving over to dig through the movies in her TV stand.

"Hello? Did you hear what I said? I'm baring freakin' my soul here!" she said, a little irritated that while his confession had her crying like an infant, hers hadn't had quite the same effect.

"This will do just fine," Freddie said, coming back to sit in front of Sam, his hand holding something behind his back.

"What's the deal Benson?" Sam asked, trying to peek around his back.

Freddie withdrew a worn DVD case – 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre'.

"It's not the original," he smiled, "but it'll do. Now please raise your right hand" He held the case out in front of her solemnly.

"This is an important day," he started, "A day that will live on in infancy"

"The word is infamy, dorkus" Sam said, trying in vain to hold in her laughter.

"Infancy, Infamy, whatever Puckett! Just shut it before I change my mind!"

Sam sat up straight, placing her right hand on the worn DVD case, struggling to keep a straight face.

"Today, Princess Puckett, you are being officially inducted into the Puckett-Benson Society of Oxymoronic Love. Membership in this exclusive… by rule we are limited to two members" he laughed, "has only one requirement; that you promise... to stay just the way you are." He looked at her with a grin.

She took her hand from the case, looking at Freddie with questioning eyes and a hint of a smirk on her lips.

"You're sure about this" she asked.

"Absolutely" Freddie replied. Right now he couldn't think of anything she could say that would change his mind. Sam wasn't so sure…

"I'll never be a daffodil"

"I'm allergic to flowers"

"I'm not going to be all mushy in public"

"Mushy in private works fine for me"

"I still think Galaxy Wars is lame"

"Duly noted"

"Your mom is going to hate it"

"Probably"

"If you break my heart, I'll break your face"

"I wouldn't expect anything less"

"Well then Benson," she said placing her hand back onto the DVD case, "I do so swear"

He pulled her to her feet and with one arm around her tiny waist he drew her to him. Leaning down he whispered in her ear before brushing his lips with hers.

"Welcome to the club"


	4. Mum's the Word

She wasn't sure how long they'd been kissing. Five minutes…ten…longer? All she knew was that at some point they'd wound up in a very compromising position; lying on the sofa, impossibly close - a tangle of limbs. She felt like his hands were everywhere at once, and she was not complaining about it. She grabbed onto his shirt, pulling herself closer; she couldn't seem to get close enough. At some point this had gone from reasonably modest PG kissing to a full-blown make out session complete with ruffled hair and heavy breathing. She wondered to herself how far this was going to go. Freddie didn't seem to be slowing down and her thoughts were so fuzzy she couldn't think straight enough to make any rational decisions about anything.

She'd never done this with anyone else. She'd had kisses, some of them pretty steamy in fact, but always with her feet planted firmly on the ground - literally. She might have appeared "willing" to people looking at her from the outside but, in truth, the idea of getting this close to a guy, physically or emotionally, was terrifying to her. There were a lot of different ways these situations could turn out, and few of them were good. Her mom had never been the type to dole out advice but when it came to boys and sex, she had a lot to say; always reminding Sam of just how badly things could turn out if you went too far.

Once, when she'd been dating Jonah, she came home late after midnight bowling to find her mom waiting up for her on the couch. This was a rare occurrence, as her mother didn't ever seem to be very concerned with where Sam went and when she came home; if she came home at all. When Sam had attempted to tiptoe past her to go upstairs, her mom had sat up, and turned on the lights making Sam's attempt at evasion impossible.

"Where ya been?" she'd asked

"Since when do you care" Sam had replied, genuinely shocked at the question.

"Got yourself a little boyfriend, huh?" she'd asked, with a smirk on her face.

"What's it to you?" Sam asked. She knew how her mom felt about relationships; about the male species in general. Dirty, lying, cheating, leaving, no-good, can't be trusted, chumps. Use 'em, then lose 'em. She'd heard this on more than one occasion. She wouldn't have understood that Jonah was different. "We're just friends, and we were just out bowling" she replied. It wasn't exactly a lie. They had gone bowling. She left out the part about how happy Jonah made her, and how lucky she felt that he wanted to be her boyfriend. She also left out the part where he'd pulled her into a secluded corner by the back door, pressed her against the wall and kissed her until she couldn't remember her name.

"A friend, huh? Well, that always how it starts. One day he's your friend and the next you're in a hospital room screamin' your head off while trying to squeeze something the size of a watermelon out of a hole the size of a lemon. Your dad and I were friends once too ya know." Her eyes got a faraway look that she quickly replaced with a smirk. "And you see how that turned out. Enjoy your little friend while you can" she said, turning off the lights, "but don't count on him sticking around"

Sam stood silently. Her mom didn't mention her dad often, and even though he'd been gone since Sam was five years old, it stung to hear him mentioned. That's why she didn't talk about him; because it was impossible to do without revealing that it still hurt, that is still mattered. It was impossible to do without looking weak; and Puckett's weren't weak.

Her mom walked past her toward the back of the house, pausing as she entered her bedroom.

"And if you get knocked up…you're on your own" she said, slamming the door behind her.

"Great talk mom… we should do it again soon" she yelled after her mother, before running up the stairs to her room.

It had been almost unbearable when, two weeks later, she'd found out that Jonah had hit on Carly. Of course she never mentioned it to her mom, but it was still horrible to realize that she'd been right. Sam hadn't dated anyone since, unable to get her mother's voice out of her head, until now.

She could only imagine what her mom would have to say if she walked in on her and Freddie like this. Just the thought of it cleared her head enough to make her pull away from Freddie, who let out a groan of disappointment at the loss of contact.

"Is something wrong?" he half-whispered, propping himself up on an elbow; staring down at her.

As she opened her mouth to answer, Freddie's phone began to vibrate in his pocket. His eyes stayed on hers, waiting for an answer, as he reached into his pocket and silenced it with one hand. But whoever was calling was persistent and his phone rang again, and again… and again.

"Ugh" He cried out in frustration, sitting up to retrieve his phone from his pocket. His hormones were angry at the intrusion. Finally he and Sam and crossed the bridge from friends to… something much nicer and at this moment all he wanted was to be with her. He knew that at some point, they'd have to confront reality, but that could come later. Right now he wanted to exist in a world that was just the two of them.

He let out a frustrated groan, looking at his phone's screen. Sam rested her chin on his shoulder to see who was calling.

Carly.

"Back to the real world" He said, reluctantly. "I guess we can't just stay holed up in your house making out forever." 'As much as I'd like to' he thought.

Sam sighed, falling back against the sofa cushions, adjusting her shirt and running a hand through her messy curls.

"I really wish that this day could go on forever. But I think there's a lot we need to talk about." He said, turning to her.

She knew he was right. At the very least they should stop with the lip locks before it went further than they wanted it to. But talking wasn't the alternative she wanted. This afternoon had been a haze; an unexpected whirlwind of feelings – most of them wonderful. But if they started talking then it got real. Tucked away here, alone, in her house, she could pretend that the rest of the world didn't exist. She didn't have to worry about what people would say, or how awful it would feel if this whole thing went sour and blew up in their faces.

"Princess? Are you with me" Freddie asked, raising her chin with his hand so that she couldn't avoid his eyes.

Sam smiled and leaned forward into him, slipping her arms around his waist as she traced kisses along his jaw. Princess. He'd never called her just Princess before. It made her feel…safe.

"It's really hard to think, when you do that" Freddie breathed. Sam continued her path, moving toward his earlobe. 'Calculus…RF coaxial Ethernet cable…Gibby without his shirt' he tried to think of anything that would take his mind off what she was doing to him. She laughed softly into his ear.

"Gibby without a shirt? Really Benson? Momma's doing this for you and you're thinking about Gibby?"

Holy Chizz! Had he said that out loud? He knew they had to talk seriously, before they saw Carly. And there was no way he was going to be able to put together a coherent thought, let alone a plan if they kept doing this. He pulled back slowly, and reluctantly; turning toward Sam – who sat back with her arms folded across her chest.

"Alright Fredduccini…" she started

"Sam! I figured that now, after… well..this," he gestured between them, "that we'd move past the rude names."

"What? I wasn't being rude! I happened to really like fettuccini! It's my favorite pasta." She sat back, crossing her arms. "Besides," she pouted, "Paris wasn't built in a day"

"You mean Rome" he laughed.

"Paris, Rome… whatevs. I've been inventing names for you for years, you can't expect it to go away overnight. It's like a reflex. And…it means I'm thinking about you." She said finally, embarrassed to be revealing this to him. Other people had pet names, but the names she called Freddie meant just as much to her. It was something that no one else had for him, something only they shared.

Freddie chuckled. Okay, she'd won that round. He had a feeling that would be the case more often than not. Sam Puckett was not accustomed to losing.

"Seriously, Sam, we really need to discuss things…this…us," he reached for her hand and felt her tense. It was amazing that she could lie on this couch and let him touch her in ways he'd never touched any girl. They were hot and bothered and she had no problem with it. But as soon as he approached her softly, gently, she was immediately nervous …and afraid.

He traced tiny circles on the back of her hand, trying to comfort her.

"What's to talk about?" Sam said, avoiding his eyes, "You like me, and for some crazy reason I like you too. That's it… there's nothing else to talk about." She said firmly.

"Of course we have things to talk about Sam! Like … what does this mean? What are we doing? What do we want this to become?" His phone began ringing again and he extended it to Sam, "And this!" he said, showing her the log of missed calls and texts on his phone. "When are we going to tell Carly…and my mom? We need a plan." He let go of her hand and she stood and stretched lazily, scratching at the bare skin of her belly showing between the baggy pajama bottoms and the fitted tank top she was wearing. Even standing there, in nothing special, the sight of her drove him to distraction. He pulled his eyes away from her, studying his phone's screen.

"No, we do NOT need plan? Why would we need a plan? Why do they even have to know? Why does anyone need to know right now? I mean... we haven't even figured it all out ourselves."

'Why is he being such a girl about this', she thought. We like each other. We have fun together and she could get used to make out sessions like the one they'd just had. Going out and telling everyone right now just seemed like ... bad juju!

What if they told everyone and then in a week, or a month, one of them did something really stupid (which, let's just face it, was bound to happen) and it was over and then they had to explain everything to everyone and those stupid girls at school would walk around the halls talking about her. She hated when people talked about her. Nothing that was happening between them had anything to do with anyone else; and that was the way she liked it.

She looked down at Freddie, who was looking up at her with a crestfallen expression on his face.

"You don't want anyone to know that we're together." He said as a statement more than a question.

"Don't say it like that!" She said and sighed as she sat beside him. If they were going to be together she was going to have to get better at explaining what she meant. "It's not like I'm ashamed of you… or … of us…"

"Oh really?" Freddie questioned, his jaw tensed, "Because that's what it looks like from where I'm sitting."

"Ugh! Why are you making this so hard?" She asked.

"I'm not the one making it difficult Sam. I'm not the one who wants to hide. You want me to pretend that the greatest thing to happen to me since…well, since ever, doesn't exist!" He said evenly, "And no matter how difficult you think it would be to tell everyone about us... hiding it will be a hundred times harder!"

She studied his face and felt her heart constrict at what she saw there. His mouth was set in an angry line; jaw tensed. But his eyes… his eyes showed nothing but hurt. Dang it! She'd spent years hurting him on purpose, and now that hurting him was the furthest thing from her mind… she was doing it; and a thousand times worse than any punch she'd ever thrown at him.

She moved closer to him on the sofa, lifting his arm so that she could fit under it. She felt his chest relax.

"Think about iCarly. The show is important to all of us but if any of those Seddie and Creddie wahoos get wind of us being together it could change everything. They won't care about how good the show is or about just having fun watching us. It'll become 'The Sam and Freddie Show'. Do you really want that?" she asked quietly, taking a deep breath before continuing.

"I'm not ashamed of you. I like you and me together and I'm glad that all of this has happened. But you have to admit… this is really new for us. Six months ago I was threatening you and hitting you. Now we're making out on my couch! It's sort of a lot to take in." She paused, "And you're right Freddie… hiding is hard. But that's not what I'm saying we should do; not exactly. I just want the time to get used to this before we go shouting it from the rooftops and making ourselves public property." She reached for his hand and entwined their fingers together, "Can't it be just us? Just for a little while longer?"

Freddie looked down into her eyes and waited a minute, to make her think that he at least gave it some thought before giving her what she wanted when, in all truthfulness, she'd had him at 'I'm not ashamed of you'. He knew that she had a point, but he couldn't help but worry just how long 'a little while longer' would be.

"Alright Sam. We'll do it your way for now. But we can't go on like this forever. At some point people are going to get suspicious. They'll figure it out on their own. You how mad do you think Carly is will be if she has to find out on her own instead of hearing it from us?" He said. "How do you expect to keep this from her? If I hold your hand or kiss you in front of her I think she might figure it out" he laughed

"You said mushy in private was just fine with you" Sam said

He could kick himself right now. If he was within a hundred feet of her he was going to want to touch her. He wondered how many more of his words he was going to have to eat.

"Freddie," she started, "you are looking at one of the best liars in Seattle – maybe even the world!" She said

"Not something to be proud of Samantha" he said

"Myeah" she said, hitting him lightly on the arm, "all I'm saying is that keeping this from Carly and your mom and everyone else is just a matter of a few very well told …half-truths" she said

"Lies you mean?

"No… I mean half-truths. For instance; when you go home Carly will say 'Freddie have you seen Sam' to which you will say, "I texted her earlier, but she didn't text me back", then pull out your phone and look all interested in it and ask her if she's seen me. She'll be too distracted to notice that you didn't answer the question. Plus, you did text me, and I didn't text you back. That's not a lie. You just don't mention that there was no need to text me back because you were already spending the better part of Saturday afternoon with your tongue down my throat." She sat back with a self-satisfied smile.

"Okay, so what do we say when she asks us about the kiss at the lock-in?" He asked, sure he'd gotten her this time.

"That one's easy. I'll talk to her before you do. I'll tell her that I kissed you but you didn't respond because…" she paused; thinking, "Because you're not completely over her!" she looked up to gauge his reaction, silently praying that her statement was only half true. "See! It's not exactly a lie, when I kissed you, you did sort of stand there like a nub." She laughed. "When she asks you about it, just stick to the script – I kissed you, you didn't respond, you're not over her. Got it?"

Freddie frowned, shaking his head.

"Sam…I really don't like that plan." He said.

"What do you mean?" she said, "The plan is genius!"

"No it's not!" he said, turning to peer down into her eyes, "It's not genius at all." He paused. "You and I both know that I liked Carly for a long time. Realizing we weren't mean to be together and getting over her wasn't exactly easy" he said

"You were foreign bacon." Sam stated simply

"Thank you Sam, I think we've established that" he said, "The point is that I am over her. I am completely and totally over her Sam. I want you, more than I ever wanted Carly. More than I've ever wanted anyone. So even pretending to still want Carly isn't an option." He finished, looking in her eyes.

What could she say to that? He wanted to be with her, enough to not even consider a pretend crush. She didn't know if she could ever be happier than she was in this moment.

"So what do you suggest?" she asked.

Freddie sat still; eyes squished, lips pursed – it was his thinking face.

"How about this? We tell her that I said I couldn't be with you for the sake of all of our friendships" Sam looked at him questioningly, "I mean; we could say that I just thought it was best if there were no romantic involvements between any of us."

Sam sat quietly as a smile crept slowly across her face.

"You know what? I think that might actually work!" She said, "And you thought of it all by yourself. Momma is rubbin' off on you" she laughed, clapping her hands together.

"Really? You're agreeing with me?" he said in shock.

"Yeah! And we've been sort of sneaking around for the last three months anyway. So the only difference is that we'll have to be a little more careful. And sometimes when we sneak around we'll do this..." she said, wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him down to their original position.

He shook his head in amazement and wrapped himself around her; smiling into her kiss. She really had an answer for everything. And what she was suggesting just might work. He still didn't want to hide or sneak around. He wanted everyone to know that she was his; that he loved all loud, crazy, violent 100 pounds of Sam Puckett…and just maybe she loved him too. But he knew that the idea of them being together still scared her, so he was willing to go slow if it meant that she'd stay with him, despite her fear.

"Whatever you say Princess Puckett," he laughed, "whatever you say."

Carly paced back and forth in her kitchen, staring at the screen of her Pear Phone. She'd been texting Sam and Freddie every hour on the hour since she got up this morning. Sam was usually at her house early on Sundays since that was the day Spencer made pancakes and bacon… with extra bacon for Sam. When breakfast had come and gone with no sign of her Carly had started calling; her calls went straight to voicemail.

When she couldn't get a hold of Sam, she started trying Freddie. Again, no answer, and no sign of him either. She'd even gone over to his house where she was met by the disapproving face of his mother who quickly informed her that he had left early to study at the library. She'd tried to thank Mrs. Benson and ask her to have Freddie call when he got back but the door was unceremoniously slammed in her face. That woman had issues for sure!

So now she stood in her kitchen, trying to take her mind off of her two best friends whom she'd witnessed making out, only to have them both go M.I.A. Freddie had come over right after the lock in but only stayed long enough to drop Spencer onto the sofa and grab his tech equipment from Brad before shooting out the door; throwing a 'see you later Carly', over his shoulder. She'd tried to go after him but had been stopped by Brad…who had said he needed to talk to her, and Gibby who kept asking her who she'd seen kissing at the lock in.

After she'd told Gibby that no one had been kissing he left quickly. That left her and Brad, sitting on her sofa in awkward silence.

"So… that was some night, huh?" Brad had said, nervously playing with the strap of his backpack.

"Yeah," Carly offered, "It was definitely one to remember." If he only knew the half of it, she thought. "So you wanted to talk to me?"

"Oh… yeah, I guess I did." He paused, staring at his feet, "The thing is that… the real reason I wanted to be an intern on iCarly was because I've liked you ever since I moved here. I mean… I know we haven't talked much but you just seem so cool, and I'd really like to get to know you." He looked up at Carly," So I was wondering if you might want to maybe go out sometime…you know… like on a date… with me" he stuttered.

Carly blushed at the attention and smiled at Brad. Last night she would have had to say no, but now that she was sure the MoodFace app was wrong and Sam didn't like Brad, she saw no reason to turn him down. He really was adorable, and she hadn't noticed until just now what nice eyes he had.

"Uh… sure Brad. I mean, I'd love to. I just… you don't think it will make things weird… for iCarly I mean?" she asked.

"I don't see why it has to" Brad said. He didn't mention his theories on Sam and Freddie, but if he was right, sooner or later, he and Carly wouldn't be the only iCarly crew members dating. "Freddie's cool and I don't think Sam will care… as long as I keep bringing her fudge." He laughed and Carly joined him.

"Winning Sam over with food… you know her pretty well already I see" Carly said

She and Brad had spent another hour or so just talking and watching TV. As it turned out, Brad had a military family background like hers. His father was a commander in the Navy, assigned to Everett Naval Station, just north of Seattle. While Carly had been able to have a relatively stable life by living with Spencer – house fires and weird food notwithstanding, Brad had moved around a lot as a kid. He was hoping that this time they'd stay in one place until he graduated.

While they sat together she tried to text Sam and Freddie, inconspicuously, but Brad kept catching her and asking who she was texting. She finally just gave up and enjoyed her time with him. Spencer had walked in after an hour and asked if they wanted to come down to the Groovy Smoothie with him but Brad declined saying he needed to get home. Before he left they made plans to go to the movies that weekend. Carly's only request was that it not be a horror movie.

That was yesterday, when her worry had been mild compared to the full, blown tornado of rage she was feeling now! How dare Sam and Freddie not contact her? Yesterday she could say that maybe they'd been busy and not able to contact her; but it had been a full 24 hours; the longest she and Sam had gone without talking since the 'Fleck & Dave' incident. Still there had been no contact at all from Sam or Freddie.

As a rule, Carly avoided going to Sam's house. It was not that the house wasn't nice, it was, in an older sort of way. And it wasn't the neighborhood, which wasn't the best but she certainly wasn't going to get mugged in broad daylight there. It was totally Sam's mom. Pam Puckett made the skin on the back of her neck stand up. Being around her was like sitting on the city bus next to someone who looked capable of murder – you were pretty sure they wouldn't actually do it right there on the bus...but you'd still feel better when their stop came up.

'Oh well, desperate times call for desperate measures', she thought. Grabbing her jacket off the hook by the door and scribbling a quick note to Spencer, she yanked the door open and stopped short.

"Hey Carlotta… am I too late for Bacon Sunday?"

Standing in her doorway, looking so nonchalant it made Carly's blood boil, was Sam. Carly grabbed the front of her shirt and pulled her, forcefully into the apartment.

"Whoa… Slow down there Shay! Where's the fire?" Sam managed to choke out.

"Don't you tell me whoa! How dare you whoa me!" Carly screeched. "Where have you been! I've been calling you since yesterday and you didn't call me back! Or text! Or come over!" She shook a finger in Sam's face, "NO BACON FOR YOU!"

Sam tried not to laugh. She knew that Carly would be bent out of shape about her and Fredwardo going missing yesterday. She just didn't think it'd be this bad. Carly was known to get bent out of shape pretty easily, but it was never this funny!

"I'm sorry…Geez!" Sam said, trying to quell the laughter. If she kept laughing, she wouldn't sound believable when she told Carly the "truth" about her and Freddie. And it was really important that Carly believe her. She hated to lie to Carly but, in Sam's mind, she didn't have a choice. Carly was hurt so easily when it came to her friends and while she may be mad at her and Freddie when she found out that they'd lied, she wouldn't stay mad. But if Sam spilled all the beans now and Carly got all excited, only to watch Sam and Freddie break up… that would hit her harder; and might ruin their friendship forever. Nope, there wasn't a choice. She had to do it.

Sam drew in a deep breath and flopped down onto the sofa, fixing her face into a melancholy stare.

"I just wasn't ready to talk about….it, yet" she said, sadly.

'Uh, oh' Carly thought. This couldn't be good. Sam didn't really get sad about boys, at least not the way Carly did. If Carly had a breakup or a broken heart she crawled under the covers with a carton of ice cream and cried through a day's worth of sappy movies. The last time a boy had disappointed Sam, she'd hooked his underwear to the wedgie bounce and laughed her head off while eating a sandwich and watching the whole debacle stream live on the internet. It wasn't like her to get all sad looking and stare off into space. Seeing her getting upset over a boy…over Freddie no less, was strange. This wasn't some random crush, and the MoodFace app hadn't been wrong. Sam was in love….with Freddie!

Carly moved to sit beside her. "So… what happened" She asked

"You mean before I kissed the dork… or after?" She asked Carly, without looking at her, "Guess it doesn't matter which one. They both turned out crab."

Carly grabbed for Sam's hand.

"Aw, come on Sam. It can't be that bad, can it?" She was almost scared to hear the answer and suddenly more than a little worried at why Freddie was missing.

"He turned me down kid," she said, looking away from Carly, "turned me down flat. But at least he was nice enough not to do it in front of everyone"

"Wait," Carly said, shocked, "What do you mean he turned you down? I saw you kissing! And you've both been acting all weird lately and spending time together! And the MoodFace app said you were in love… I don't understand" Carly said.

"Yeah, the MoodFace app said I was in love. Not Fredhead. And what you saw was me kissing him…and him not responding" Sam said.

"Aw, Sam. I'm really sorry. I thought for sure… I mean I really thought that…" Carly got quiet.

"You thought we were off somewhere together, ignoring your calls – making out and all that chizz?" Sam laughed and Carly realized; that the thought had crossed her mind more than once today, each time she'd shrugged it off as crazy talk. "Sorry to disappoint you Carly, but it's not going to happen. He was really nice about it – made me want to punch him in the throat! He was all 'blah, blah, blah…we're friends. And blah, blah, blah…I don't want to ruin that and yada, yada, yada…After Carly I don't think it's a good idea for any of us to be 'romantically' involved."

"Wait a minute… what!" Carly exclaimed, dropping Sam's hand, "he said what?"

"He it's a bad idea for him to be involved with either of us." Sam said, lowering her head. "Maybe he's just saying it because he thinks there's still a chance with you." she offered, "There isn't is there?"

She knew it was wrong and that she'd told Freddie she wouldn't go this route, but she couldn't help herself. She just wanted to see what Carly's reaction would be. To see if there was any part of her that might entertain the idea of being with Freddie.

Carly got quiet, blowing air out of her mouth slowly while leaning back against the sofa. This was bad, even worse than she thought. What if Freddie was still in love with her? What if she'd ruined Sam's chances of being with him? This really sucked.

"I don't think he's in love with me." She said, " and even if he was, that ship has sailed!"

Sam swung her feet over the arm of the sofa and laid her head in Carly's lap, like she always did when she was upset.

"Really Carls, it's okay" Sam said.

"No Sam! It's not okay. I mean, I was the one who told you to make a move and take a chance and look what happened! I feel like all of this is my fault!"

"Calm down, " Sam said, "It's really not that big a deal. Once I got home, took a nap and washed my mouth out with soap I felt much better. It wouldn't have worked between me and Seniorita Whizpants anyway. It's cool. He was nice about it so at least I didn't have to beat him. And it might be weird for a little while but it'll be fine eventually." She tried to reassure Carly, who was, at the present staring at the television with an angry look on her usually happy face.

Both girls lapsed into silence. Carly sat wondering what she could do to fix this. Obviously Freddie had no intentions on being with Sam. Sam had kissed him and even then he'd rejected her. Maybe he just needed to see what he was missing. A small smile crossed her face as she thought of all the ways she could help that happen.

"You know what Sam?" she said, "Any boy who would turn you down is obviously dumb… and blind. Freddie's my friend, but maybe he's not the guy for you. So now we just need to find the one that is" she finished a mischievous glint in her brown eyes.

Sam had told Freddie that fooling Carly would be easy. She'd tell Carly, Carly would be sad for her, then in three or four months Sam and Freddie would tell her the truth and hopefully she'd be too busy celebrating to be mad at them. She'd been right, partially. Fooling Carly had actually been easier than she thought, but she had a feeling that the outcome wouldn't be quite as simple as she imagined. Carly looked so upset, and hurt… for Sam and her imaginary heartbreak over Freddie, enough so to try to 'fix it'. And when Carly tried to fix things they had a tendency to go bad…real bad. For the first time that day Sam wished she had just listened to Freddie.

What had she gotten them into?


	5. The Fallout

Sam and Carly spent the rest of Sunday afternoon in their typical fashion, Sam cleaning out the fridge and Carly exhaustively discussing the current boy she liked – this time it was Brad. As much as Sam loved Carly, she had learned more about Brad in the last 2 hours that she cared to know… and he and Carly hadn't even been on a date yet; she had a feeling Carly was going to fall hard for this kid.

But that wasn't the only reason she couldn't seem to concentrate. She was used to Carly prattling on about boys and makeup and other girly stuff and normally she was able to pay attention for most of it. But that was before yesterday. It seemed as if she'd need to categorize all her thoughts and feelings as either B.F. (before Freddie) or A.F (after Freddie). Since their rather heated encounter on Sam's sofa, her already short attention span had taken a nose dive; she couldn't concentrate on anything. At random times throughout the day she'd get a vivid flashback and she was suddenly caught in a dreamy haze.

This morning she actually woke up with a dopey grin on her face and it took her a full minute to realize that it hadn't all been a dream. Then she'd gotten a text from Freddie…

Freddison: GM Princess… goin 2 bacon Sunday?

Sam: Don't wanna

Freddison: ur turning dwn free bacon? R u sick?

Sam: Vry funny…

Freddison: ur gonna tell her 2day right

Sam: Yep

Freddison: Good luck

Sam: Won't need it… piece of cake

Freddison: text me when ur done?

Sam: u got it… l8r

After she and Carly had talked, Sam had gone into the bathroom to check her messages away from Carly's watchful eyes. She knew Freddie had to be wondering how it went and she was not surprised to see 3 messages from him.

Freddison: How did it go

Freddison: R u still there?

Freddison: ?

She laughed at his nervousness. He really needed to have a little more faith in her.

Sam: Don't get ur undies in a bunch! She bought it… momma told ya she would

Freddison: Really?

Sam: Yep. Maybe a little 2 well…

Freddison: ?

Sam: I'll explain l8r

Freddison: When r u leaving there?

Sam: Soon…y?

Freddison: Mom's working til midnight

Sam: nuf said hotlips…c u soon. R u cooking?

Freddison: hotlips?

Sam: :p

She'd jammed her phone into her pocket and turned to leave; her mind racing with potential excuses to get her out of there and across the hall. She returned to the sofa where Carly was flipping through a magazine.

"What's all this?" Sam asked, pointing to the piles of magazines that surrounded her.

"Research." Carly said, "Prom is right around the corner...we don't have much time to prepare," she said, not even looking up from the page.

School dances weren't really Sam's thing, so it was no surprise that she'd forgotten. It was also no surprise that Carly would take it this seriously. She vaguely remembered Carly bringing it up over the past few months, telling Sam they needed to find dresses and come up with dates. Sam had just figured she'd borrow a dress from Carly and go stag, if she went at all. But now her situation with Freddie made this a little trickier.

Prom was notoriously a 'couples' event. Technically, she was a couple, or part of a couple at least, but no one was supposed to know that. So getting all dressed up and walking arm and arm with Freddie into prom was out of the question, especially now that Carly thought Sam was nursing a broken heart because Freddie rejected her. Somewhere in her head Sam had figured that they could keep this whole thing under wraps at least until summer began. Then they could tell Carly but wouldn't really have to deal with a school full of people sticking their nose into her business for another 3 months.

She wasn't sure what to do now. If Carly didn't take a date it might work out. Then they could all three go together…no pressure. But if she got snuggled up to Brad and they went together it would be entirely too weird for her and Freddie to go with them. Skipping the damn thing all together was sounding better and better.

"Sam!" Carly said, "Are you even listening to me?"

"Sorry Carls." Sam said, "did you say something?"

"I said I've got the perfect plan." Carly turned to Sam on the sofa

"Plan?" Sam questioned

"Ugh… you really weren't listening! I've got the perfect plan to get Freddie to see how wrong he is!" Her eyes twinkled mischievously as looked at Sam.

Crap. Sam knew Carly's propensity for meddling. But the look on Carly's face said she was about to go into meddling overdrive.

"Carls, you don't need to do that. Really. I'm okay. I don't need to 'seek revenge' on Freddie. Let's just drop it." She said, hoping that, for once, Carly would listen when someone told her to butt out.

"Of course we need to do something! You're in love with the guy and he's being a boob!" Carly said.

"I'm not in love!" Sam said defensively. She wasn't in love, was she?

"Okay…you're not in love" Carly said, her word full of sarcasm, "but since when are you not up for a good old revenge plan? What's gotten into you?" she laughed.

"Nothing!" Sam said, "I just…I just don't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he hurt me, that's all". God she hoped that sounded more believable to Carly than it had to her.

"Trust me Sam! It's going to be fine. When we get done with Freddie, he won't know what hit him!" She said.

"I thought the nub was your friend? Why would you want to stick it to him? I mean, he turned me down, not you." Sam replied.

"I'm not sticking it to him… exactly." Carly said, "I'm just helping him see the error of his ways" she said. 'And making sure the two of you end up together' she thought to herself.

When Carly set her mind to something she was like a runaway freight train, just as destructive but harder to stop. This situation was going south…fast!

"Listen Carly," Sam said, "I'd love to sit here and help you with your evil plots -you know how much I love evil plots – but there is a ham at my house that is calling my name," she said, standing from the sofa. Carly followed her to the door.

"Tomorrow we begin Phase One of 'Operation Make Him Pay'. I'll text you the details.

'I'm in for a whole batch of 'I told you so' from Freddie,' Sam thought to herself.

"Alright Shay." Sam said, "Mañana." She walked to the elevator, waving at Carly as she shut the door. She took the elevator all the way to the lobby, just in case. From the lobby she texted Freddie to let him know to unlock his door; she didn't have to risk discovery while waiting for him to answer it. She waited a full minute before taking the elevator back to the 8th floor, creeping quickly and quietly past the Shays' door before opening Freddie's.

"Hey Fre…" Her greeting was interrupted as she was backed into the wall, Freddie's body holding her there as his lips met hers. Instinctively she reached up to thread her hands through his hair, matching the intensity of his kiss enthusiastically. She wondered if this would ever get old. If she'd ever get used to the way kissing him left her heart racing and her body hot.

Freddie placed one hand on the wall beside them, effectively barring her exit – as if she'd have been considering it. His other arm went around her waist, his hand travelling slowly from the small of her back to the top of the jeans hugging her hips. His mouth left hers and began to trail down her neck.

"So… I guess you missed me," she said, her breath hitching as he nibbled at the hollow of her neck. She was pleasantly surprised at this reversal in positions – Freddie, who normally took directions, was setting the pace and while she wasn't exactly sure where he was leading them, she was a willing follower.

"Yeah." He paused, laughing softly in her ear, "a little bit."

He pulled away from her and grabbed her hand, leading her to the sofa. He sat on the end while Sam sprawled out; feet on the arm rest, head in his lap. He stared down and her and couldn't help but smile. God he was crazy about this girl.

"Why are staring at me like the village idiot?" Sam laughed

"No reason. Aren't I allowed to look at my girlfriend?" He smiled

"Less lookin' and more kissin', Benson." With that she pulled his face down to meet hers and gave him a kiss that was the stuff of a teen boy's dreams… very special dreams. It almost scared him, the way he felt when they were together like this. It was like heat in his veins, a slow fog filling his mind making him oblivious to anything that wasn't her. He couldn't get enough. But that's not the part that scared him most. It was the way he felt when they weren't like this. The way he felt the need to be near her, how his hands ached to touch her. The way his heart skipped a beat when he heard her voice. The way she could look at him and make him forget that there was anyone else in the room. These were all new feelings for him. And they were overwhelming.

He hadn't realized that he'd stopped kissing her at some point and now was hovering inches from her face, tracing the line of her jaw with his thumb. She really was beautiful. She was smiling at him, no doubt getting ready to make a remark – again – about how girly he was being.

"Tell me what you're thinking" she said.

"I'm thinking lots of things"

"Yeah, some more obvious than others" she laughed, squeezing his thigh, "but seriously, what are thinking about?"

He sighed and sat back on the sofa. Sam raised her head from his lap and turned to sit Indian style beside him.

Truth be told, he really was thinking about a lot of things. And he wasn't sure if Sam was ready to hear them right now. He noticed that just referring to her as his 'girlfriend' made her tense up. What would she say if told her everything he was feeling? As he saw it, he had two options: tell the unvarnished truth, or tell a slightly less candid version of the truth.

"I'm thinking that your hair smells like vanilla. And that I can smell bacon on your fingertips." He grabbed her hand, kissing her fingertips before threading their hands together. "I'm thinking that it's so cute the way you blush when I kiss you." Not exactly a lie-he was thinking those things. And here went nothing: "And I'm thinking that…I love you."

Over the course of his years spent as the best friend of two girls, he'd been forced to watch his fair share of chick flicks. More than once he'd heard them talk about 'time standing still'. It had always made him mad. It was a scientific impossibility. Time could not literally stand still. Carly and Sam would always shush him when he tried to bring that fact to their attention, telling him that he just didn't understand. Now he knew they'd been right. He hadn't understood then, but he got it now. The thirty seconds following his declaration to Sam seemed not even to pass. The only sound he heard was the thudding of his racing heart. The only movement, his eyes as they searched Sam's for a reaction. She sat, silent and unmoving.

He wished she'd say something. Do something. He suddenly realized this is how she must have felt at the lock-in. He started to wonder if she'd even heard him.

Sam reached into the front pocket of her jeans and pulled out her phone. Okay. That was not the reaction he'd expected.

"Sam?" He leaned toward her, trying to get her to look at him. It didn't work. "Sam, did you hear me? Did you hear what I just said?"

Sam paused, still no expression on her face, before beginning to text on her phone.

This was definitely not the reaction he'd expected. Tears, hugs, kisses. 'I love you too Freddie's. That would have been nice. Punches, cursing, slamming doors. That would have been awful, but at least it would have been something. But he'd declared his love and she'd…started texting someone? That was just rude…even for Sam.

She finished texting, stood from the sofa and stated walking toward the door.

"Sam!" Freddie said, "Wait a minute! Where the hell do you think you're going?"

Sam kept walking, her eyes on her phone, ignoring or unhearing he wasn't sure. When she reached the door she took a final glance at her phone, pressed a button and opened the door.

"Sam!" He said

Her blond head peaked back in, this time a small smile played on her lips.

"Check your phone hotlips." With that she shut his door quietly, probably for fear of the Shays hearing her.

Freddie's phone began to vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out and saw a message from Sam. He laughed out loud when he read it. This girl was going to be the death of him for sure.

Sam: Me too…

It was official. He was in love with Samantha Joy Puckett. And she loved him too.


	6. Like a Ninja

** Sam **

This must be what it feels like to be a ninja.

When I was little, before my dad left, he'd let me watch martial arts movies with him and I was always psyched about the ninjas. The way they could sneak around, unnoticed, and break some poor sap's face before he even knew what hit him. Way cool.

This week Freddie and I have officially reached ninja status. If they gave out awards for stealth and cunning we'd win for sure. All we're missing is the black masks and the cool weapons.

** Freddie **

Seven days. That's how long it's been. Seven days of really hot kisses… in really strange places. Tuesday I got a text in the middle of third period that said to meet Sam in the equipment room at the back of the gym. It smelled like unwashed sweat socks, which was gross. But Sam wore cherry flavored lip gloss, which was awesome! Wednesday she grabbed me from behind and pulled me into the janitor's closet on my way to Media Arts. I missed the beginning of the lecture on hyperrealistic effects because I was in the closet with Sam, and the end of the lecture because I was having vivid flashbacks of … being in the closet with Sam.

Thursday was the abandoned hall by the band room before first bell. And the elevator after school. And the fire escape …for old time's sake. So, um, yeah … Thursday was a good day. I have to admit, there is a certain hotness to this whole 'sneaking around thing', even if it sucks to keep such a big secret from the people I care about...people like Carly. But Sam's with me… really with me, and she's happier now than I've ever seen her. I don't want to mess that up. Plus, like Sam says, what Carly doesn't know can't hurt her.

** Carly **

Something is going on. I just know it. They way Sam and Freddie are acting is just…weird. And I live with Spencer… I'm an expert on weird! Spencer says it's probably all in my head; that I'm being "girly" and imagining things. At first I thought that maybe he was right.

I got to school Monday, ready to activate 'Operation Make Him Pay' but with Sam saying she wasn't interested I thought 'Maybe she's just hurt', 'maybe she doesn't want to make a big deal over Freddie rejecting her'.

On Wednesday, when she disappeared in the middle of third period, then appeared twenty minutes later with a big dopey smile and smeared lip gloss, I thought 'she was probably just out at her locker, having her mid-morning sandwich'. Ham does make her smile.

On Thursday I spent half the day trying to get her attention while she smiled ridiculously at her cell phone… looking at text messages she wouldn't let me read. She said they were from her mom. Since when does anything about Sam's mom make her happy? And after school when we all went to the Groovy Smoothie, Freddie bought her a smoothie. A large one! Without her threatening him or, for that matter, even asking him to do it! And do you know what Sam said to him? _Thank you!_ Not one wisecrack! What the heck kind of alternate universe am I living in!

** Sam **

Lately I feel like I went to sleep and woke up in an alternate universe. A crazy, mixed up world where Samantha Puckett and Fredward Benson are a disgustingly cute couple. A real couple that holds hands (behind closed doors at least) and has inside jokes and pet names and secrets. We've especially got the secret part down.

At first Freddie was all nervous about it. I know he thinks I don't want people to know about us. Sometimes I think he might even be afraid that I'm ashamed to be with him. But that isn't true. I'm happier being with Freddie that I could ever tell him. It's sort of like one of those prissy pants fairy tales Carly's always going on about. Only I'm not making fun of this one because for the first time, I get to be the princess. But the problem with fairy tales is that they always end. And in my experience, most of them don't end in happily ever after.

Don't get me wrong. I wish that I could tell everyone I know that I'm with Freddie. I wish that we could walk into school, holding hands and I could tell all those girls whispering behind our backs to bite me. But I just can't do it.

For some crazy reason the kid loves me, or thinks he does anyway. And when we're alone, he looks at me like I'm the only girl in the world. He tells me that I'm special, and important and he hasn't once asked me to stop being who I am. But it's only been seven days. And most of those days were spent in a hormone induced haze. So what happens when the fog lifts? What happens when the cackling hens at school find out and start to point out all the things about me that aren't so wonderful? What happens when his mother finds out and forbids him from being with a girl like me? If I tell the world, I'll lose him for sure. Simple as that.

** Carly **

It should be simple. Get Sam and Freddie alone, tell them that I know something's going on with them and force them to tell me the truth. But it's just not working out that way. First of all I can hardly ever get them alone. And when I do, I always get interrupted.

Before school, after school ... during school! There's always someone around. When we went to the Groovy Smoothie I thought I'd finally get the chance. But just when I opened my mouth to say 'who the heck do you two think you're fooling?,' T-Bo walked by, offering us apples… on a stick of course. By the time he got the point that we did not want his stinky stick apples, it was time to get ready for iCarly.

I am going to get to the bottom of this. The days of their little secret are numbered!

** Freddie **

In 5…4…3…2…

_ I'm a girl with a web show! _

_ I'm her quirky sidekick! _

_ And you're the yahoo's watching us! _

_ Welcome to another exciting episode of… iSmell Like Cheese! _

_ That's not the name of our show Sam _

_ No, she's right it's not _

_ This is iCarly! _

_ Where the only thing that smells… is our resident tech-head Freddie! Say hello Fredweird! _

Freddie smiled; this was part of their cover but he had to say, he sort of missed the insults…how crazy was that?

** Sam **

I was going crazy. I spent all of iCarly being 'normal', trying to remember to throw just the right amount of insults at Freddie. Trying to groan when he made goofy comments. Trying not to notice how his biceps flexed when he hoisted the camera up on his shoulder. And really trying not to let Carly catch me staring at him. But iCarly went off without a hitch. My reputation for biting insults was still intact, and Carly was still blissfully unaware. Why, you ask? Because Mama is good!

When we wrapped for the night Freddie said he had to run to an emergency A/V club meeting. A meeting I knew was a complete fable. We'd already decided to meet at his place after iCarly since his mom was working late. Freddie would leave for his 'meeting' and I would follow an inconspicuously short time later.

After Freddie left I helped Carly clean up from 'Hey, What Am I Sitting On?'. Tonight's segment had been Brad, sitting on tuna balls. Right now he was down stairs in Carly's bathroom, probably trying to get mushed tuna off his pants.

I fielded some very weird questions from Carly before I left. Like who'd been texting me so much lately (I told her it was my mom), and why she saw Freddie putting a note in my locker (I told her I asked to borrow his history notes), when she started yammering on about why I'd started wearing panties all of the sudden I took that as my cue to leave. On the way out I said goodbye to Brad, then headed over to Freddie's.

It's so simple. I can't believe we were ever worried. Just like ninjas. Show no fear. Leave no evidence.

** Carly **

Evidence! I have evidence! Sam has been undone by her obsessive love of Fatcakes.

After avoiding all my questions she left the studio, leaving me to clean up the rest of the tuna mush off the floor. I grabbed the last bag of trash and got ready to head downstairs when I noticed that she'd left her back pack by the elevator. I ran downstairs, hoping to catch her before she left and got downstairs just in time to hear her tell Brad to tell me she had to run and she'd talk to me tomorrow. Or at least I think that's what she said. Who can understand someone with a mouth full of Fatcake?

I called out to her but the front door had already shut. I told Brad and Spencer I was going to try to catch up with Sam to give back her backpack. I figured I might be able to catch her in the lobby but when I got downstairs there was no one around… unless you count Lewbert…and his wart.

"Hey Lewbert" I said

"What do you want Polly Perkypants!" He screamed

"Stop being rude!"

"Stop loitering in my lobby!"

"I just wanted to ask if you'd seen Sam come through here?"

"No, I haven't seen your loud, rude, little friend. Not since the two of you came tromping in here earlier. Now unless you have more idiotic questions to ask I need to go put ointment on my wart!"

Lewbert stormed into his office and I stood in shock, staring at his closed door.

He said he hadn't seen Sam. Which meant she couldn't have come downstairs and left the building, Lewbert would have noticed, he noticed everything. So if Sam hadn't left the building… there was only one place she could be. I ran to the elevator and punched the button for the eighth floor.

When the door opened I couldn't get to Freddie's door fast enough. Finally! Sam and Freddie were behind this door, doing God knows what, and damn it… they were going to admit to it. Now!

I banged on the door. No answer.

I banged harder. No answer

I yelled both their names and told them in no uncertain terms that they had better answer the door. No answer.

The door to my apartment opened and the heads of Brad and Spencer peeked out, in his hand Spencer held a bent golf club.

"Carly! What's going on out there?" Spencer said, looking anxious.

"Nothing! I'm just trying to get Sam and Freddie to open the door!"

"Sam and Freddie? Sam at Freddie's house?" Spencer asked

"Yes, and before you ask, I cannot give you the 'deets' because I don't have any

'deets' to give, because they won't open the door!" I said, and returned to banging.

"Seriously Carly, if you keep banging on the door like that someone's going to call the police" Brad said. He was looking at me like I had three heads. "Besides, you don't know that Sam is over there. You don't even know if Freddie is over there. And banging on Freddie's door like that looks a little…crazy?"

Great, not only are my best friends being sneaky liars… now my almost boyfriend thinks I'm crazy.

I sighed and turned from the door, walking back to my apartment.

That's when it happened. Proof…sweet, sweet proof.

My foot slipped on something right outside Freddie's door and when I looked down, I saw it.

A Fatcake wrapper. But not just any Fatcake wrapper. As I bent down to pick it up I realized that on the wrapper was a tiny pink post-it note.

_ Princess Puckett, _

_ The snacks you love. _

_ For the girl I love. _

_ -Freddie _

Busted.


	7. Rumor Has It

The door slammed shut behind her, echoing in the apartment. She'd just walked Brad downstairs. They were going on their first official date on Saturday. He wouldn't tell her where. He'd just told her to dress nice and bring her appetite. Carly wasn't usually one for surprises but she loved the idea that he was going to come up with something all on his own; she was liking him more and more.

At first meeting she'd thought he was nice, even cute, but he'd struck her as a little… well…boring. Carly was a stereotypical girl in that way; a "good girl" who liked bad boys. But the last few days with Brad were showing her that there was more to him than she'd first thought. She really liked him… and she was pretty sure he felt the same way.

And if he still wanted to hang out with her, after how crazy she'd looked today, then he was definitely a keeper. She groaned and put her face in her hands. She really had looked kind of nuts standing in the hallway screaming threats and banging on Freddie's door. But what else was she supposed to do?

Spencer walked into the living room holding a giant plastic tub. "Hey kid. You alright?" He asked, struggling to talk as he carried the tub over to the sofa.

"Yeah. No. Ugh. I don't know!" she said, walking into the kitchen for a Wahoo Punch "What's in the tub?"

Spencer groaned as he dropped the tub to the floor.

"About a hundred pounds of Fun-Goo"

"Fun-Goo? Do I want to know  _why_  you have a hundred pounds of Fun-Goo?"

"Of course you do, because you, my sweet little sister, are about to witness history. I, Spencer Shay, am going to construct the most awesome sculpture that has ever been sculpted. A giant, Fun-Goo covered… Beavcoon!" he said, ending with a bow. There really weren't any words to respond to that, but that was her brother for you, his behavior often left one…speechless.

"Well…good luck with that!" She said, flopping down onto one of the kitchen chairs.

"Awe, am I sensing some teenage angst?" Spencer patted the sofa cushion next to him and Carly walked over to sit beside him. "What's going on? Is this about you screaming and trying to beat Freddie's door down?" he asked her in a more serious voice.

As goofy as he was, he was always willing to listen to her problems, and he usually had surprisingly good advice. Right now she really needed it. She was a bundle of swirling emotions, none of which felt very good. She was angry and irritated, but most of all she was confused.

Normally when she felt like this she'd call Sam, pop some popcorn and pour out her problems over an episode of Girly Cow. But she couldn't do that this time. First, because Sam was MIA. Second, it wouldn't make much sense to call Sam, or even Freddie for that matter, since they were the reason she was sitting here fuming mad. And no doubt together right now.

Naïve was something she'd been called before. And if she were honest she'd have to say she understood why people would say that. She was prone to believing the best in people and seeing the bright side of most situations. But she didn't see it as naïve. She was perky. Upbeat. Positive. Unfailing. Optmistic. Okay, so maybe her outlook caused her some problems from time to time… like with Steven. She'd had to go a thousand miles, wear a disguise and catch him red handed before she believed he was bad news. And Chuck-he'd practically killed her brother before she'd believed the brat was…well, evil! But this was different; these were her best friends. Her best friends who were carrying on a relationship behind her back.

"Tell me what's on your mind," Spencer said.

"You mean besides plotting the murder of my two best friends?"

"So Sam and Freddie  _are_  the problem," he said, "You're still convinced they're together huh?" he asked.

Carly pulled the note she'd found out of her pocket and handed it to Spencer. He whistled.

"Yes! Gibby owes me twenty bucks!" He stood up and screamed.

Carly looked at him murderously.

"I mean…" he said, sitting down and lowering his voice, "I'm so surprised, when did this happen?"

Carly stood and walked angrily toward the stairs.

"Carly, wait!" Spencer said, "I was just kidding…come back!" He knelt down and grabbed a handful of Fun-Goo, "You can help me build my Beavcoon!" he called after her, as she ran up the stairs.

She threw her book bag down on her bad and then followed it, not bothering to take her shoes off as she normally would. She heard her phone ringing and smiled as she saw the caller's name.

Brad.

"Hey you!" she said, trying to sound happier than she felt.

"Hey, I just wanted to call and ask if you're allergic to any kinds of food?"

"Allergic?" she asked

"Yeah. For dinner on Saturday. I want to make sure the place I take you won't make you like break into hives or anything."

He was so sweet. Weird. But sweet.

"I can honestly say that no one has ever asked me that before a date. Should I give you my blood type too?" she joked

"It's all fun and games until someone goes into anaphylactic shock" he laughed. "So, are you okay now? Have you busted Freddie and Sam yet?"

Over the last few days she'd shared her suspicions with him…at length, and he just didn't understand the big deal. So what if Sam and Freddie were dating. And so what if they were 'hiding it'. Number one, they weren't doing a very good job of it. He was a guy, and admittedly not the type to pay much attention to body language or secret looks, but even he had to say that it was pretty obvious something was going on with the two of them. He had suspected there was something between them even before the lock-in. Number two, if they were keeping it a secret, however poorly, they must have a reason and he didn't think it was really anyone's business…even Carly's.

"Ah ha! So you admit it!" Carly cried triumphantly.

"Well…that note you showed me was pretty self-explanatory, but…"

"Ah ha!" Carly interrupted

"Will you quit 'ah ha'-ing me please?" Brad laughed, "Even if you're right and they do have something going… did you think that the fact that they're hiding it from everyone simply means they aren't ready to tell anyone yet?" he asked.

"But I'm not everyone! I'm their best friend! I know them better than anyone. And I'd actually be happy for them!" Carly whined, "They're not giving me a chance to be happy for them! I could have thrown them a 'Sam and Freddie love each other' party!"

Brad had to laugh. Carly had great intentions, but even he had to admit, she liked to stick her nose in other people's business… a lot.

"You want to have a party announcing they're together? No wonder they're not telling you!" he laughed, "If they can't even tell you… the person who knows them best, then there's no way they could be okay with telling the whole world, right?"

Carly groaned. Brad was right. She hated that he was right.

"Maybe you're right" she whispered.

"Aha!"

"Look who's 'aha-ing now" Carly laughed. "But even if you're right…"she paused.

"Yeah?"

"Even if you're right it's still hard. It still hurts that they're keeping secrets. Sam and Freddie are more than just friends to me. They're like my family. Neither of them has ever had much luck dating, and I really want them to be happy, I'm happy when they're happy and it just sort of sucks to think that they don't want to share that happiness with me; or to think that they're scared or nervous or worried about telling  _me_ the truth."

"Carly…"

"You're right Brad, maybe they have a reason for hiding that I don't know about, or understand. But I know Sam and Freddie. And even if they think that hiding this is what's best… it's not. I just…need to help them see that."

Brad sighed. He had three sisters, and with a dad in the military and gone a lot, he'd grown up around women. So he knew, better than most that once women turned on the soft voice and the puppy dog eyes, men didn't stand a chance. Even over the phone he could just see Carly's face, and he knew he was a goner. The next words out of his mouth he was sure he'd somehow live to regret.

"Okay. I get it. So what's the plan?"

He pulled the phone away from his ear as Carly's squeal echoed through it.

"Can you meet me at the Groovy Smoothie tonight?" she asked

"Sure, what time?"

Carly looked over at the clock. It was 6:30, barely enough time to set her plan in motion. But she'd pull it off. She had to.

"Make it around eight. No…better make it 9. Oh, and Brad? Is your cousin still visiting?"

"Chance? Yeah, he's in my room playing video games. Why?"

"Can you bring him with you?"

"Sure… but why?" he asked. Oh no. She could not be thinking what he thought she was thinking. "Wait a minute Carly. What is this about?"

"Well, I figure the easiest way to get Sam and Freddie to see reason… is for them to see each other… with other people" She whispered conspiratorially. "Just tell your cousin he's about to meet a great girl, and I'll see you at nine. Oh and Brad? Make sure he doesn't wear stripes."

Yep, he knew he was going to regret telling her he'd help her. This was going to end badly.

* * *

The air in the darkened theatre was cold and smelled faintly of stale popcorn and mothballs. The red velvet seats were worn from years of patrons, and the old projector made a constant clicking sound so loud that you had to strain to hear the movie. Sam and Freddie loved it here. It was the only place in Seattle where, for $10, two people could get popcorn, drinks and a movie. It was also one of the only places where Sam and Freddie could be themselves…together, without worrying about anyone else. Sitting here eating a big bucket of popcorn with Freddie's arm wrapped around her shoulder, the theatre filled with the screams of the poor teenage saps whose brains were being sucked out by zombies - Sam felt safe.

Freddie laughed out loud, pointing at the screen, where a teenage girl ran wild eyed, clad only in her underwear into a dark forest.

"Seriously! You run  _into_  the forest? Do you  _want_  to die?" This was the funniest part about slasher films to him; how completely illogical the people in them were.

The lack of light in the theatre gave Sam the opportunity to look at Freddie, uninterrupted. She really liked his face. The way his hair was always perfectly shaped around his ears. The way his eyelashes lay against his cheeks when he closed his eyes, like butterfly wings. He had a few pieces of hair that stubbornly refused to stay down, no matter how much gel he used. And when he was mad or frustrated he ground his teeth, making his jawline tense.

These were all small things that she'd probably never noticed before the last few months. They were among the things she would miss the most if their fairytale bubble burst. She sighed at that thought, trying to turn her attention back to the movie.

She felt Freddie squeeze her hand and when she turned to look at him, he was staring back at her with concern etched on his face.

"What's up Sam? You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm good!" she lied, "Just hungry…I'm going to get more popcorn." She grabbed the bucket from his lap and stood.

"More popcorn?" He raised an eyebrow.

"What?" she laughed, "I'm hungry! Now move it or lose it." She moved past Freddie and began the walk up the aisle toward the old theatre's lobby putting an extra swing in her hips just for his benefit. Mama knew he was watchin'.

Walking into this lobby always reminded Sam of those old movies her J'MawMaw liked to watch. You could tell that the now disheveled building has once been beautiful. But what had once probably been ornate was now worn.

The lobby was empty except for Mattie. Mattie's real name was Mathilda but she said the last person to call her that was the priest at her wedding. She and her husband, Jerry O'Haloran, owned the place. And despite the fact that Sam figured they had to be at least 100 years old apiece, Jerry still ran the projector and Mattie could be seen on most nights in her red vest with the gold fringe, dishing out popcorn to the small groups of people who enjoyed retro gore and black and white romance. Mattie told her that she and Jerry always picked out the movies themselves; horror and romance were the only ones they could agree on.

Mattie was there now, leaning over the glass candy counter with a pencil behind her ear, a stack of papers and a calculator in front of her. She looked up and smiled when Sam approached.

"Hey there Sam… need a refill" She asked, reaching her hand out for Sam's empty popcorn bucket.

Sam handed it to her and leaned on the counter while she waited.

"What's on your mind kid? Wouldn't have anything to do with your handsome boyfriend would it?" Mattie asked.

Sam smiled. Mattie and Jerry were really the only people who knew about her and Freddie. They'd been coming to this theatre for three months, but today was the first time they'd walked through that door holding hands. The O'Haloran Theatre was small and out of the way; they weren't likely to see anyone they knew here. There was a certain freedom in that.

"Boyfriend…I'll have to get used to hearing that I guess." Sam said.

"You'd be surprised what you can get used to if you wait long enough" Mattie said, "When I met Mr. O'Haloran he had a head full of hair so red it made me want to call the fire department. I told him I couldn't go on a date with him because it clashed with every dress I owned. But after a while I got used to it, and then I got so I actually liked it. When our daughter Grace was born with fire red hair it was one of the happiest sights I'd ever seen."

She handed the tub of popcorn, filled to the brim to Sam but brushed away her attempt to pay for it.

"It's on the house kid. You know…the two of you remind me of me and Mr. O'Haloran in our prime" she smiled with a wistful look in her eye.

"You and Jerry are like, perfect for each other" Sam said aloud, thinking of the way the O'Haloran's even seemed to look alike; like reflections of each other.

"Freddie and I are so different. But I guess you could probably tell that, what with his freakish neatness and general lack of attitude."

"And that bothers you?" Mattie asked

"No. Well, not really. But sometimes…sometimes I wonder what will happen when he realizes just how different we are." It was the first time she'd said it out loud. It didn't make her feel any better than when it'd just been a thought, unvoiced, in her head.

"Tell me something, kid. How long have you two been together?"

Sam thought back. She'd known Freddie for ages, they'd been in the same class or the same school since kindergarten. They'd been something like friends since they were ten. And she'd had feelings for him for over three months now. So when did the clock start ticking, when did she start to count them as "together". He'd been there all her life. They'd always been together.

"We've only been dating for seven days." Sam said

"But you've known him longer haven't you?"

"How did you know that?"

"I'm an old woman. And in my lifetime I've seen plenty of couples walking in and out of the door. You start to get a feeling about these things." She shrugged. "I've watched the two of you. I see how you look at him. How he watches you when you aren't looking. A man doesn't look at a woman like that when he's just got something casual on his mind. That boy loves you. It's as plain as the nose on his face." Mattie paused before continuing, "But I see other things too. Like how you don't hold his hand till that front door closes, and you always look around the lobby first. Like you're scared for someone to see you."

Sam looked down at her shoes. God, was she really that obvious? Mattie studied Sam from across the counter, head tilted to the side. Sam usually hated it when grown-ups did this. Like you were a puzzle they couldn't quite figure out.

"Sam, do you know why the only movies we show here are old horror movies and black and white romances?" Mattie asked.

"I don't know. Because you like mushy old movies and Jerry likes cheesy fake blood and guts?"

Mattie laughed long and loud and when she stopped her dentures made clicking noises.

"Are you kidding? I'm the one holding the tissues during those old love stories, while Jerry gets all dewey eyed"

Sam couldn't hide her shock at the revelation.

"So  _you're_ the one that picks the horror movies?"

"I'm gonna tell you something young lady. Something I've learned in my many years of marriage. Things never have to make sense to the people looking from the outside. You have to do what works for you. For instance, I haven't cooked a meal in over 50 years… the last time I tried I burned down our kitchen. And Jerry has never once had to do a home repair…not one. If I can't fix it we call someone who can."

"And that doesn't bother you. I mean…don't people think it's sort of, I don't know, weird?" Sam asked, as respectfully as she could.

"Weird to who? It's not weird to us. It works for us. And in the end, that's all that matters. Me and Mr. O'Haloran are plenty different, believe you me. But I love that old geezer just like he is and I don't give a hill of beans who knows it…or what they think. Besides," she'd said, "he might not have been Mr. Fix it… but he was certainly easy on the eyes. Now you better scoot on back in there with your boyfriend before I have to go in there and give you some competition. I bet he misses you already." Mattie winked at Sam and went back to looking at her paperwork.

Sam started back towards the theatre, thinking about what Mattie had said. Sam really liked Mathilda, she was strong, and funny and she didn't take any crap from anyone. She reminded Sam of someone else she knew. But something about what Mattie had said was eating at her. Normally Sam couldn't care less what anyone thought about what she said, did…wore. She was her own person. Always had been. But this thing with Freddie, it felt different somehow. Suddenly it did matter what people thought and that scared her. And she had no idea what to do about it.

She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and held her bucket in one arm as she fished it out.

_Carly: Hey… where r u? U left something my house._

Crap… where should she say she was.

This afternoon after leaving Carly's house, she and Freddie had stopped at his house long enough to grab his wallet before heading out to the movie theatre. On the way out she'd had to pay Lewbert five bucks to say he hadn't seen them. Lewbert better have kept his mouth shut or she knew a certain wart that was getting removed… by hand!

_Sam: a movie_

There, she hadn't lied

_Carly: by urself?_

God! What was with all the questions lately?

_Sam: yeah… Night of the Living Dead_

_Carly: eww… u left ur backpack_

_Sam: Crap… Bring it to school tomorrow?_

_Carly: No school… remember? Parent Teacher conferences._

_Sam: oh_

_Carly: meet me at the Groovy Smoothie and ill give it to you…ill even buy you a smoothie_

_Sam: when?_

_Carly: 9?_

Sam thought… it was eight now but the movie would be over soon. She could walk with Freddie to Bushwell Plaza and be at the Groovy Smoothie by nine.

_Sam: ok. l8r_

Freddie turned his head and grinned when Sam walked into the theater, grabbing the bucket of popcorn from her.

"What took you so long?"

"I was talking to Mattie. That is one cool old lady." Sam whispered, taking her seat as Freddie put his arm around her shoulders. "If I have to get old, I want to be like that."

"Loud and opinionated?" he said, laughing.

"You don't like Mattie?" Sam said, shocked.

"Of course I like Mattie. She's funny, she makes a great bucket of popcorn," he said, motioning to the bucket, "and she reminds me a little of you. Only you're cuter" he winked.

"Well thanks! And here I thought you were leaving me for Mattie and her hot, hot orthopedic footwear."

They watched the rest of the movie and gathered their things to leave. This was the only theater Sam went to where she actually picked up her trash and put it in the garbage can instead of leaving it strewn over the floor. She really did like the O'Haloran's.

As they left the theater, Mattie and Jerry stood behind the counter and waved to them. Mattie gave Sam a little wink as she and Freddie walked out the door.

Once outside the theatre, she saw Freddie reach in his pocked for his pearPhone. He looked over at Sam with confusion on his face.

"I got a text from Carly"

"Me too…I forgot to tell you. She texted me when I went to get popcorn. What does she want?

"For me to meet her…"

"At the Groovy Smoothie" they said in union. Sam turned to him and began a slapping motion, slowing to tap his cheek with one fingertip.

"How did you know?" Freddie asked, swatting Sam's hand away. He loved it when she was like this, playful and funny… and touching him outdoors in the daylight. He wished it was always like this.

"Because she told me the same thing"

"This can't be good Sam."

"What do you mean? We go to the Groovy Smoothie together all the time. No big deal. You're thinking too much." She walked over to him, leaned up and kissed his cheek. "Now quit worrying that pretty little head and let's go get smoothies. Mama's thirsty."

They walked the six blocks to the Groovy Smoothie, passing Bushwell Plaza on the way. Two blocks past the theater, Sam let go of Freddie's hand. He very reluctantly let her. He didn't say anything, tried not to let it bother him, but it did anyway. Just another one of the compromises he made to be with her. Mushy in private. Only.

* * *

They arrived at the Groovy Smoothie ten minutes later than Carly had instructed and were surprised to find the outside lights off, but the shop light on. Sam shrugged and led the way inside.

"Surprise!" Carly cried when she saw them. Sam stopped in her tracks. Freddie ran into the back of her…and then saw what she was looking at.

The Groovy Smoothie was empty except for Carly and Brad, who stood in front of them, holding hands with twin dopey smiles on their faces.

But that wasn't the problem.

Behind Brad stood a brown haired, blue-eyed Brad clone—surely a relative. And beside Carly stood…Patrice! One of the airhead girls who'd fawned over Freddie when he'd played a vampire on iCarly. What the heck were they doing here? And where was everyone else?

Carly stepped forward, letting go of Brad's hand.

"What's going on Carls?" Sam asked, still standing in the doorway. She reluctantly moved forward after a gentle nudge in her back from Freddie. "I thought you told me to meet you here at nine to get my backpack. Wait a minute!" she smiled and walked toward Carly, "Are you guys on a date? You move fast my friend" she laughed and punched Brad playfully on the shoulder. "So let me grab my bag and a smoothie and Fredward and I will be out of your hair."

Carly still stood there with her goofy smile.

"Um Sam…" Freddie said. Sam turned to look at him, the smile still on her face. He shook his head. He was pretty sure he knew what was going on, he was just in too much shock to say it.

Carly looped her arm through Sam's.

"I'm so glad you guys are here! Brad and I were just talking today about how happy we are, and how we wish everyone was as happy as us…right Brad?" She elbowed him.

"What? Oh yeah, right.  _So_  happy!" he said. But he didn't look happy. He looked…uncomfortable.

"So that's when I had this great idea!"

Sam's smile fell as she looked at Freddie. Freddie stared at his shoes. It was rare for Carly's great ideas to not end in disaster. This did not feel like it would be an exception. And if this was what Sam was beginning to think it was, she knew a certain brunette who didn't have long to live.

"Freddie, you know Patrice right?" Carly said. Patrice raised one perfectly manicured hand and wiggled her fingers at Freddie flirtatiously.

"Hey Freddie" she said, in a sing song voice that made Sam want to punch her in the throat.

"And Sam…" Carly continued, turning Sam toward the boy standing beside Brad, "this is Chance, Brad's cousin from Vancouver. You know, Vancouver… in Canada…where they make your favorite bacon that's actually ham, plus have three donut stores on every block" she motioned toward the Brad clone as he walked over to Sam.

"It's nice to meet you Sam. Carly and Brad told me a lot about you. You're even prettier than she said" he blushed at that and stood in front of Sam with his hands buried in the pockets of his cargo shorts.

Freddie stiffened. Who the heck was this guy telling his girlfriend how pretty she was! She already knew how pretty she was! Freddie had just told her not thirty minutes ago!

Sam took in the scene in front of her. Empty Groovy Smoothie. Carly and Brad being all hand-holdy and coupley. Some random dude staring at her boobs and a mini-skirted skank looking at Freddie as if he was the last meal on earth.

Holy chizz! This wasn't just smoothies.

This was a date!


	8. Truth & Consequences

"So that's when I was like 'OMG, Mom…. I asked for _fuchsia_  balloons… and these are obviously  _magenta_ '. Magenta! I mean, it could have like  _ruined_  my sweet sixteen party! You know what I mean?"

Patrice Russell was not smart. At all. And she wasn't particularly skilled at anything, unless the boys' bathroom stalls were to be believed. But she was pretty - very pretty; if you went for the tall, curvy, short skirt wearing, brunette type. Which is why, six months ago, Freddie would have given his new Devaglia to be sitting here, with her, on a date. But now…now he was trying to restrain himself from picking up a fork…and stabbing himself in the ear.

He felt her breath on his neck; her chair scraped the floor as she moved it closer to him. This was not good.

"You look, like, super-hot tonight," She purred into his ear. He chanced a look across the table at Sam. She was staring at Patrice, with murder in her eyes, holding a butter knife with her 'stabbin' hand'. Nope, this was not good at all. How had they gotten into this mess?

Carly.

Sweet, meddling Carly, who'd taken it upon herself to dictate the love lives of her best friends. He looked over at her, snuggled into Brad's side, smiling as Brad whispered something in her ear. She looked happy. After what happened with Steven she'd spent quite a few days in her pajamas moaning, crying and watching 'The Notebook'. He'd kept his distance and let Sam handle it. He wasn't good with crying girls but he'd made sure to tell her, whenever possible, that Steven was a world class douchebag who didn't deserve her…which was totally true. It was nice to see her happy again. But he was feeling something else looking at the two of them.

Jealousy.

He couldn't help it. He saw them, all cuddled up and holding hands and it made him see green. He wanted that too. Not with Carly...that ship had sailed long ago. He was jealous of their situation. He wanted that with Sam. He wanted to put his arms around her and whisper funny things in her ear to make her laugh. Tangle his fingers in that crazy mane of blond hair. Kiss the spot behind her ear that made her blush. And he wanted to do those things right here, in front of everyone. It was partially his fault; he'd agree to her insane plan to keep their relationship secret. But right now, sitting beside Brad and Carly and staring across the table at Sam… he wasn't so sure it was worth it.

"So Sam, Carly tells me that you're pretty good at art? Like drawing and stuff?" Brad's cousin Chance was a 'Questioner'. One of those people who are incapable of making a declarative statement, so everything they say comes out sounding like a question. God, that was annoying. "I like art a lot too?" he said- or asked, who knew which- looking, as he had been all night, from Sam's face slowly down to the cleavage visible from her v-neck purple tank top.

'What an asshat!' Freddie thought. Freddie wasn't a fighter… he avoided it whenever possible but this dude had about one more time to look at Sam… _his_  Sam like that and Freddie was going to do a double fist dance of his own on the guy's face. God, Sam was really starting to rub off on him.

Sam was amazed at the power boobs held over men. Like cats with a ball of yarn, take the smartest men in the world, throw a pair of boobs in their face and they were reduced to blubbering idiots. At one point in this miserable evening Chance had asked her what she liked to do for fun…then resumed staring at her boobs, again, not hearing a word she said. She'd told him that she loved to spend time at the circus where she could practice for her Olympic bid in long distance midget tossing. He'd nodded and told her that sounded "so cool". Freddie had burst out laughing then and when Sam looked across the table at him she'd thought 'I'm so lucky you're nothing like this douchebag I'm sitting next to'.

And she was lucky. Not that Freddie wasn't a normal teenage boy; she'd caught him staring at her plenty of times, but it didn't stop him from listening to her. He always listened to her, like he really cared what she was saying. And he had interesting things to say too. Even when he was going on and on about some new technology, which usually bored her to tears, she was amazed by his passion. He wasn't one of those guys who thought it was cool to act all unaffected and bored with life. Freddie felt things… things he shared with her. And now, from the looks of it, Patrice Russell wanted Freddie to share some things with her.

"So Freddie, do you like, play any sports? You know, like baseball or basketball?" Patrice asked

Stupid airhead. She knew Freddie didn't play a sport! She got passed around among the school jocks like a fruitcake at Christmas. Of course she knew he wasn't a jock!

"No…um...I'm more into computers and ...you know…stuff like that." The end of his sentence was more of a grumble, the rest of the words had gotten caught in his throat when he'd looked over at Sam. He could hear her voice in his head…"quit talking to the skankbag, Benson!"

"Oh… well that's cool! I don't either… I try to stay away from activities where balls fly at my face." Patrice said, putting her hand on Freddie's bicep.

"Well, there goes your social life." Sam said, without even a hint of a smile.

Patrice was used to girls making snotty comments; especially Samantha Puckett. She was prepared for this. She smirked at Sam, turned and placed her hand on Freddie's thigh; leaning in closer to his ear. He could feel her lip on his earlobe and shivered involuntarily.

"Maybe you can come back to my house later and we can…" The rest of Patrice's words were whispered too low for anyone but Freddie to hear. His face went a violent shade of red and he banged his knee on the table in his rush to stand up.

"Whoa! Will you look at the time?" He stretched his arm out to look at the watch he wasn't wearing. "I think it's probably about time to call it a night!" His voice cracked in nervousness.

Carly, who was pulled from her whisper session with Brad by the commotion next to her looked up at Freddie, smiled and yanked his arm to pull him back into his chair.

"Don't be silly Freddie, its only 10:15… and there's no school tomorrow. What's your hurry? Is something wrong?" She looked at him with one eyebrow raised, challenging him. Freddie sighed and lowered himself slowly into his chair, which was now much closer to Patrice's than it had been when he'd stood up. She was practically sitting in his lap.

Carly had to squeeze Brad's leg to keep from laughing out loud. In all her time knowing Sam and Freddie she'd never pulled off a truly epic plan on her own. After today Sam and Freddie were going to have to bow to her plotting awesomeness…this was going to go in history books! Things were going exactly as she'd hoped. Brad's pervy cousin had spent most of the night trying to fall down the front of Sam's shirt, and Freddie looked ready to kill him. Brad, who was admittedly a reluctant accomplice, had managed to keep his mouth shut and was playing the part of touchy, feely, doting boyfriend perfectly. Patrice though was the real star of this evening. Carly had met a lot of slutty girls in her life, but tonight she was pretty sure she'd met their queen and she was, from the looks of it, trying devour Freddie's ear whole.

When she'd called Patrice to tell her, much to Patrice's delight, that she wanted to set her up with Freddie, she'd figured Patrice would flirt with Freddie a little and make Sam jealous… but this was sooo much better. Her only worry was that if she didn't get a confession out of Sam and Freddie soon, Patrice was going to fall victim to Sam's stabbin' hand. She suddenly wished she'd told Sam  _not_  to being the box cutter she always kept in her shoe.

"Soo…," Cary said, looking around the table. "Prom is next week!" She and Patrice squealed in unison. "Freddie… Patrice was just telling me that she doesn't have a date yet. And I told her that was a coincidence… because you didn't either!"

Freddie froze. What the hell was he supposed to do now? He glanced briefly at Patrice, who as smiling at him and then at Sam, who was biting the inside of her cheek and tapping her shoe, furiously, on the floor. Ten minutes. He guaranteed that's about all they had before Sam went Hiroshima Skankasaki on Patrice. Patrice had a good three or four inches on Sam in height but Sam had the advantage of years of practiced violence. Patrice did not stand a chance.

"Freddie! We should totally go together. We'd be, like, so super-cute! Right?" she looked to Carly for confirmation.

Sam rolled her eyes and went back her wings. Carly and Patrice were talking about prom dresses, and shoes and the best restaurant to go to for dinner. Brad and his cousin, who'd taken a break from staring down Sam's shirt, were discussing a new video game Brad had just got. Sam was surprised to see that Freddie wasn't a part of that conversation. He loved video games. But instead, Freddie sat on the opposite side of the table...staring at her. She tried to give a little smile, but he just shook his head and slumped down in his chair with a sigh.

She felt bad. As much as she wanted to strangle Carly right now…she guessed it wasn't totally Carly's fault. If Sam hadn't forced Freddie to keep this a secret, Carly would already know. And if Carly had already known about them, she never would have done this. But what was she supposed to do now? Stand up in front of Patrice…who wrote the school's gossip column… and tell them all what was going on? She couldn't do that! She wasn't ready.

She looked over at Freddie. He was ready. The last couple days there'd been little instances where he'd silently resisted their secret. They'd been kissing in the hallway at school and she'd tried to pull away when she'd heard footsteps approaching but he'd held onto her waist, just a second longer. Long enough to make her heart race at the threat of discovery. Long enough to let her know…he was ready. And on the way here, she'd dropped his hand at the corner by The O'Haloran, just like always but he'd held on; gripping hers tighter, just for a moment. When he'd finally let go she'd thought about what Mattie had said to her.

_'It only matters what works for you'._

She wasn't sure what worked for them. She'd thought that what they had was working… until tonight.

She looked over at Carly and Brad. This was only their first date but they already looked really comfortable together. Carly was just that kind of girl, she could fit anywhere, with anyone. Sam, on the other hand, had only ever been with one boy who made her feel completely comfortable, and that was Freddie. She watched as Brad grabbed Carly's hand and laced their fingers together. Freddie had amazing hands, warm and soft… but not too soft. And he never held her too tight, just enough for her to know he was there. She wished she could hold his hand now.

She absentmindedly gnawed on her chicken wing. A lone drop of barbeque sauce fell into her cleavage, dribbling down the front of her shirt…and that's when the chizz hit the fan.

Chance's supersonic pervert reflexes kicked into action and he grabbed a napkin, dipped it in water and proceeded to try 'helping' Sam get the sauce off the front of her shirt. The fact that 'helping' put him in direct skin contact with her boobs was not lost on Freddie.

"Dude! What the hell are you doing?" Freddie yelled, jumping up fast enough to send his chair skidding back against the wall.

His yelling startled Chance, sending the glass of water and ice he was holding, spilling over onto Sam, who screamed bloody murder.

"Holy chizz!" She yelled, glaring at Chance, who didn't even have the good sense to look sorry, and instead, commenced rubbing the front of her shirt even harder; eliciting a smack from Sam. "Back off or lose a hand!" she barked.

"Aren't you supposed to be melting?" Patrice said sarcastically, laughing at Sam.

"Patrice!" Carly yelled, jumping up.

"Bite me, prissy pants!" Sam growled at Patrice from behind clenched teeth.

"No thanks, I don't really go 'that way'" Patrice took a step toward Sam. Bad move.

"From what I hear you go  _every_  way!"

"Jealous much?"

"Of what? The four lane highway between your legs?"

"No…of this." Patrice turned on her heel, wrapped one arm around Freddie's neck and pressed her lips to his.

The entire room gasped in shock, except for Freddie, whose response was to go red-faced, wide eyed and begin flailing his arms in protest. And Sam, whose eyes narrowed in concentration as she threw down the towel she'd been drying herself with. Before anyone could make a move Sam stood on the chair beside her and launched herself at Patrice with an animalistic war cry.

Patrice, screamed as her head was pulled backward, away from Freddie by her tiny blonde attacker. Sam wrapped her legs around Patrice's waist like a spider monkey as the two girls fell in a heap to the floor.

Carly looked to Brad for help, but Brad was doubled over, bracing himself against the table as tears ran down his face and he laughed so hard no sound came out of his mouth. Freddie bent over, grabbing Sam around the waist in an attempt to detach her from Patrice. Chance stared down at the sight in front of him with a lecherous grin, as if trying to decide whether to call the police …or throw mud on them.

"Carly, help me!" Freddie called to her, shaking her into action.

Freddie, was holding a wiggling Sam in the air; her arms flailing and her blond hair hiding her red face. A steady stream of expletives fell from her lips.

Carly leaned down to help Patrice stand up, but Patrice smacked her hand away.

"Hey! I was only trying to help!" Carly said

"Help? Help! You told me to come here for a nice date with a hot guy! Not a Psycho Convention!"

"There's no reason to talk to Carly like that" Freddie started.

"Oh, you just shut up! Do you know how many guys would give their left leg to go out with me? And instead you spend the whole night staring at that blonde freak show over there." She pointed at Sam, "You… you… geek!"

"That's it! No one calls him that but me!" Sam cried, wriggling out of Freddie grasp, going for Patrice's throat. Freddie caught her again, wrapping his arms around her waist, carrying her to the far corner of the room. She continued to fight against him but he wouldn't let her go.

Patrice gave a high pitched scream and ran for the exit. Stopping at the door she turned to face them all.

"You're ALL crazy!" with that she turned on her heel and fled the building.

Chance looked toward where Patrice had just exited then back at the group before making a hasty move for the door.

"Um…she might need someone…to uh, comfort her in this...difficult time." He glanced at Sam. "It was nice to meet you. Sorry about your shirt." And with that he dashed out the door, calling Patrice's name into the night.

Silence filled the room as everyone tried to process what had just happened. The only noise was the occasional snort from Brad, who still hadn't gotten his laughter under control. Carly sighed and plopped into her chair. Tonight was….a disaster. Fighting and name calling; what a mess. And Sam and Freddie were just sitting there, his arms wrapped around her…still holding onto their stupid little secret and not even knowing how hard Carly had worked on this plan and….wait a minute. Freddie was holding Sam? Freddie was holding Sam! And she was letting him! Right here in front of Carly's very own eyes!

Sam and Freddie seemed to notice Carly noticing them at the same time and Sam shot quickly out of Freddie's lap. She started toward Carly when Freddie grabbed her hand.

Carly sat studying them. Sam didn't move, or try to pull her hand away. She just sighed and lowered her head as Freddie squeezed her hand and moved to stand beside her.

"Sam…" Carly said, standing to face her friend, "I'm sorry about what Patrice said. I didn't know she'd be like that. I just figured…I mean, I just thought… I was only trying to…" in her head when she'd practiced this, she'd known exactly what she'd say. Now, she had to wonder if Brad had been right. Maybe she should have just left it alone. The secret was out, but Sam looked sort of miserable.

"It's alright Carls" Sam said, looking up at Freddie, "I think we all know what you were trying to do."

"And we sort of owe you an apology too" Freddie said. He searched Sam's eyes and she shook her head. If they were going to take the plunge, he was going to have to jump first.

"Carly," Sam squeezed his hand for reassurance, "Sam and I…well, we've sort of been…dating." He sighed with relief. He wasn't sure how Carly was going to react, or Brad or even Sam for that matter…but right now he didn't care. He'd said it, out loud! And Sam was still standing here, holding his hand. He felt amazing.

Sam felt weird. Standing here, with Freddie beside her, holding her hand for the world to see – or Carly and Brad at least. He was smiling down at her and he looked so happy. This was what he'd wanted. And as scared as she was of Carly's reaction, it did feel good not to be hiding it from her anymore. And she had to hand it to Shay putting this fiasco together. Tonight's events were obviously planned for the purpose of making her and Freddie so jealous they had to tell her about them. Which meant she'd probably known all along. Which meant that Sam was losing her touch. That's what falling in love with a nub would do to you.

"Say something Carly…" Sam let go of Freddie's hand and went to sit next to Carly, who seemed to have gone catatonic. "Carls?"

Suddenly Carly's face broke into a wide smile as she jumped from her seat with a loud cry.

"A ha! I knew it!" she wagged her finger, pointing between Sam and Freddie, "you little sneaky snakes! You were sucking face behind my back all this time but I knew it!" she looked at Brad, "I told you! Didn't I tell you?"

"She did tell me" Brad said, "I didn't really care…but she told me anyway."

"How long have you known?" Sam asked

"I've suspected since the lock-in, but I've known since this morning… I found your Fatcake note from Freddie."

"Betrayed by a Fatcake!" Sam said, "So… are you …mad at us?"

"I'm mad that you kept a secret from me… again! But I'm not mad that you're together. I'm so happy for you!"

"She wanted to throw a party" Brad said

"Dude!" Sam and Freddie said in unison

"First of all, in case you haven't noticed, I am not a dude. And second of all I wasn't going to throw a party…" Brad looked at her pointedly, "okay I thought about a party…but it wouldn't have been a big one!"

"That's why we didn't tell you!" Sam laughed.

"That's what I said!" Brad said.

"Seriously Carly, we're sorry we kept it from you. It wasn't Freddie's fault though. He wanted to tell you all long but, I don't know… I guess I just wasn't ready." Sam said

"But now you know… so no more secrets." Freddie said, grabbing Sam's hand again. God it felt good to be able to touch her right now. Mushy in public was definitely better.

"All right ya'll, you don't gotta go home, but you gotta get the heck out of here!" T-Bo, who'd been surprisingly silent during the entire evening…even the melee, appeared behind the counter pointing a stick at them. "I gotta get ready for tomorrow. Pickles on a stick! Come back and I'll give you a discount!"

They began gathering their things, mumbling their 'no thank-you's' to T-Bo. That man would put anything on a stick. Carly knew this for sure, in order to get the place to themselves for the last two hours T-Bo had made her buy two boxes of muffins…sticks included.

Carly and Brad walked out ahead of Sam and Freddie and waited for them under the street light. Freddie had opened the door for Sam and was now wrapping his arm around her waist as he leaned down to whisper something in her ear.

"Earth to the lovebirds!" Carly laughed, "Sorry to interrupt, but we'd better get going."

Freddie looked down at Sam and answered Carly without breaking their gaze.

"You guys go on ahead, we'll catch up with you…later. I'm going to take a walk… with my girlfriend."

Brad grabbed Carly's hand before she could protest Freddie's request and began pulling her in the direction of Bushwell Plaza.

"Call me tomorrow… both of you!" She called to them as Brad dragged her down the street, "And don't start making out and forget iCarly tomorrow!"

A block away from The Groovy Smoothie Brad put his arm around her and drew her to him.

"So, how do you feel? Vindicated?"

Carly snuggled deeper into his side.

"I don't know. I guess I just feel good that they're happy, and that I get to share it with them. And a little weirded out that now I'm going to see them making out." She shuddered at that thought, then looked up at Brad, "And I feel happy that you're here. I know I've been a bucketful of crazy today, and you still put up with me so… thanks!" She ended her sentence with a kiss on his cheek.

Brad gave her side a squeeze as they continued walking toward her building. She was nuts… but he liked it.

"So, now that we've gotten past busting Sam and Freddie… can we concentrate on us?"

"Ooo…us… I like the sound of that." She said flirtatiously.

"Me too, Carly, me too"

* * *

Outside the Groovy Smoothie, Sam and Freddie stood in semi-darkness.

"So hotlips, do you feel better now that Carly knows?" she asked him.

"Yeah…but there's still something missing"

Sam panicked. She'd just fought a girl, had water poured on her by Lester the Molester and admitted to Carly that she and Freddie were together. She didn't think she could really do anymore tonight.

"What do you mean?" she asked

"I mean there's something else I've wanted to do… and I think this is the perfect place" He let go of Sam's hand and proceeded to climb up the concrete block holding the dim street light. With one arm wrapped around the metal pole and one arm flung wide he threw his head back.

"I love Samantha Puckett!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. Somewhere in the distance dogs started barking. Sam had to smile. There was no end to his nubbishness.

"You're such a dork!" She laughed.

He jumped down and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You love it" he leaned in to press his lips to hers.

He was right, she did.


	9. All the reasons why

She woke to the sound of her phone ringing. More accurately, she woke to the sound of the Galaxy Wars theme song playing. She rolled over, fumbling blindly on her nightstand for her phone.

It was Freddie. She didn't even have to look at the caller I.D. to know that.

For the last seven days he'd called her every morning at exactly seven o'clock. He said it was 'their thing', she said it was 'his death wish'. Sam wasn't exactly a morning person.

"If you want to keep putting those hands on Mama's no-no places, you had better quit waking me up at the butt crack of dawn!" she tried to grumble at him, but her heart wasn't in it. Even at this ridiculously early hour, hearing his voice gave her chills.

"Up and at 'em woman! We got a web show to film." Freddie laughed. iCarly didn't film for another ten hours, and he knew how much Sam hated to be woken early, but he couldn't help himself. The fact that his new status as her boyfriend allowed him to tease her like this without any true retaliation still hadn't lost its novelty. And she sounded so damn sexy when she was just waking up.

He thought of her, laying there in a tank top and panties –Sam said she had a tendency to strip in her sleep – her blond hair spread out over her pillow, her blue eyes heavy lidded with sleep. The thought was more than enough to get his heart racing. He wondered if she had any idea the effect she had on him.

"It is half past too freakin' early in the morning, so this call had better have a happy ending, or there's gonna be problems."

"I can think of a few happy endings…" he whispered into the phone, " they all start with you and me…and they end with…"

"Pancakes! Please say pancakes…with extra bacon!"

Freddie laughed. That wasn't exactly what he was talking about, but you can't wake up Sam Puckett this early and not expect to feed her.

"Pancakes it is!"

Sam threw the covers off and sat on the edge of her bed, running a hand through her hair. This was worth getting up for…free food and time with Freddie. As win-win a situation as she could dream of.

"So what time should I be there? Now sounds good to me. Mama is hungry!"

"Yeah, I'm sure you worked up quite the appetite trying to kill Patrice"

"Hey! That was totally not my fault. She needs to learn not to touch things that don't belong to her!"

Freddie wasn't complaining, watching Sam attack Patrice, over him no less, had been one of the top ten hottest things he'd ever seen.

"Enough small talk Freduccini…what time is breakfast?"

"My mom is leaving for work at eight I think. Why don't you come then?"

"You got it. I got 'The Evil Within 3', the extended director's cut. I'll bring it with me."

"Actually, I thought maybe we'd go out. The Seattle Arts Festival is downtown today. Maybe we could ask Carly and Brad to come with us?"

"That sounds great…except for the part about the festival…and downtown…and Carly and Brad."

"Sam! I thought we were past this?"

"Past what!"

"Past acting like vampires! All we ever do is sit in the dark…at your house, at my house, at the movies.

"We don't just sit…we also make out" she said, hoping to distract him from his point.

"In the house!"

Okay…that hadn't worked.

"All I said was that I didn't want to go to some lame arts festival. And Carly and Brad are sweet…but if I have to watch them making goo-goo faces I'm gonna lose my pancakes!"

"The festival won't be lame and who cares if Brad and Carly are making goo-goo eyes! They're a  _couple_ , and if you hadn't noticed, that's sort of what couples do. Normal couples anyway."

He shouldn't have said that.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Well… you didn't seem to have a problem locking lips in public when you were with Jonah… or Pete, or that weird dude you met in juvie!"

"Oh, so now you're jealous?"

"I am not jealous"

"No, you're just pissed off that I'm not tonguing you down in front of the world. I tell you what. Let's skip breakfast, hop a plane to New York and I can screw you senseless while everyone watches on the Times Square Jumbo-Tron!"

There was silence. Then she heard chuckling. And a snort, and Freddie erupted into laughter.

"What the hell is so funny Benson! You can't laugh while I'm tryin' to tell you off!"

"I'm sorry," he said, still laughing, "but…the Jumbo-Tron! Really?" He let out a breath, finally getting his laughter under control, "Listen, I'm not trying to fight with you. I'm just trying to make a point."

"And your point is?"

"My point is…" He paused and she could hear his mother screaming in the background, "I'm coming Ma!" he yelled back, "Listen Sam, we're gonna have to talk about this later. But we are going to talk about it."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll see you at eight-ish"

"If you come too late, no food for you" he threatened.

"If you eat my food, I break your arm" Sam said sweetly before hanging up.

She shook her head and walked toward the bathroom to start getting ready. This relationship stuff was exhausting. Before they became a couple she and Freddie fought all the time. She hit him, he screamed and hurled an insult, she threw one back along with her fist, Carly made them apologize and they moved on. Now, not only did they have to learn how to communicate without arguing…but they had to learn to do it without Carly playing referee. This was going to be interesting.

She wiped the fog off the mirror as she wrapped a towel around her. She studied her reflection in the mirror. Last night, when he dropped her off, Freddie stood on her porch staring at her. When she'd asked him why, he'd said 'because sometimes I can't get over how beautiful you are'. She tried to see that in the mirror. Blond hair, blue eyes, decent smile. She figured she was okay as looks went, but beautiful? She wasn't so sure she could see that. Yet another thing that amazed and worried her about Freddie. He saw things in her that no one else saw; including her. Every time they were together he found another thing to tell her. That she was smart, and funny. That she was talented and, as he put it, an evil genius. The compliments were creating a standard she knew she'd never live up to, a pedestal she was sure to fall from.

She walked to her closet, searching for something to wear. If she was going to have to follow the dork to this stupid festival, then she was going to wear something that would make him wish he'd kept her behind closed doors.

* * *

Freddie sent a quick text to Carly, asking if she and Brad wanted to come to the festival with him and Sam, then left his room to see what his mother was yelling about.

"Freddie, I've been calling you for breakfast for seven and a half minutes! When young men make their mothers wait, mommy's teeth will start to grate!"

His mother was crazy. He knew this. And even if he didn't, Sam never missed an opportunity to tell him. But she hadn't always been this way. When his dad died…well, nothing had really been the same since then, but it wasn't something he talked about, or wanted to think about. It was enough for him to know that when their whole world had fallen apart, his mom had done whatever it took to hold it all together for them. Maybe that made her a little crazy; okay – it definitely made her crazy, but it also made him know that she loved him.

"Sorry mom, I was on the phone."

"You know spending too much time on the phone isn't safe. They did a presentation on it at my Aggressive Parenting meeting. There are all these tiny waves of radiation floating right into your sweet little unprotected ears!"

Freddie laughed and sat down at the table across from his mom. She placed a bowl of Whole Grain Healthy O's in front of him. He grimaced and dipped his spoon into the bowl. Maybe if he just swirled it around until she left for work he could avoid actually eating it.

"So what do you have planned for the day?"

"Oh…um, I was just going to go to the Seattle Arts Festival downtown with Carly and Brad…and Sam" he said the last part under his breath. But his mom and her supersonic hearing were not to be fooled.

"Did you say Sam? As in Samantha Puckett? You're spending the day with that…that…delinquent!"

"Mom!"

"Fredward Benson! I am not going to leave you alone all day with a girl who has made it her mission in life to disfigure your beautiful face! That's it, I'm calling in to work!" She left the kitchen, walking toward the bedroom to grab her phone.

Freddie dropped his spoon in his soggy cereal and ran after his mom, stopping her outside the door of his bedroom.

"Mom, seriously, stop! This is ridiculous! You're overreacting!"

"Overreacting?"

"Yes, overreacting! I hang out with Sam all the time and you've never tried to stop me before."

"Yes, at school with teachers and security guards or at Carly's with Spencer…who is admittedly not the best chaperone around… but not alone!"

"Nothing is going to happen, mom. Sam wouldn't hurt me."

"Oh really? Who was it that gave you a tattoo that almost gave me a heart attack?"

"Sam…but it wasn't real!"

"And who was it that gave you that knot on your head the day before our annual mother-son glamour photo shoot?"

"She didn't mean to…"

"Oh, so she accidently hit you over the head with a block of wood? And who was it who filled your backpack with fire ants? And almost got you arrested for hacking the school's computer? And…"

Freddie held up his hands

"Alright, alright…I get it. You don't like Sam"

"Don't like her! This has nothing to do with not liking her! It has to do with her trying to kill you!"

Freddie threw his hands up in frustration and walked into his bedroom.

"Freddie." His mom walked in behind him, bent on making him see her way. "That girl is a bad influence! Her mother is trollop and didn't you tell me that she's been to..." she lowered her voice to a tense whisper, "juvie? Juvie, Freddie! Several times! Do you even know what kind of germs there are in places like that? Where criminals rest their heads, nasty germs are sure to tread!"

Freddie sat down on his bed and lowered his head into his hands. What was he supposed to say. He knew his mom loved him, and he knew that she was only saying these things because of that. Because she didn't know Sam. But he did…he knew the Sam that most people didn't take the time to see and even if most of the things his mom had said were true…they weren't the whole story.

"Mom, you just don't understand. Those things…the things that Sam's done…that she does, they're not…"

"So you admit it! You know that what I'm saying is true?"

"Yes! Okay, yes. Is that what you want me to say? Yes, she did knock me in the head with a stick, and yes, she did go to juvie, and yes she did do all the rest of the things you said but … things have become a little different the past few months."

"Different! How are things different? Has she had a personality transplant?"

"They just are. It's different…she's different. She wouldn't hurt me, mom!"

"How do you know that Freddie! She's bad news!"

Freddie felt fire in his blood. His face blazed red and he felt himself shaking. He'd never been this mad at his mom. He stood in front of her silent, scared that if he opened his mouth he'd say something he'd regret. He'd always respected her, but standing here, listening to her ripping Sam apart finally made something inside of him snap.

"She's not bad news! She's beautiful… and smart… and loyal. She's strong and fearless and amazing! You have no idea who she is, because you've never even given her a chance to show you! But I know who she is… and I love her."

His mother looked like someone had knocked the air out of her. The color drained slowly from her face as she stared up at Freddie. He was still shaking, his arms stiff at his side. Trying to calm himself he stepped backwards and sat down hard on the edge of the bed.

There it was; out in the open. He hadn't intended it to come out that way. He'd wanted to bring Sam over, sit his mom and down and tell her – maybe over dinner. This hadn't been the plan.

"You what?" His mother said, her voice uncharacteristically soft. "You…love her? So you are seeing her?"

He looked up at her. He wanted her to understand

"Yes. I love her mom. I really love her, and she loves me too."

"Well…I…I don't know what to say." She sighed deeply, running her hand over her brow. Reaching over to Freddie's desk she paused, looking at the picture frame that had sat there as long as Freddie could remember. It was a photo of him, and his dad. They were sitting in front of a Christmas tree, each making silly faces at the camera. She traced her fingers along the edge.

"At times like these…I really wish your father were here. He'd know what to say. He always knew what to say." Her voice cracked and swiped at a tear making its way down her face.

Freddie swallowed hard as tears threatened to fill his eyes.

"I miss him too."

He watched her face, waiting to see her next move. She was quiet, looking at the photo as if lost in her own world.

"Mom…I'm sorry you found out like this. I wanted to tell you earlier. You know…bring Sam over and tell you about us. But I'm glad you know now. I know you don't like Sam, but … she's going to be a part of my life. I don't want to hurt you, or make you sad. And I don't want to disrespect you, but I love Sam, and I'm not going to give her up for anyone. Not even you."

His mom stood, walking toward his bed. She sat down beside him.

"So…how long have you and Samantha…"

"Sam."

"Sam. How long have you and Sam been…seeing each other?"

Freddie looked over at his mother. He wasn't sure if he should answer her. Maybe this was a trap.

"You really want to know?"

She nodded her head.

"We've been hanging out for a few months. Just movies and stuff like that. But we've been dating for a week now."

"And she's… nice to you?"

He smiled. If she only knew. Sam had been 'nice to him' right on this very bed.

"Yeah, ma. She's nice to me. She makes me happy" He looked at her sincerely, "I'm sorry I yelled at you Mom. And I'm sorry I waited so long to tell you. But I'm not sorry for being with Sam. I love her."

"Freddie, there are a lot of big moments for mothers. The first time your baby talks. The first time they walk. The first day of school …and the first time you realize that your little boy is becoming a man" She smiled at him, "I may not be…fond of Samantha. I realize that I don't know her very well…but I know you. And I trust that if someone as wonderful as you can see something in her, and be in love with her… well she can't be all bad. So tell me…tell me about the girl who's stolen my babies heart."

Freddie released slowly the breath he hadn't realized he was holding and did just that. He told her about their trips to The O'Haloran were, as it turns out, his mom and dad had gone on a few dates themselves. He told her about how funny Sam was, how she was the best things about iCarly. He told her how Sam made him feel, how he felt strong when he was with her; like he could do anything. And he told her how much he wanted them to work, how much he wanted Sam to trust him, and how scared he was that she didn't.

He'd never talked to his mom like that. It felt good.

"Well," his mother said, standing to her feet, "Maybe I was wrong about Saman…Sam. But just remember, I'm your mother. It's my job to keep my eye on you. Now, if you're done with your teenage tirade, can you come and give your mother a hug?" she opened her arms to him and he stepped into them returning her embrace.

"Thanks mom, and I promise you…you're going to love her." She looked at him doubtfully, "or at least learn to tolerate her…for my sake"

She pulled away and kissed his forehead.

"Freddie!"

"What now!"

"You left your window open! That is an invitation for thieves and criminals!" She walked over and shut his window, setting all three of the locks she'd attached before glancing at her watch, "Oh my goodness, it's almost eight thirty, I'm late for work."

She walked quickly out of Freddie's room, gathering her jacket, purse and keys. Freddie followed her, grabbing his phone to check his messages. It was almost eight-thirty and he hadn't heard from Sam.

* * *

' _That girl is a delinquent!'_

' _She's been to juvie!'_

' _Yes! Okay, yes…yes she did do all the rest of the things you said.'_

Sam shoved her hands into the pockets of her shorts as she descended the stairs of Bushwell Plaza. She was numb, she didn't even hear what Lewbert was screaming at her as she exited the building. When she got outside she slumped against the cool bricks of the building; willing herself to breath, to be calm, to not cry.

She'd been excited to actually arrive at Freddie's house early. She was never early – she was rarely even on time. But when she got to his door she heard his crazy mothers voice and figured she'd just shimmy down the fire escape and sneak into Freddie bedroom. If she was lucky he'd be getting dressed, and she was not opposed to lounging on the bed, watching a half-naked Freddie getting dressed. The puberty Gods had really been good to that boy.

Freddie's mom, the freakishly protective psychopath that she was, had fixed Freddie's window with two locks in addition to the one originally attached, but Sam had yet to meet a lock that she couldn't pick. She'd made quick work of the locks and was sliding the window open when she heard Freddie and his mom enter the room screaming.

This was new. She'd heard Freddie and his mom fight before. In the last year or so he'd gotten much better at standing up for himself when it came to Mrs. Benson. But this didn't sound the same. He was really screaming, his face was red and he looked like he was shaking. This was a side of Freddie she hadn't really witnessed before. She wondered if she should leave, give them some privacy, but, being Sam, she didn't consider it long before deciding that there was no way she was missing this.

She should have left.

She stood up from her spot against the brick wall and weighed her options. She could go upstairs. She knew that Freddie was probably waiting for her. But she couldn't face him, not now. Her body was on auto-pilot, her feet taking her home - away from Bushwell Plaza, away from Freddie.

He hadn't said anything. His mother had called her a delinquent; brought up all of the bad thing she'd done to Freddie. But her screaming insults about Sam didn't hurt nearly as much as Freddie's silence. His mom hated her. That wasn't really a shock, and if she thought about it, she could understand. But Freddie's silence…what did that mean?

She walked up the steps to her house, praying that her mother wasn't home. The last thing she needed was quality time with Pam. She was down enough as it was. And she could only imagine what her mom would say if she found out about this.

' _Men don't stay with girls like us Sam… they always leave…always'_

Yet another 'Pamism'. And one that she didn't need to hear right now. It was already running on a loop in her head.

Closing the door behind her she called out for her mom, breathing a sigh of relief when she was met with silence.

Silence. It was like her new enemy.

Her stomach growled angrily. She hadn't had breakfast; no pancakes for her today. She walked into the kitchen and grabbed a Toaster Tart. Frosted Strawberry – her favorite. Waiting for it to warm in the microwave she replayed the scene from Freddie bedroom over and over in her head; trying to see it a different way. She must have missed something; heard him wrong. Yesterday he said he loved her; screamed it into the night from a freakin' lamp post! But today he'd just sat there; told his mother that she was right.

These last few weeks he'd made her feel so good, so special. Even before they were "official", just being with him had made her feel like she could do anything. Like she didn't have to be what everyone expected of her. She hadn't felt that good in a long time. A very long time.

The microwave signaled that her Toaster Tart was done. She opened the door and stared in, struck by an unfamiliar feeling.

She wasn't hungry.

She slammed the microwave door and headed for her room, throwing herself face first onto the bed. She wanted to cry; but she couldn't. She wanted to scream; but she was too tired. She wanted to…not feel the way she was feeling.

She reached under her pillow, her hand searching for a familiar piece of soft, worn felt. She found it and pulled it out, turning over on her back.

Pippy. Her stuffed panda. Everyone she knew would be shocked to know that Sam Puckett had a favorite stuffed animal. But Pippy was more than that, she couldn't think of one crisis in her life when she hadn't had him with her. He was like cotton filled therapy.

She reached into the slit in his back. She'd put it there when she was seven and decided that he needed his appendix removed. Only she didn't know exactly where an appendix was. She pulled out the photo she kept hidden there.

Sam stared down it. It was torn in one corner, and the creases criss-crossing its surface made seeing the faces on it nearly impossible. But to her they were as un-obscured as the day the picture had been taken. She remembered him asking a woman passing by to take it.

' _I need a picture of my Princess',_  he'd said

She saw her father, his mouth open wide in a smile as he pushed five-year old Sam on the swings. She was wearing her favorite princess costume and her Sesame Street moon boots. He'd told her she looked beautiful.

Tears filled her eyes as she remembered.

**_(Flashback: 12 years ago)_ **

_The playground swing went higher and higher, reaching toward the bright sun. The small, blond girl sitting on it was the picture of happiness, her head thrown back, mouth open, her tinkling laughter musical in its sweetness._

" _Higher Daddy, higher!"_

_And he obliged; he rarely denied her anything. She was his princess._

" _Five more minutes Sammy, then we have to meet mom and Mellie."_

" _Aww Daddy, I don't wanna! Mellie's stinky!" She wrinkled her nose to drive home her point and kicked her tiny feet hard, trying to go higher. She let her head lay back as the wind blew through her pig tails. She loved this feeling, like she was floating in space. Just the sun and the wind and her daddy's voice. No one calling names or yelling. No slamming doors. No hiding in her room. She wished she could stay here forever._

" _Alright Sammy, time to go"_

_Her face crumpled into a frown. She hated those words. Hated to stop floating. Hated to go home. But at least her daddy was there._

_She felt his large, warm hand take hers and give it a squeeze as they started toward their car. Every day with her daddy was wonderful. But today was extra wonderful; it was her birthday. And even though she had to share it with Mellie, it was still going to be the best day ever._

_She sat in the back seat, wiggling her feet and singing to her stuffed panda Pippy. She'd had Pippy since she was a tiny baby. He came with her everywhere._

" _Daddy, is it my special day today?_

" _You know it is Sammy"_

" _And I'm gonna have a big cake, and I can eat all I want?"_

" _You and Mellie are going to have a big cake. And yes, you can eat as much as you want."_

" _And you and me and Mellie are gonna sleep in a big tent in the backyard?"_

_Her father looked at her in the rearview mirror, her blue eyes lit with excitement. He tried to match her smile._

" _You got it Princess"_

" _And we're gonna play Sleeping Beauty, an I get to be the princess…and Mellie has to be the smelly old dragon!"_

" _Sammy!" Her dad chided her, "You and Mellie can both be the princess."_

_She frowned. She didn't want to share being the princess with Mellie. She liked being adventure princesses, Mellie wanted to be princesses that just sat in the castle all day. Boring!_

_They pulled up to the front of the white clapboard house. The yellow trim was fading and the porch was littered with children's toys._

" _Daddy?"_

" _Yes Sammy?"_

" _Me and Mellie have to be nice to each other, right?"_

" _That's right."_

" _Because we're family and family has to love each other, right?"_

" _That's right baby girl."_

_She paused and buried her face in the soft, worn fur of Pippy's neck._

" _Do you love Mama, Daddy?"_

 _Her father sighed and dropped to his knees so he was eye level with her._  " _Sammy…me and your mom, we…" he sighed and she thought he looked so sad. "I love your Mama, honey. And I love you and Mellie. We're a family and no matter what happens we'll always be family. Okay?" He tilted her chin and peered into her eyes. She wanted to cry but that would only make her daddy sadder, so she held Pippy tight and smiled up at her father._

" _I love you Daddy!" Holding Pippy under her arm, she wrapped her other arm around her father's neck._

" _I love you too Princess. Always"_

She swiped at her tears, taking one last look at the picture, before putting it back in its hiding place. She loved this picture, the only one left of her father. But the picture was a lie.

Her dad left the day after her birthday.

That night she and Melanie lay together in Sam's bed, their heads under the covers to drown out the sound of their parents fighting. Melanie was crying and Sam wanted to, but she couldn't. Daddy always said that Mellie wasn't strong like her, that it was Sam's job to take care of her since she was the big sister – by three minutes. She'd grabbed a flashlight and put it under her chin to make silly shadow faces – Melanie's favorite. If she were laughing the noise downstairs wouldn't seem as loud.

After a while Melanie had fallen asleep, but Sam was still awake…listening. She heard a door slam and then it was quiet. After a while she crept out of her bed, careful not to wake Melanie. Her nightgown dragged against the stairs as she tried to walk quietly. The house was dark. Her daddy said she'd been tough since the day she was born – nothing scared her. But tonight in the silence and the darkness, Sam was scared – and she didn't know why. Something just felt…wrong.

The light from the television flickered in the living room falling on her mother's face as she sat on the sofa; head in her hands. Beside her on the sofa was a picture frame. In it was a picture of a man and a woman, each holding identical, squirming blond toddlers who were no doubt trying to run into the water of the ocean that lay behind them. Sam didn't remember that picture. She didn't remember Mama and Daddy ever smiling with each other like that.

In front of Sam's mom, on the floor, was a bottle. It had tipped over and the liquid inside had made a brown pool on the cream carpet. The whole room smelled of it. She shifted her weight to her other foot, holding onto the edge of the bookcase she was hiding behind.

"You might as well come out." Her mother said, her head still in her hands, her voice slurred. "Come on out and sit beside Mama, baby."

Sam walked over to the sofa and climbed up onto the deep blue cushions, placing Pippy softly on the sofa beside her. Her mother reached out to smooth Sam's hair. Her eyes were red and her face was blotchy and stained with tears. She smelled bad. Like she did on the days that daddy told her and Melanie to stay upstairs, play quietly and not bother her.

She hadn't always looked like that. She remembered being really little, before she was old enough to go to school, when her mother used to hug her and Mellie. She used to smile a lot and her and daddy used to kiss when they thought she and Melanie weren't looking. But that seemed like a long time ago.

"I messed up Sammy" her mother's face crumpled and fresh tears traced their way down her cheeks.

Sam didn't know what to say. She wanted her daddy.

"Where's daddy, mama?"

Her mother cried audibly now; her shoulders shaking. Sam felt a scary tickle in the pit of her stomach.

"Mama? Where is daddy at? Where's Daddy?"

She was almost shouting now. Something was wrong.

"He's gone Sammy."

"Gone where, mama?"

"He's just gone…probably over with that tramp!" She spit out the last words with force and leaned down, unsteadily, to pick up the bottle she'd left discarded on the floor. She tilted the bottle back, draining the last of its contents.

Sam couldn't speak. Her daddy was gone and she was scared. She wanted him to be here. She wanted him to walk in the door and smile and pick her up and swing her in the air. She wanted him to come and whisper in her ear that this was all a dream.

"When is daddy coming back?"

Her mother looked at her, this time her red-rimmed eyes were angry. She chuckled but her laugh held no joy in it.

"Don't you get it kid? She threw the empty bottle back on the floor, making Sam flinch, "He's gone! Vamoosed! Adios! Elvis has left the building!" she was yelling now, attempting to stand on unsteady feet. Sam glanced toward the stairs, praying Mellie wasn't awake.

"He's gone…" her mother said, walking toward the room she used to share with Daddy, "and he ain't comin' back."

All of the color had gone out of the world. She couldn't breathe. She wanted to run outside and see if her daddy's truck was there. She'd squeezed her eyes tight and told herself over and over that it was all a terrible, terrible dream. But when she'd opened them she was still there, the light from the television casting shadows in the room. She should go upstairs and check on Mellie. She knew she should, but she couldn't.

She walked over to the door where daddy kept his jacket hung. It was the jacket he wore when they camped out in the backyard. She buried her face in the sleeve; it still smelled like him. She had to reach on her tiptoes to pull it from the hook. She wrapped it around herself, just like a royal cape. She lay down on the sofa, holding Pippy and the picture frame. She hadn't been aware that she was crying until she saw her reflection in the frame. Her eyes were red and her face was blotchy. She looked like Mama.

When Sam woke in the morning the house smelled different. Like Pine Sol. The dark spots on the floor were gone. When she looked by the door her daddy's work boots were gone. And his toolbox. There were bright spots on the walls were pictures used to hang. Pictures of him. Pictures of her family.

She'd gone to sleep someone's Princess, and woken up…alone.

Twelve years ago, and it still hurt like it was yesterday. She was crying freely now, not bothering to wipe her face as the tears pooled beneath her chin.

It had felt something like this when her dad left. Like the wind had been knocked out of her; like she'd lived a lie.

She'd known this would happen. She'd even tried to talk to Freddie about but he always said she was crazy. That he'd been around her for long enough to know who she was. That he didn't want her to change. But that was a lie. She'd heard the truth…in his silence. If he was too ashamed to defend her to his mother, who didn't know half of the things she'd done-not just to Freddie, then they didn't stand a chance once the rest of the world got to him.

She'd fought herself for months. Trying to tell herself that she and Freddie could work. That they could be good together; that she could be good with him- for him. But now she had to see what was true.

She'd been living in a fairytale. And it wasn't going to end in happily ever after.


	10. Turning Tables

_8:05am Freduccini: Someone's not getting n e pancakes ;p_

_8:34am Freduccini: Wake up Sam! ur bacon's getting cold!_

_9:15am Freduccini: Where r u? call me_

_10:45am Freduccini: WTH!_

_12:00pm Freduccini: This isn't funny Sam! Call me! Im worried!_

_2:00pm Carly: Freddie is freakin' out…Where r u?_

The texts went on like that all day. Every hour on the hour her phone buzzed with a new message. She'd read them all but couldn't bring herself to respond.

Around 3:00 she'd heard banging on her door. She'd crept to the window and peaked out the blinds, looking down at the porch below.

Carly and Freddie.

Carly looked annoyed…no doubt figuring that Sam was just being flaky and that Freddie was overreacting. Freddie looked worried, his brow furrowed as he looked into the windows on her porch. She shut her blinds before he could see her looking down on them. It took a full fifteen minutes for them to realize that no one was coming to the door and leave.

She didn't want anyone to worry. She just needed to be alone. She needed to figure out what to do.

Somewhere in her head she knew she'd been waiting for this day. She'd just hoped it wouldn't come so soon. She'd tried to tell him. Tried to warn him that as great as this was…the odds were against it lasting.

He never took her seriously.

She looked at the clock – four thirty – she had thirty minutes to get dressed and get to Bushwell Plaza or she'd be late for iCarly. She contemplated not going. Just staying here all day, with her head under the covers. But she knew that wouldn't work. Eventually she'd have to leave this house and deal with the situation. Eventually she'd have to see Freddie.

And that's when the really hard part would begin.

* * *

Ten minutes. iCarly started in ten minutes and still no sign of Sam. There'd been no sign of her all day. She hadn't shown up for breakfast, so he'd skipped the arts festival, thinking that maybe she'd show up later. She hadn't.

He'd been calling, texting, he'd even convinced Carly to come with him to her house.

Still no Sam.

He was vascilating between anger and concern. Right now anger was winning.

"This is freaking ridiculous!"

"Freddie calm down." Carly said, looking up from her notes for the show. She'd been just as worried as him earlier. Three meals today without Sam…that was not normal. And Freddie said he'd invited her to breakfast with pancakes… and bacon! Sam never turned down free food. But Sam had never missed an episode of iCarly…except when she'd gotten arrested for pouring beans down that diplomat's pants. Sam would be here…she hoped.

The elevator dinged and the opening door revealed a very much alive and unharmed Sam Puckett. She wore a look of cool nonchalance as she walked into the studio.

"What up peoples?"

"Sam! Where the hell have you been? We've been worried sick!" Freddie lowered his voice, stepping closer to her, "I've been worried sick…what happened to you?"

He reached out a hand to grab her arm.

She squirmed out of his grasp, picking up her blue sound remote control as she stood beside Carly.

"No big deal. I'm here now…can we get on with it?" her retort was absent of its usual bite and she'd yet to meet his eyes.

"Sam…" he started towards her.

"Freddie," Carly stood between them, "She's here now and she doesn't look wounded so let's just do the show. We can talk about this later." She was glad to see that Sam was okay. But the look on Sam's face told her that whatever had made her disappear all day was not something she wanted to talk about.

Freddie sighed in frustration and walked back to his cart, taking his camera from Brad, who was running the sound board.

"In five…four…three…two"

He spent the rest of the show studying her. To the millions of iCarly viewers everything probably looked normal. Sam and Carly were hilarious as usual; their new bit 'Are You Smarter Than A Gibby' was probably the funniest thing they'd done to date. But to someone who knew Sam it was obvious that something was wrong. He'd tried to get her to look at him during the video clip for 'Who's That Weirdo In My Neighborhood?' but she seemed determined to avoid his gaze.

"Dude, what's up with Sam?" Brad whispered to him, "She seems sort of off tonight. Trouble in paradise?"

Freddie could only shrug his shoulders. What was wrong with Sam? He didn't have a clue.

"Okay all you freaks and weirdos, that's it for this episode of iCarly."

"Not so fast Sam" Carly said, "We've got one more thing to do. Brad, grab the camera"

"Carly…" Sam whispered, a warning in her voice, "You'd better not be doing what I think you're doing."

"Shush" Carly whispered through clenched teeth, before turning back to the camera with a smile. "Tonight we have a very special treat for you. Freddie? Would you do the honors?" She waved Freddie toward her.

Carly had discussed this with Freddie before the show. He thought it was a bad idea; sure to piss Sam off. But right now he didn't care. She'd pissed him off too… and had him in a panic with worry. And if she'd been here when she was supposed to be she could have had a say in it. It wasn't his fault she'd flaked out.

He walked over to Sam, feeling her angry glare burning a hole in his shoulder.  
"Well, all you iCarly fans, for quite a while now a lot of you have been writing in asking if there is ever going to be an iCarly romance."

"Freddie…" Sam was shaking, "what are you doing?"

He ignored her. No turning back now.

"So tonight, we've got an announcement. Sam and I are…" he reached out to grab her hand.

Jerking away from Freddie Sam jumped in front of him, her arms spread wide as she leaned in to the camera…all smiles.

"We are happy to announce that Carly and Brad, our awesome fudge-makin' intern, officially a couple. Complete with goo-goo eyes and kissy faces. It's a Christmas miracle!" she cried. "Come on over here Carly!"

Carly eyes were wide with shock. She didn't mind if the iCarly viewers knew about her and Brad. But that was not the announcement that was supposed to be made! She walked stiffly to stand beside Freddie, who looked shell-shocked.

"So now that really is all for iCarly tonight! See you next week!"

"And we're clear" Brad said, dropping the camera from his shoulder, placing it on the cart.

The studio was silent.

"So…" Brad said, "that was…um… a good show."

Nothing.

"Carly…how crazy was that dancing hobo video?" his question seemed to break Carly out of her trance.

"Yeah…so funny" she said, looking back and forth between Sam and Freddie who stood on opposite sides of her. The room had the feeling of a battleground right before the war cry.

"Sam? What…was that?"

"Just drop it Carly."

"But Sam…"

"Carly! Seriously, just…."

Freddie, who had been standing still, fists clenched at his side, suddenly turned to the girls, his face bright red, and his eyes wild.

"She's right Carly. Just drop it! No big deal right Sam?" He moved past Carly to stand in front of Sam who, for the first time Carly could remembered, looked scared. "I mean, who cares that she just rejected me…in front of a million people! No big deal! She's Sam Puckett; she can do what she wants and fuck how anybody else feels!"

"Freddie…calm down." Carly reached out to touch his arm, trying to defuse the situation.

He shrugged her off, his shoulders shaking in anger.

"No Carly! I've had it!"

Sam took a step backward, still refusing to meet Freddie's eyes.

"Why Sam? Do you think this is funny? Is that all this has been to you? A big joke?" Sam was silent, "Look at me damn it!" He threw up his hands in frustration. "You know what? Screw it! I'm out of here" he stormed towards the door, flinging it open.

The sound of the slamming door echoed in the studio.

"So…I guess I should go, because…well, I don't want to be here for this" Brad said, grabbing his bag before exiting the door. He poked his head back in, "I'll call you later Carly."

Carly walked over and fell onto a beanbag. What the hell had just happened. Sam rejecting Freddie. Freddie screaming at Sam. Sam…not saying anything. She didn't even defend herself. Not one word.

Carly looked over at Sam, who hadn't moved from the spot she was in when Freddie stormed out. Carly had no idea what to say to her. She completely understood why Freddie was mad. Sam had humiliated him plenty of times, including telling the whole world that he'd never kissed anyone. But this was different. She'd seen the way Freddie looked at Sam, she knew how much he cared about her. For her to reject him, even if no one knew but the people in this room, was a hurt Carly couldn't imagine.

"Sam? Can we talk about this?"

Still unmoving, Sam's face gave nothing away, but when she spoke, her voice was shaking.

"There's nothing to talk about Carly."

"But Sam! You saw how mad Freddie was, I've never seen him like that?  _Why_  would you  _do that_ to him?"

"You don't understand Carly. You just…you couldn't understand."

"Maybe I would…or maybe I wouldn't, it really doesn't matter how I feel about it. What about Freddie? You can't just let him walk out like that. You have to find him!"

Sam looked over to meet Carly's concerned gaze. And this time her face couldn't hide what she was feeling; her eyes were filling with tears as she struggled to keep her voice steady.

"I can't." She walked toward the door.

"Sam, wait!" she stood from the floor, walking toward Sam who paused with her hand on the doors handle, her back to Carly.

"No Carly! I know you're only trying to help, but you can't fix it…I can't fix it. Not this time. It's over." Opening the door, she left, leaving Carly standing in the studio alone…and confused.

* * *

Sam walked slowly down the stairs, crossing Carly's living room and praying that Spencer didn't make an appearance. She couldn't talk to him right now. There was something she needed to do and she was scared that if she waited any longer she'd lose her nerve.

Exiting Apartment 8C, she paused in the hallway trying to clear her head. Why had Carly done that? Her decision was already hard enough, but now, now it was that much harder.

She knew where to find him. The same place she'd found him a thousand times before, the same place she found him the other time she had hurt him so badly live online, more than two years ago. It was their place. She walked toward the fire escape and found herself hoping that he wouldn't be there. Hoping that maybe she didn't know him as well as she thought. That maybe he'd found another hiding spot, that maybe she could put this off one more day.

Sliding open the window she peered out into the Seattle night hesitantly. The strains of John Mayer's "Heartbreak Warfare" filled the small space. In the darkness she almost didn't see him.

"I knew you'd come" his voice was soft; the anger from only moment ago replaced with resignation. "Why are you here?"

She stepped out onto the landing, peering behind the stairs towards his voice. He sat on the ground, knees drawn up against his chest. His shoulders slumped as he toyed with a white envelope he held in his hands.

She moved towards him slowly, running over in her head the words she'd determined she had to say but as he turned his head to look at her, his brown eyes searching hers in hope… and fear, she lost the ability to speak. No matter what she said, one of them would be unhappy. Which meant that both of them would be unhappy.

Gathering her nerve she ducked beneath the stairs and crouched down beside him. He moved over soundlessly, making room for her. They sat in silence for what felt like an eternity, only the music and the sounds of Seattle at night surrounding them.

_Lightning strikes  
Inside my chest to keep me up at night  
Dream of ways  
To make you understand my pain_

"Freddie"… "Sam" they spoke in unison.

"You go first," she said. It only made sense. Once she'd finished what she'd come to say she didn't think she'd have the courage to stay.

He flipped the envelope over and over in his hands before passing it to her.

"I got this for you. Go ahead, take it" he insisted as Sam's hand hesitated over it. She opened it slowly, and lifted her head to peer at him in confusion. "Prom tickets." He laughed, "After the other night I thought…I thought you'd want to go…with me." He looked over to her, "shows how much I knew, huh?"

"Freddie…"

He laughed to himself.

"You know I was actually looking forward to it? Prom I mean. Even though I knew you'd say it was lame. And tell me I was wearing a monkey suit. And complain about the pictures. I still knew it'd be magic. Because I would be with you."

_Clouds of sulfur in the air  
Bombs are falling everywhere  
It's heartbreak warfare  
Once you want it to begin,  
No one really every wins  
In heartbreak warfare_

"I don't get it Sam. I really don't. I've been sitting out here and no matter how hard I try to understand it, I just can't. What happened? One minute we're laughing and spending time together and …happy! And then the next you're hiding again and running away and… what was that in there? Are you really that ashamed of me? Because I could have sworn that I wasn't the only one who wanted this!"

"Freddie…it's not that. I want…"

"You want? You want! Why is it always that Sam! Why is it always about what you want! What you need! What about me? What about what I want? Doesn't that matter? Don't  _I_  matter?"

"You don't know what you want" she stood up and walked out from under the stairs. She couldn't breathe. She needed air.

Freddie followed her, turning her arm, forcing her to face him.

"What the hell are you talking about? I'm not the one who's confused here! I know what I want… I want you!"

"Even if I'm a delinquent? Even if I'm the no-good a daughter of a whore whose had more than one stint in juvie? Is that what you want?" Her words were rushed, hurt turning them venomous.

"I've never said that about you!"

"But you think it! Everyone thinks it! So you can say that you don't care, that you don't want me to change, that it doesn't matter but it will! Sooner or later it will."

"Sam, I don't care what anyone else thinks. Don't you get that by now! It doesn't matter to me what they say because they don't know you Sam, but I do! What they think about you isn't real, it isn't who you really are… this is real Sam." He said, placing her hand over his heart. We're real!"

_Clouds of sulfur in the air  
Bombs are falling everywhere  
It's heartbreak warfare  
Once you want it to begin,  
No one really ever wins  
In heartbreak warfare._

"Why can't you just let it go? Don't you see? This can't work! This was never going to work! We're from two different worlds. We don't fit. We don't make sense!"

"We make sense to me!"

"Now! But what happens later? What happens when you wake up and you see that I'm not who you think I am? What happens when you see that maybe everything people say about me is true. Maybe that _is_  who I am? Then what, Freddie? I'll tell you what. You're gonna leave! That's how this freakin' fairytale ends! It was going to happen that way right from the start!"

_If you want more love,  
why don't you say so?  
If you want more love,  
why don't you say so?  
Just say so..._

"Sam…this is crazy! I'm not going anywhere. There isn't anywhere I'd rather be or anyone I'd rather be with than you! You're it for me! This isn't just some casual thing for me Sam! I'm not doing this just for something to do, or just to 'try it out'! I'm in love with you damn it! Why can't you see that?"

She flinched at the force of his voice. He took his hand from her arm, raising it to cup her chin, turning her face toward him.

" I'm not going anywhere. I couldn't walk away from you if I tried! Every single day we're together you manage to do something to make me a little more proud to be with you. I'm proud of you – proud of us!"

Sam jerked her face from his hand, her eyes flashing in anger.

"Bullshit Freddie! Bullshit! You're a liar, just like the rest of them. This isn't real! This is a lie. I heard you!"

"What the hell are you talking about Sam?"

"This morning in your room with your mom. I heard you Freddie."

"I don't understand?"

"What's to understand? Your mom hates me…like just about everyone else. And she stood there and told you everything that was wrong with me, every flaw, every issue, and you…you didn't say a  _thing_. You just  _sat_  there. So sue me if I have a hard time believing that you're so happy with me, that you love me just like I am. That you've meant anything you've said to me in the last three months. Because I don't buy it Freddie!"

"Sam...you've got it wrong! You didn't hear everything!"

"I heard plenty…"

"You've got to listen to me, it's not what you think!"

He sounded desperate, just like she felt. She was desperate to get this over, to escape this space where her love for him and the pain of losing him were both threatening to drown her.

"I can't do this anymore."

"What are you saying! What do you mean you can't do this anymore?"

"You know what I mean Freddie, please don't make this any harder than it already is."

_Push it in and twist the knife again  
Watch my face  
As I pretend to feel no pain_

"Don't make it harder? For you! Are you fucking kidding me? You're standing here, ripping my heart out and you want me to make it easy for you? How can I do that? How can I make it easy for you to walk away?"

Her heart was shattering and if she stood here for one minute longer she'd break into a million pieces. She wanted to reach out to him, to wrap her arms around him and tell him that's she'd never leave. She wanted to stare into his eyes until she could believe that real love shone there. She'd known love before. The kind of all-encompassing feeling that made you wonder how you'd live without that person.

And she knew how it felt to watch that love walk away. She couldn't do that again. She couldn't watch him walk away.

" _Men don't stay with girls like us."_

_"Never let them walk away first."_

Her mother's voice rang in her ears, echoing through her – soul deep.

"I have to go…" She turned so that he wouldn't see her eyes, and the tears behind them she was straining to contain.

_How come the only way to know how high you get me  
is to see how far I fall  
God only knows how much I'd love you if you let me  
but I can't break through it all._

"Sam, please." His voice was thick with emotion, straining against the pain he felt. He reached out for her hand, taking it in his, trying to turn her around. "Please don't do this. I'm begging you. You have to listen to me, Princess."

With one word he'd made it all clear for her.

Princess. She'd been someone's Princess once.

"I'm sorry." She said, her voice hushed. She was holding onto her emotions by a thread and if she spoke any louder she knew she'd completely fall apart.

She rushed toward the window, scrambling inside and closing it behind her. Her small frame fit easily through, she knew he couldn't follow her as quickly.

"Sam…Sam wait! Sam!"

She heard him screaming her name through the plates of glass; the sound of his pain growing faint as she rushed toward the stairs.

* * *

She started running as soon as she hit the sidewalk. She didn't stop when her breath hitched and her side ached. She didn't stop when her vision blurred as the tears she'd tried so hard to fight rushed down her face. She didn't stop until she was home, behind the closed door of her room.

In the silence of her house she let herself come undone completely. She screamed out her pain, sobs wracking her small frame. She cried until she had no tears left. She tried to tell herself that she'd done the right thing. It would have only ended badly later, but her heart rebelled against that version of the truth and she was overcome with longing and loss.

She justified it…he would have left her anyway. Sooner or later. He was better off this way…everyone was better off this way.

_She's a delinquent_

_Yes, yes…she's done all of the things you said_

A weight of sadness settled over her, making it hard to breathe.

_She's a whore_

_Yes, yes…she's all of the things you say. She's not what I want. She's not what I want_

Her mind toyed with her…twisting words…blurring the line between the real and

Imagined. She grabbed Pippy from under her pillow, reaching inside, drawing out the picture.

" _Me, you, your mama and Mellie are a family. We'll always be a family"_

" _You're my Princess, always…"_

She screamed out her agony as she tore at the picture in her hand, until only shreds were left.

Lies. All lies.

She was no one's Princess anymore.


	11. Hole in the World

Four days, eight hours, and sixteen minutes. That's how long it had been since his world fell apart. If he had to he could probably count the seconds …373,440; he'd felt agony in every one of them. And he learned something in that time. The world didn't stop just because he was dying inside.

When he was little, his mom used to read him nursery rhymes at night. His favorite was Humpty Dumpty. He and Humpty had a lot of common these days. Ever since the 'incident' with Sam, which is what Carly had taken to calling it, everyone had been walking around on eggshells, trying to put him back together. For the first couple of days it was nice to have people care. His mom made sure he ate. Carly had come by every day, sometimes he talked but mostly he just sat and pretended to listen to whatever she talked about. Gibby and Brad had come by and played video games with him, on their way out mentioning as nicely as possible that he might want to think about taking a shower. If it hadn't been for all of them he'd probably be sitting mute in his room, hungry, lonely, and smelling like an old sweat sock. He was glad to have friends like them, but they were starting to annoy him.

Every day from everyone it was the same question:  _How are you?_ How the hell did they think he was? As Sam would have said, he was jacked; completely and totally screwed. Sam was the first girl he'd ever really loved, unless you counted Carly, which he didn't. And she was gone. No real explanation, no warning; just over. They all expected him to get over it. They acted like this had merely been a quick fling that suddenly rose up and just as quickly flamed out, not something that he had been feeling, albeit at a low level and mostly out of sight, for much longer.

They could not have been more wrong. Losing Sam was like losing the heart in his chest…and he didn't know how anyone got over that.

_You're such a girl_

That's what Sam would say if she could see him now. He could almost hear her saying it in his head. That happened a lot now…hearing her voice. It was probably a little crazy, or a lot crazy, but he didn't care; it was his way of keeping her with him even if she'd chosen to leave.

He hadn't seen or talked to her since it happened. She was mysteriously absent from school on Monday and Tuesday, and part of him was relieved. He wasn't sure what he'd do when he saw her again. He wasn't ready to find out. He knew that she had been to Carly's house. He'd purposely stayed away. It was funny; he'd accused her of doing exactly what he was doing now – hiding, but going to Carly's and seeing Sam there was too dangerous. Maybe he'd go and she'd act like he wasn't even there, or maybe she'd go back to the Sam she'd been before all this started. He wasn't sure which idea bothered him more; her ignoring him or pretending nothing had ever happened, so he just avoided it altogether.

Today his game of hide and seek would end – not because he wanted it to – but because yesterday Principal Franklin had told Carly to give Sam a message: she'd reach her limit of unexcused absences. If she wasn't in school today he'd be forced to send her to summer school. He would have to see Sam today and there were two reasons that made him sure of it. One, Sam's mom had moved on from the doctor to a blackjack dealer – so Sam's access to bogus doctor's excuses was over. Second, Sam hated school so, to her, summer school was an abomination. To lose the three months they gave her off from 'that prison' would be unthinkable. She would definitely be there today, and that thought made him want to crawl under the covers and hide until summer started.

"Freddie! Breakfast!" His mother yelled from the kitchen. "You'd better hurry or you're going to be late for school"

His mother. He dreaded being in the same room with her anymore. It wasn't anything she said. She was surprisingly quiet about the situation, but he kept catching her staring at him; at dinner, while he watched TV, and it was always with something that struck him as pity, which was the last thing he needed right now.

Oh well. No sense putting it off. This was likely to be the worst day on record and the sooner he got it over with the sooner he could come back to the comforting solitude of his room.

"I'm coming" he yelled back, grabbing his book bag and heading for the door. He was wearing stripes today. Sam hated stripes. He'd spent the last couple months shoving all his striped shirts to the back of his closet, in an effort not to piss her off. He figured it didn't matter anymore. He was no longer under any obligation to the whims of Samantha Puckett.

He paused in front of his closet, groaned in frustration and stripped off his striped shirt, replacing it with a light blue polo.

Old habits die hard.

His mother was already sitting at the table eating breakfast when he took a seat across from her. He immediately dug into his cereal, grimacing at the taste but determined not to meet her gaze. But even as he attempted to ignore her, he could feel her gaze burning into him.

"Fredward…"

"Mom, I don't want to talk about it, at least not right now. And I don't want to listen to you talking about it. Let's just forget it" Why not, he thought, Sam probably already had.

"I'm so sorry Freddie Bear."

"Argh!" He groaned, "Mom, please don't do this. I don't want to talk about it!"

"It might help you to talk about it…get it off your chest"

His anger boiled over. Four days of the hurt and confusion he'd tried so hard to suppress rose to the surface. He threw his spoon down into his cereal bowl, sending milk flying over the table, onto his shirt.

"What do you want me to say Mom! Do you want me to tell you that Sam took my heart, threw it on the ground and stomped on it? Do you want me to tell you how horrible I feel? How the pain gnaws at me every freaking second of every day until I think I'll go crazy? Or maybe you want me to tell you that you were right; that she was right? That this whole thing was a giant mistake; that it was all some colossal joke the universe is playing on me? What's the point, huh mom? It doesn't matter anymore. Sam is gone, and she's not coming back." He slumped in his seat; his shoulders drooped in defeat, a single tear running down his left cheek. "She was right, ma. This wasn't real. It was just a stupid fairytale."

His mother didn't say anything. She just looked at him intently, reaching across the table to grab his hand.

"Freddie, I'm so sorry this happened to you. I've spent your whole life trying to protect you from being hurt but the truth is that I may be able to prevent your body from being hurt, but I don't have much control over your heart. Heartbreak happens to everyone. What happened with Samantha…"

"Mom, I really don't need to hear your 'I told you so!'" He jerked his hand away from her grasp, grabbing his cereal bowl to put it in the sink.

"Freddie, honey, I never said anything like that." She followed him out of the kitchen. "Let me finish!"

He stopped at the kitchen doorway, his back to her.

"What happened with Samantha was … unfortunate. Am I happy with the girl? No! But…things aren't always what they seem in situations like this Fredward."

He couldn't believe it. His mother was defending Sam? Now he'd really heard it all.

"Freddie, the other night when you told me about you and Samantha I saw something in you I'd never seen before. I saw the way you defended her, the way you protected her. I saw how strong you were…and I was so proud. Proud of the man you're becoming; the kind of man who's willing to stand up for what he believes in no matter who disagrees with him." She reached out to touch his arm, "You say that maybe the whole thing was a fairlytale…maybe you're right. But that doesn't mean it wasn't real."

He sighed deeply, trying to maintain control of his emotions. Pretending was the only thing that was keeping him sane right now. Pretending that he and Sam had never happened, pretending he didn't miss her, pretending his heart wasn't breaking. He couldn't listen to his mom – it would upset the already fragile balance of his emotions. Listening to her might stir the hope in his heart that she was right, and hope was a luxury he couldn't afford.

"I gotta go mom, I'm gonna be late for school" He grabbed his backpack and left the house, leaning against the closed door to regain his composure.

He knocked on the door to Carly's apartment so they could walk to school together. He really hoped that she'd lay off the interrogation today, he just didn't have the energy to endure it. Spencer answered the door.

"What's up kid? Looking for Carly?"

"Yeah, is she ready for school yet?" He walked inside behind Spencer, setting his book bag on the sofa.

"Um…Carly isn't here Freddo. She…had something to do this morning" Spencer stood awkwardly, as if delivering lines he'd been forced to rehearse.

"Where is she?"

"Well… she had to go do…a thing, at um… a place, with, like…a person" Spencer was obviously uncomfortable.

"She went to Sam's, right?"

"Yeah, she went to… over there, with…"

"Sam! Her name is Sam! You can say her name…I'm not going to crack up just because you said her name!" Freddie was annoyed, which didn't happen with Spencer often, no matter how completely ridiculous Spencer generally was. He was annoyed because, once again, everyone was acting like he was on suicide watch. Like just mentioning Sam's name might send him straight to Troubled Waters!

"I'm outta here" he grabbed his stuff and headed for the door.

"Freddo, wait…" Spencer stopped him at the door.

"Spencer, not another 'the sun will come out tomorrow' speech. Please?" He pleaded, before entering the elevator, leaving Spencer standing at the open door.

This was going to be a long day.

* * *

She'd been to Sam's house twice in the last few weeks. That was a record, but today she was on a mission. She approached the front door of the Puckett residence and rang the doorbell, hearing a loud screech from Sam's cat Frothy inside. Carly generally considered herself an animal lover, but that cat was disturbing. With a missing leg, patches of missing fur, a tail bent at an awkward angle, and a constant stream of mysterious foam coming from his mouth, the cat seemed not to have one redeemable quality. Sam had loved him since she'd found him on her porch five years ago, and if it could be believed, he'd looked even worse then. But Sam took him in. She said it was because he wouldn't leave after she'd shared her sandwich with him, but Carly knew that wasn't why. As tough as Sam was, she had a soft spot for things and people that the world had given up on. Carly suspected that was where her obsession with hobos came from.

She rang the bell again, more insistently this time and still had her finger on it when the door swung open.

"Well if it isn't Senorita Prissy Pants herself, in the flesh…" Sam's mom eyed Carly's thin frame. "What little of it there is. Seriously, do you eat?"

Sam's mom stood aside to let Carly in, smiling. Carly had learned that, like Sam, sarcasm was Pam Puckett's native tongue – something she did on reflex that was often not a true reflection of how she felt about you. If you got past the predatory obsession with men, her penchant for wearing clothes that weren't exactly…flattering, and her general lack of mothering instincts, she wasn't all that bad.

"Hi Mrs. Puckett."

"Pam…Mrs. Puckett is my mother…and she only wishes she had a body like this!"

Carly tried not to look at Pam. She was sure that even at 7:00 in the morning, she was wearing something under that robe that was sure to offend.

"Okay…Pam. Um… is Sam here?"

"Is she here? Where else would she be? She's spent the last three days holed up in that room, walking around this house like she lost her best friend. You ever try to get lucky with a moody teenager hanging around?" She looked at Carly as if she expected an answer.

"Um…no?"

"Well it ain't easy, let me tell ya. She is seriously putting cramp in my style if you know what I mean."

"Okay, well…I'm just gonna go up and talk to Sam. It was, um…nice, talking to you Mrs. Pu…Pam." Carly fled the living room, leaving Pam on the sofa, screaming at the television. If anyone ever wondered how Sam got to be the way she was, they really should pay her mom a visit.

Carly knocked lightly on the door to Sam's room. The door opened and Carly stared in shock. Sam was awake, and dressed and possibly even showered. She'd been expecting to have to come up here, drag her from the bed, throw her in the shower, then force her out of the house and to school. After their conversation last night when Carly had explained Principal Franklin's message she honestly didn't think it would make much difference to Sam. True, she hated school, so summer school was a powerful threat indeed, but, these days Sam didn't seemed to care about much of anything. So seeing her standing in the middle of her room, apparently ready to go, was a shock.

"Wow Sam, you're ready…already?"

"No point putting it off. And I'd rather boil my eyeballs in vinegar than spend a perfect good summer in academic hell." She grabbed her bag from its hook by her closet. "You ready Shay?"

She looked bad. And Carly didn't think there was really a nice way to say it. Her eyes had dark circles under them, like she hadn't slept in weeks. Her hair was an even wilder mess than usual; Carly wondered when she'd last brushed it. She started to ask her if she was okay but thought better of it. There was no point. Sam was very obviously not okay.

"I came early because I figured I'd have to wake you up. So we have some time before we have to leave. So…do you want to talk?"

Sam groaned, here it was. She loved Carly to death but the girl was completely incapable of letting go…of anything!

"Carls… we've already talked. We talked so much I'm tired of hearing my own voice!" 'And yours too she thought', "There isn't anything to say. Freddie and I were together, and now we're not. That's it. What else is there to talk about?"

"How about why? I mean…I still don't get it Sam. I know you said you both just agreed you were better off as friends, but I've seen Freddie and he doesn't look like a guy who "mutually agreed" to anything. He looks like a guy whose pet cow was run over by a tractor!  _You_  did this. And I want to know why!"

"Carly…please, not today. I can't do this today." Sam, dropped onto her bed, praying that, for once, Carly would just drop it.

No such luck.

"I'm sorry Sam, I'm not trying to meddle."

"And yet…here you are"

Carly sat beside her friend, searching for the words to say. This whole Sam and Freddie situation was such a mess. Just when she'd gotten used to the idea that her two best friends were in love…with each other, it was over. Just like that. She'd actually been making prom plans for the three of them when she'd found out. Sam had walked into her house, and Carly knew immediately that something was wrong. Sam had stood by the door, not flopping down on the sofa or going to raid their refrigerator like she normally would.

"Freddie and I are over. I just thought you should know" she'd said woodenly, giving Carly the obviously false "mutually agreed upon break-up" excuse before turning and leaving. Carly had been in too much shock to even follow her and all the texts she'd sent the rest of the day had gone unanswered. Freddie was no better. Her texts to him gave no information.

Carly: Sam just left here. What happened?

Freddie: What did she tell you?

Carly: That you both agreed you'd be better off as friends…

Freddie: Then I guess that's what happened.

Carly: You guess?

Freddie: Just leave it be Carly…I gotta go

She'd continued texting him for thirty minutes but he'd ignored her. These two were almost as secretive in their breakup as they'd been in their relationship.

Carly sat in silence watching Sam. She was tapping her foot on the floor, her trademark nervous twitch, and staring at her feet. Carly looked around Sam's room. It was a series of contradictions, just like Sam. The furniture was white and far more girly than anything one would imagine Sam having. The edges were finished with ornate carvings trimmed in pink but her bedding was red and black, skulls and crossbones criss-crossing it with the words 'Born Bad'. On her desk were pictures, tons of them, some in funny frames, some just taped to the edges of the shelves. The smiling faces of Sam, Carly, Freddie—she'd never truly realized just how many were of Freddie until now—Spencer, even Gibby looked out from them. Gibby would be amazed to know the Sam had pictures of him in her room – even if most of them were of Gibby at his…Gibbiest.

She looked to Sam's nightstand, a jumble of old papers, fat cake wrappers and what looked like small firecrackers. Leave it to Sam to have explosives at her bedside. In the middle of the chaos Carly spied black and white fur.

Pippy.

She remembered the first time she'd seen Pippy. It was a rare occasion when Carly had come for a sleepover. In the morning she' d woke first and been shocked and amused to find Sam snuggled up with a small stuffed panda. Sam was not the stuffed animal type. Sam had woke to find Carly staring at her and her face flushed as she realized that Carly had seen Pippy. After much teasing from Carly, Sam had explained exactly what Pippy was. Carly had never laughed about it again and in the years that followed she could always gauge the extent of a crisis by whether or not Pippy was present.

Pippy was on the nightstand, not under the pillow where he normally resided. So this situation with Sam and Freddie was serious…more serious than Sam was letting on.

Carly leaned over to the nightstand and held the small, worn panda in her hands.

"So…Pippy's out."

Sam glanced toward Carly. She'd meant to put Pippy back this morning. She's been sleeping with him every night now, the picture she'd shredded was taped back together and once again hidden in his cotton stuffing.

"Yeah…" Sam didn't know what to say. Carly knew her, so she knew that if Pippy was out, something was wrong. Really wrong. But she didn't even know how to begin to explain it all. She wasn't sure she even understood it herself. "I just…I guess I needed him."

"So, this thing with Freddie…" she trailed off, unsure of how to pose her question.

"He bought that for me when they brought me and Melanie home from the hospital. He said I slept with it every night from then on. I couldn't say "pretty" when I was little, so I called him Pippy. My dad used to call him my faithful sidekick." She smiled, but no light reached her eyes.

"Sam…"

"He used to sit out on my bed. And at night when dad read me a story, he'd tuck Pippy in the bed with me. He'd even kiss us both goodnight. 'One for the Princess, and one for Pippy too'." Her eyes had a faraway look in them, as if she was there again, five years old and watching her father tuck her in for the night. "He didn't tuck us in that night. The night he…left. It was like I went to bed and the next morning he'd just …vanished. My mom said that it was too much to deal with."

"Sam. Your dad leaving…it's not… it wasn't your fault."

"I guess I know that…somewhere. But in my head I just wonder…how did he walk away? I was a brat as a kid, always getting in trouble, screwing something up…just like now. But…he was still there, always there until one day…when he just…wasn't." her voiced lowered to a whisper. "And I think sometimes…if he could leave…just walk away from me…why would anyone else stay?" She stared at her hands in her lap, blinking back tears.

Carly turned to her, grabbing her hand and squeezing it.

"Sam. Freddie…is not your father."

"I know Carly. And that's the problem. He left. My own father, he didn't think I was important enough to stick around for. It was his job to love me, to be here for me and it still wasn't enough to make him stay. Freddie has a million totally valid reasons to not be with me, and there are a ton of people who could give him a million more. How could that have worked? How could I just stand by and wait for him to see that I'm not good enough for him? I couldn't do it Carly. I'm not going to stand here and hold my breath until it happens again."

"Oh Sam… don't you get it? You've spent all this time waiting for Freddie to hurt you, ready for him to leave. You were so convinced that it couldn't work that you did to him exactly what you feared he'd do to you…you left."

Sam felt the ache in her heart spread as her mind scrambled for a reason Carly was wrong. A way to justify the mess she'd made. But hurt is a cunning thing, twisting the truth and clouding reality until you gladly cling to the even the darkest of lies.

"You don't understand…"

"I know. That's what you keep telling me, and it's ridiculous Sam! Do you think you're the only one who hurts? Do you think you have a monopoly on pain?" She raised her voice, more in frustration than anger. "We all hurt Sam, everyone. And I know what it feels like to lose…" her cracked as tears began to rise in her eyes. "someone important. I know what kind of pain that is."

"I'm sorry Carls…I didn't mean…"

"I know what you meant Sam. And I know that you weren't thinking about the fact that Freddie and I have both lost parents too. That's the problem Sam… you aren't thinking! Maybe Freddie and I didn't lose our parents the same way you did…but that doesn't make it hurt any less. There isn't a day that goes by when I don't think about my mom, and wish she was here. I wish she could see Spencer and how great he is at taking care of me. I wish she could meet you and Freddie and see what we've done with iCarly. And for a long time I let that hurt change me, make me believe it was pointless to get close to anyone because of how bad it would hurt to lose them. But that was wrong. Loving someone is never the wrong thing…neither is letting someone love you. I know you love Freddie, Sam. Now... let him love  _you_."

The two girls fell into silence, each lost in her own thoughts.

Carly wondered if she'd gotten through to Sam. She loved Sam, who was more of a sister than a friend. And she wanted more than anything to make her pain go away. But she knew that this was something Sam was going to have to do on her own. She'd trapped herself in a prison built of lies, hurt and fear but she was the only one with the power to set herself free.

"Come on…we'd better get going. I promised Principal Franklin I'd get you to school on time." She reached for Sam's hand, pulling her to stand. When she went to let go she felt Sam's arms around her. Hugs were rare with Sam.

"Thanks kid" the sound of Sam's voice was muffled in Carly's shoulder, "for…everything. Now let's go, before I change my mind and have to spend my summer with Briggsy!" she pulled away from Carly, grabbed her bag and stood to the side as Carly exited the door.

This was going to be a long day.

* * *

Carly had once watched Gibby break into a half-naked dance in the middle of the Cheesecake Warehouse. The cops had been called and the manager had thrown them out, dragging a struggling Gibby out of the door as he screamed "I gotta dance!" It was awkward to say the least, but she'd relive that moment a million times over if it meant she could avoid the awkwardness that was Sam and Freddie right now.

When they'd arrived at school Freddie was already there and what had happened next could only be described as a standoff. Freddie stood in the middle of the hall, staring at Sam who had quit moving as soon as she rounded the corner and saw his face.

"Ooo…staring contest!" Gibby said, walking up to Carly, "I got next!"

"Gibby!" she said, giving Sam a nudge, trying to get her moving. The push seemed to bring her back to her senses and she moved toward her locker, head down, saying nothing.

Her movement had a similar effect on Freddie and, though he remained in the middle of the hallway, he offered a nervous greeting.

"Hey Gib, Carly…Sam" He glanced at her quickly.

"Hey…Nub" Sam called over her shoulder, still refusing to meet his gaze.

She was back to calling him names, but something still seemed off. The usual bite was missing – she was off her game.

Carly stood at her locker, gathering her books and thinking about her friends. This was so ridiculous. She slammed her locker, ready to tell them both what she thought of the mess they'd made when Principal Franklin's voice came out over the loud speaker.

"Carly Shay, Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson … please report to the principal's office."

On reflex they all turned to look at Sam.

"What!" she said, "I haven't even been here this week…it's not me, I swear!"

Carly turned from her locker and followed Sam and Freddie toward Principal Franklin's office.

This day was just getting better and better.

Entering the office, Sam returned a hello to all of the secretaries; she'd been there enough that they all knew her, there was even a large cabinet labeled "Samantha Puckett" where they stored all of the items they'd confiscated from her. She was something of a regular.

"Sam, Carly, Freddie…you can go right in. Principal Franklin is waiting for you."

Carly nodded and followed Sam through the door and into Principal Franklin's office. He sat with his back to them, turning to them briefly and raising a finger before returning to his phone call.

"Yes, I understand Superintendent…I think this will be a wonderful way to promote our school…No they haven't agreed, but I feel certain that they will. What's that?... yes, I assume she'll be there as well…No, I don't think extra security guards will be necessary…Okay, I'll let you know as soon as I've spoken to them. Goodbye."

He turned around to face the trio, his face holding its usual friendly smile.

Carly…Freddie, thank you for coming. Samantha…glad to see you back with us. Couldn't tolerate the idea of summer school, huh." Sam shook her head. "Ah, I thought you'd see reason".

Sam leaned back in her seat, propping her feet onto Principal Franklin's desk.

"So what's up Ted, why'd you want to see us?" she asked

"Oh, well as you heard, I was just on the phone with the superintendent and we have come up with an idea that we think you'll love…or we hope you will. You see, there have been all sorts of budget cuts in the school district. One of the ways we offset those is with the money we raise from fundraisers and extra-curricular things… like school dances. Prom is usually a pretty big money maker, but apparently – unbeknownst to me- school dances have become…'lame'" he said, adding air quotes.

"So how can we help you with that?" Carly asked

"Well, we were thinking that since you host a very popular webshow, maybe you'd consider hosting a special edition of iCarly…live from the Ridgeway Prom!" He looked between Carly, Freddie and Sam with excitement. "Doesn't that sound fun?"

"If by fun you mean the lamest of the lame things we could ever do then absolutely…that sounds like a blast." Sam said sarcastically, twirling a piece of hair around her finger.

"Sam!"

"What? You can't tell me you actually want to do this? I mean… you don't really want to do this!"

"Just because you don't want to do it, doesn't mean no one else does. Oh, I forgot, you like to make decisions for other people." Freddie bit back at her, his eyes narrowed.

"Watch it…" Sam warned, standing to her feet.

"Or what! What can you do worse than you've already done?" Freddie stood too, daring her to answer him.

"Whoa! Sam, Freddie…settle down!" Principal Franklin said.

They stood staring at each other for a full minute, neither of them willing to be the first to back down. Strange the way that hurt can make love look like hate.

"Sam…" Carly pleaded, knowing that this game of wills could go on forever, "Please… just sit down."

Sam began to lower herself in to her seat.

"Alright Carly… for you!" she added finally.

"Of course, why would you do anything for me?" Freddie said before sitting down, a smirk on his face. He'd won, but the victory felt hollow.

Carly raised her hand to silence Sam before she could say anything in response to Freddie's purposely hurtful comment.

"So, Principal Franklin. You want us to film iCarly from the prom? And you think that will help you sell more tickets?"

Ted Franklin was staring at Sam and Freddie. He'd been their Principal for three years, if you didn't count the time he'd been replaced for a week, and he didn't. In that time he'd witnessed his fair share of fights between the two of them. Sam usually won but even then their arguments always had seemed more like banter than anything truly mean spirited. And for the most biting comments to come from Freddie Benson, well that was truly a shock. Freddie was a good boy; mild mannered, clean, polite and fiercely loyal to the two girls sitting on either side of him. He wondered what could have happened to change that.

"Yes Carly, that's exactly what we'd like and we're sure that you filming iCarly here would make the prom a phenomenal success. So what do you say?"

He glanced nervously between Sam and Freddie, who both seemed to be seething with anger, before looking to Carly. The superintendent was really pressuring him to make this happen which was interesting since he'd fired Ted for being on iCarly not long ago.

"Well, can you give us a minute to talk it over…alone?"

"Sure thing, I'll just be right outside. Try not to let them..."

"Kill each other?" Carly said, "I don't think I can make any promises"

He shook his head before exiting, closing the door softly behind him.

Carly walked over and stood in between Sam and Freddie, perching on the edge of Principal Franklin's desk.

"Alright, listen. This is ridiculous. You guys are miserable and you're making everyone around you miserable…it's got to stop, now!"

She looked between them to see if they understood.

"He started it!"

"What! I started it? You must have short term memory loss Puckett… this whole thing is because of you!"

"Great here we go again…let's dump it all on Sam, it's all my fault…"

"Ha! Dump! That's an excellent choice of words!"

Carly grabbed the bullhorn sitting on the edge of the desk and screamed into it.

"ENOUGH!" Now they'd even pissed her off. "That's enough. You…" she pointed at Sam, "shut up… I mean it… not another word!" Freddie snickered, "And you too Mr. Moody McGrumpy Pants! Enough yelling at Sam! You shut up too!"

They both sat back in their seats, annoyance apparent on their faces, but they didn't say a word.

The door creaked open and Ms. Lessner, Principal Franklin's secretary peeked her head around it.

"Um... Carly? Principal Franklin told me to tell you… off the record… that there's a can of mace in his bottom drawer… in case you need it." She shut the door firmly behind her.

Satisfied that's she'd be able to get a word in, Carly sat the bullhorn down on the desk.

"Okay. Now I know things are… bad, between the two of you right now. I don't know why and it really doesn't matter because at this point the one thing I'm certain of is that both of you are being really stupid! We've been friends for a long time and I'm not willing to let that get all messed up just because the two of you can't get past whatever it is that happened. I also know that both of you are hurt and that' s why you're acting like angry lunatics. You're ripping each other to shreds and you're not even considering that you're not the only ones that hurt when you do that… it hurts me too! I know that whatever is wrong with you guys can't get fixed overnight but you're going to have to figure out a way to at least be in the same room without killing each other or making everyone else want to leave!"

She looked at them both, waiting for their answer. Freddie finally broke the silence.

"I can't make any promises Carly. But I'll try…if she will"

"Yeah…I'll try." Sam said, reluctantly.

"Great. Now about this prom thing. I think it's a great idea, we'd planned on doing an iCarly special soon anyway and it could be cool. I hear they're going to do some live music and they're letting students sign up to perform if they want."

"So we'll spend the night all dressed up watching some no talent losers make fools of themselves?" Sam asked, "Been there…done that."

"I'm actually with Sam on this Carly" Freddie face twisted into a grimace, as if agreeing with Sam made him sick to his stomach, "I don't really want to be at prom"

"But you already bought tickets didn't you?" Carly said, remembering too late exactly why he'd bought tickets; who he'd bought them for. "Sorry…"

Freddie thought about it. This day had been terrible, and it just started. Everything felt off, nothing felt normal and as much as he wished he could go back in time and fix whatever had broken between him and Sam, right now he just wanted to feel normal again. He just wanted to be a regular guy, hanging with his friends… not hurting. Maybe if he got back to doing normal things he could forget.

"I'll do it" he said.

Carly stared at him and Sam choked on the water she'd been drinking.

"What?" Carly said.

"I said I'll do it. Why not? " He glanced at Sam who was staring back at him, her face unreadable.

"Okay," Carly said, "So that makes the vote two to one in favor of doing iCarly live from the prom. Sorry Sam… you're outvoted" Carly walked out the door to get Principal Franklin.

"What the hell Freddie?" She said, turning to stare at him. "Do you really want to do this?"

"Sam, I'm going to say this once and then I'm done with it," he summoned his courage and looked directly into her eyes. "What you did… it killed me. Every day since then has been a nightmare. I loved you Sam…really loved you, and you just walked away. I'll never understand, but one day I hope I'll get over it. Maybe I'll even be able to forgive you. But right now, all I want it to feel normal again, and if doing this stupid show at the stupid prom will help that happen than that's what I'm going to do. And if you don't like it…well, I really don't care." He stood and grabbed his bag. "I'm done making my life revolve around what you want." He walked out the door, leaving Sam alone.

"Freddie?" She heard Carly call to him as she entered the office with Principal Franklin in tow.

"What did you do Sam? I thought I told you two to be nice? Do I have to get the mace?"

"Sorry Carly, wasn't me this time." Sam said quietly, in shock from what she'd just heard. "Look, I'll do it. I'm gonna go, you can fill me in on the details later. See ya, Ted" she waved, walking out of the office.

"I'm sorry about all that" Carly said, sitting down across from Principal Franklin's desk.

"Sam and Freddie seem a bit more…at each other's throats than usual. What's going on Carly? Anything I can help with?"

"Not unless you're Cupid with a magic wand." She sighed, "They were enemies and then friends and then they were in love but now they're not…well they are but they don't want to be…well, I think Freddie still wants to be, but Sam says they can't so now they're…" She paused, not knowing what words to use "driving me crazy!"

Principal Franklin laughed. Oh, to be young again.

"So what is your decision regarding the prom?"

"Oh… we'll do it. Just tell us what you need us to do."

"It's fairly simple really. Just walk around the prom, do you normal witty banter, talk to some of the students. Oh, and this year we're allowing a few select students to do performances…don't worry, we've listened to them beforehand…they're actually very talented! We'd give you a list of their names and you could do a little introduction and maybe interview them after. We'd give Freddie access to any of the schools A/V equipment he might need. So…what do you think?

"Sounds…good, Principal Franklin. So we'll just plan on being here early on Saturday. Is seven okay?"

"That sounds great Carly, thanks so much…you're really saving me on this one." He smiled at Carly as she stood to leave, calling to her right before she shut the door. "Oh, and Carly?"

"Yes Principal Franklin?"

"I wouldn't worry about Sam and Freddie. These things have a way of working out. Plus, maybe a little 'prom magic' will rub off on them. Those two might just have a happy ending yet."

"At this point I'll just be happy if their ending doesn't involve, blood, broken bones or a trip to the emergency room. See you later Principal Franklin." She walked toward her homeroom, feeling completely helpless.

She had no idea what to do about this. She was fresh out of idea, a rare occurrence for her. What she did know was that if something didn't happen… and soon, three months of love was going to ruin six years of friendship. And she just couldn't let that happen.

 


	12. Momentum

"Sam, come out of the dressing room!"

"I don't wanna!"

"Come on, it can't be that bad!"

"I look like a float in the Easter Parade!"

Carly tried not to laugh. She wanted to tell Sam that it couldn't be that bad, but she knew that it could and probably was that bad. They'd spent the last two hours in the mall trying, desperately and unsuccessfully to find a prom dress for Sam. And for two hours it had been a steady procession of dresses, each more awful than the last. There was a hot pink taffeta with puffed sleeves, a bright yellow chiffon complete with light-up butterflies and even a turquoise dress with a mermaid train, rhinestones  _and_ feathers. She'd and Sam had all but given up hope and Sam was threatening to show up to prom in a pair of cargo shorts and a penny tee.

"Why did you wait until the last minute to get a dress? I told you to come with me weeks ago!"

"I wasn't planning on going to prom weeks ago." Sam called from the dressing room, "And if you weren't forcing me to go to this lame-o parade I could spend my night happily watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show." She peeked her head around the door, "Why am I doing this again?"

"Because, I'm your best friend and you want to make me happy."

"Meh" Sam groaned from behind the closed door. "Seriously Carly, we've been trying on dresses forever…we aren't going to find anything."

Sam hated this. Finding some fancy froo-froo dress that she'd have to wear while spending the evening around Freddie. Pain on top of pain – and Carly expected her to be excited about it.

"Ladies..." Carly turned to see the saleswoman who'd been helping them enter the dressing room area. The poor woman. She probably worked on commission and had been forced to spend the afternoon with two teenage girls in a store full of ugly dresses, and one of the girls had been openly hostile; threatening, at one point, to put her foot where feet were never meant to go if she dared to bring in one more dress. She looked terrified. Her voice lowered to a whisper as she glanced fearfully toward Sam's dressing room.

"I know she said no more dresses… but I think I may have found the perfect one."

"I said no more dresses lady!" Sam screamed from behind the door.

The saleswoman jumped and began to walk backward toward the exit. Carly stood and walked toward her, putting her hands out in front of her trying to calm the woman who'd found herself on the wrong end of Sam's wrath.

"It's okay…don't worry. Her bark is worse than her bite."

"She bites?"

Maybe that hadn't been the right thing to say.

Carly tried not to laugh as she peered around the woman's back, where she was holding the dress.

"Are you sure she's okay?"

"She's fine" Carly glanced toward Sam's door. "Believe it or not…" she lowered her voice, "this is actually pretty mild for her."

The woman brought the dress from behind her and Carly's breath caught.

It was perfect.

"It's gorgeous! Oh my God…"

"I know!" the woman said, confidence building at Carly's excitement. "It was being held for someone else but they didn't come pick it up! And it's just her size!"

"Carly… no more dresses!"

"Sam…just one more. I think this might be 'the one'!"

Carly walked toward the dressing room door, handing the dress to Sam over the top.

She waited. One minute, two minutes, three minutes. After five full minutes of waiting with no sight or sound of Sam, she knocked lightly on the door.

"Sam? Do you have it one?" She paused and moved back as the door opened slowly.

"Holy crap!" Carly said softly. "You look…amazing!"

Sam exited the room slowly, unsure of herself. She wasn't used to this level of girly frilliness.

Carly walked up to her, leading her by the shoulders to the three-way mirror.

"Sam…look at yourself" she said, coaxing Sam, who stood with her eyes closed tight, into looking at herself, "you're beautiful!"

Midnight blue chiffon draped softly from an empire waistline, ending above her knees. A strapless sweetheart neckline littered with rhinestones contrasted against creamy white of her skin.

Sam was silent. She couldn't even think of something witty to say. She'd spent the better part of her teenage years comparing herself to Carly…to every girl really, and feeling as if she always fell short. But in this dress… well, she  _felt_  beautiful.

"Freddie is going to freak," Carly squealed into her ear.

The two girls stood together silently, smiles spreading slowly across their faces for different reasons.

'This is it' Carly thought. Prom would be a magical night, just as Principal Franklin had said. Freddie would take one look at Sam in this dress and remember that this girl loved him, regardless of what she said. And in this dress Sam would be confident and beautiful and realize that every princess deserved a prince; and that hers would be standing right in front of her.

* * *

"The things we do for girls," Brad said, grabbing, uncomfortably, at the bowtie at his neck. "Seriously… could this  _be_  more uncomfortable?"

"What do you mean… this is awesome!" Gibby exited his dressing room, joining Freddie and Brad in front of the three way mirror. "The only way it could be better is if I could wear it…without the shirt!" He posed, James Bond style, in the mirror – winking at his reflection.

Freddie laughed and it occurred to him that it had been a long time since he'd done it. It felt good.

He adjusted his jacket and tie – he'd decided against a bow tie, going instead for a regular one in a deep blue.

'Like Sam's eyes' he thought and shook his head, trying to rid himself of the thought.

This wasn't about Sam. He wasn't supposed to be considering her, thinking of her. But successfully telling himself not to think of her was about as likely as telling the sun not to rise…just wasn't going to happen.

"We look good!" Gibby said, draping his arms over Brad and Freddie's shoulders. "Look out ladies!"

Brad and Freddie laughed. Gibby's status as a 'ladies' man', even if it was in his own mind, was a never-ending source of amusement. But Freddie had to admit…they did look pretty good. They did goofy poses in the mirror, trying to outdo each other. Gibby was definitely the winner with his 'Zoolander' pose.

"Dudes…tonight is going to be epic! Just us and our ladies!" he raised his hand to high five Brad, turning to do the same to Freddie, dropping his hand at the stricken look on Freddie's face. "Man, Freddie…I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said…"

"It's cool Gib." Freddie said, trying to sound much more confident than he felt. "It's still going to be epic. I can't let what happened with…" he couldn't bring himself to say her name, "with…her, to mess up our night." He plastered a smile on his face, trying to reassure his friends. "I'm gonna go change."

He walked into the dressing room, letting the fake smile fall from his face, changing back into his jeans and shirt. Gibby was right, tonight would be epic-an epic failure. He'd be forced to spend the entire evening watching Brad, Carly, Gibby and Tasha being happy and in love while he suffered in silence. Sam would show up looking gorgeous and acting unaffected and he'd have to stand there, watching her, filming her and pretending that he didn't want to wrap his arms around her, beg her to change her mind…and come back to him. Yeah, this night was going to be "epic," alright.

He grabbed his tux and took it to the register. Thankfully he didn't need any alterations; with only 4 days until prom there wasn't much hope of that happening. He waited at the register for Gibby and Brad to meet him and they all exited the store; Gibby and Brad talking about prom preparations, him listening wistfully.

Until a few short days ago, he had been planning an amazing night for Sam. He'd managed to find a fancy sit down restaurant that served ribs – Carnivore- and he'd planned to take her there, in a limo no less. Then they'd spend the night dancing and laughing with their friends before ending the night at The O'Haloran for a midnight showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show. His mom would be working the night shift so his earnest teenage-boy hope was that the evening would end with him and Sam in a tangled heap on his bed, reveling in the feel of her in his arms. Now he only hoped they'd get through the night without killing each other.

* * *

"Now for shoes…I'm thinking…black stilettos?"

Sam looked at Carly as if she'd suddenly grown a second head. Fancy dresses were one thing but she drew the line at hooker heels!

"Nuh uh, Carls, not a chance…it's bad enough that I'm spending a perfectly good night surrounded by the idiots at our school sweating and grinding against each other in a badly decorated gym but I'm  _not_ going to do it while trying to avoid breaking my neck in three inch heels!"

"Okay, okay!" Carly threw her hands up in surrender, "No heels…but at least promise me that you won't wear high tops." She looked at Sam who was giving her a non-committal shrug. "Sam…please?"

"Alright…no tennis shoes. Geesh… this night has too many rules already! No high tops, no boxer shorts, no heckling the entertainment… what  _can_  I do?"

Carly laughed, roping an arm around Sam's shoulders as the exited the mall, waiting on the curb for Spencer to pick them up.

"You can behave yourself and look beautiful in your new princess dress."

They sat quietly on a bench outside the mall entrance, Sam slurping loudly on her Fat Shake, dunking her pretzel sticks into it.

Carly sighed, glancing sideways at Sam. She felt conflicted and only hoped it didn't show on her face. On one hand she was so excited for prom, looking forward to spending an evening with all her friends… and Brad, wrapped in his arms, dancing slowly. She looked forward to seeing the look on Brad's face when he saw her in her dress. But she felt guilty for her happiness when she considered how her best friends must be feeling. She wanted so badly for Sam and Freddie to be spending prom night together, happy – even making her sick with their PDA…but after the way they'd fought in Principal Franklin's office even she, the eternal optimist, had doubts that the night would hold anything beyond thinly veiled contempt between the two of them.

It was all so stupid. They obviously loved each other…she'd never seen Sam look at any other boy like that, like she didn't even notice that anyone else was around. Those kinds of feelings didn't just go away. And she understood, in some ways, how Sam was feeling. It was a scary thing to love someone…to give them all of you and trust that they wouldn't hurt you, or, worse yet… leave. But Sam was letting her fear take control of her mind and ruin her chance at real happiness. She was letting her fear tear her and Freddie apart.

"Sam…" Carly said softly. She had to be cautious; choose her words carefully. She needed Sam to hear her, really hear her. She couldn't afford to put her on the defense immediately. "I want to talk to you about something."

Sam put her pretzel down resolutely into her Fat Shake, turning a suspicious gaze on Carly.

"Carls, if this is about Freddie, I don't…"

"Just listen. Please?" Her eyes pleaded with Sam, who sighed and slumped back onto the bench.

"Do you know that when I first moved to Seattle you were the only person who tried to make friends with me? After…after my mom died, it seemed like everyone treated me like I was made of glass; like I'd break if they said the wrong thing. But you… you never did. You treated me like I was normal. You were there for me. And over all of these years there isn't anyone else who's been there for me the way you have. I don't think I've ever told you how much that means to me. I love you Sam."

"Carls…" Sam raised a hand to Carly's shoulder. "You know I'm not big on all that mushy stuff but… I love you too."

"I know you do. And I know that you've had some really hard things to deal with too. Your mom…your dad. I can see how all of those things have made it really hard for you to trust people, to believe that there are people who care about you, and who accept you…just like you are. I want you to be happy Sam…really happy. I want you to look at yourself and see all the amazing things  _I_  see in you. And it makes me so sad to realize that you don't; you don't see those things. You don't understand just how much you mean to the people who care about you. To me, to Spencer…and to Freddie."

"Carly…" Sam's voice cracked and she tried with all her might to hold back the tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

"Just let me finish." She turned to Sam, looking her directly in the eyes. "He loves you Sam. I think that on some level he's always loved you. And I know how hard it is for you to believe that, to believe that he's not going to do what you dad did, but Sam you have to trust me… trust Freddie. He wouldn't ever hurt you."

"You don't know that he won't," Sam said softly.

"And you don't know that he will! You're driving him away because of what  _might_  happen. You're giving up on what could be the best thing that ever happened to you, Sam!"

"I'm scared."

"I know Sam. I'm scared too. I'm scared to think that you'll spend the rest of your life scared… running from all the good things you could have. Never believing that you deserve them. But you  _do_  deserve them. You deserve to be happy." She grabbed Sam's hand, "Give him the chance to make you happy."

Sam was quiet, her shoulders shaking in silent sobs. She didn't want to hear this but the truth in Carly's words rang like a bell in her soul. Suddenly she was filled with an ache that threatened to consume her. She'd fought so hard, tried so hard to protect herself. The thought of Freddie leaving her, the idea that one day he could wake up and not love her anymore had shaken her to the core. She'd let that fear pull her away from him, she'd let it make her break his heart.

She was saved from responding to Carly by the sound of Spencer's car horn.

"Just promise me you'll think about what I said." Carly squeezed her hand as they both stood to walk to the car.

Sam knew she'd think about it. She'd likely think of nothing else.

* * *

Prom night. As much as she hadn't been looking forward to it, Sam's stomach was still filled with butterflies as she pulled her dress from the closet and started to get ready. She was supposed to meet Carly, Brad, Gibby, Tasha and Freddie at Carly's house by 6:30. The thought of seeing Freddie was nerve wracking in itself, but it wasn't the reason for her jitters.

After she'd come home from the mall with Carly she'd done just as Carly asked and really given some thought to what they'd talked about. She turned the situation over and over in her head. The longer she thought about it the more she realized just how wrong she'd been. She thought about how Freddie must have felt; left standing on a darkened fire escape, watching as she ran away. She knew what it felt like for someone you loved to leave with no explanation. To leave you wondering what you'd done to make them stop loving you. The pain she felt at his absence from her life was nothing compared to the pain of realizing what she'd done to him.

But even after that she still couldn't find a way to tell him. She'd seen him at school and while he wasn't being openly hostile anymore, his reception was chilly at best. She'd tried a million times to open her mouth and tell him how she felt, to tell him that she was sorry, that she was wrong. But every time she looked in his eyes all she saw was disappointment and her pride sealed her mouth shut.

'Maybe today'. She'd said it to herself every day, and every day she'd crawl into bed at night and fall asleep angry at herself for her stubbornness.

She walked over to her bed, sitting down lightly as she picked up a baby blue envelope from her nightstand. She hadn't had the courage to say to him all that needed to be said, so she'd try another tactic.

On her way home from school yesterday she'd passed the arcade. She thought she'd go in a play a few games, take her mind off of Freddie; try to forget what a coward she was.

Inside there'd been a 'Grab It' machine just like in Toy Story with a bunch of grubby faced little kids crowded around it, each trying to get the machine to grab something…anything. She'd watched them for a while thinking how crazy people where to spend their money on a game that no one ever won.

That's when she'd decided. If she couldn't make the decision about her and Freddie's fate, she'd leave it to a game of chance.

She'd thrown her quarters into the slot and begun to maneuver the mechanical arm. Predictably it skimmed the surface of all of the little plastic balls without picking up one. She'd been ready to give up and go home when it happened.

As the arm began to slow down, signaling the end of her turn it grasped onto a tiny clear ball in the very corner; Sam bit her lip in concentration, pulling slowing on the handle to lift it. 'This is crazy' she thought, I'm getting all excited about a stupid plastic ball filled with some cheap toy made in Taiwan. But the thought didn't keep her from moving the handle, carefully, diligently until the small ball dropped into the prize slot.

She scrambled to grab it before it rolled to the floor. Opening the cover she tipped the ball into her hands to grab the treasure from inside, throwing the empty ball over her shoulder.

Lying in her hand was a small silver pendent. A winged running shoe. She'd known then what she had to do.

She opened the envelope and unfolded the white paper from inside. The pendant she'd won lay in the paper's crease. Just below it, she'd carefully written three words that she hoped would change her life:

_I'm done running_

* * *

Prom night had only been underway for an hour and already Freddie had a headache.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, squinting against the throbbing in his head as he stood in the center of the Shays' living room. All around him was chaos; Gibby was busy trying to convince Tasha that his tux would look so much better if he lost the shirt, Brad was trying to convince Carly that the shoes she was wearing, the third pair in thirty minutes, were fine and no, she didn't need to change them. His mother had been fussing over his tie, telling him to make sure it wasn't too tight or it might cut off his circulation and on top of all that Spencer was trying to find a new camera for pictures after his last one had burst into flames.

Everyone was talking at once – and loudly. Freddie thought his head might just explode and the thought was strangely comforting; at least then, he wouldn't have to go.

Carly, Brad, Gibby and Tasha had all gone to dinner together before meeting back at Carly's, an event Freddie had, thankfully, not been expected to join. They seemed to understand that right now he could only handle couples in small doses.

It was 7:15 and they were due at the school by 7:30 so they could get final instructions from Principal Franklin and start setting up for the iCarly broadcast. But they were still one person short. Sam had yet to show up.

"Where is she?" Carly frowned, grabbing Brad's arm to look at his watch. "She was supposed to be here thirty minutes ago!"

"Maybe she's not coming" Gibby offered.

Freddie could only hope. While he'd been getting ready his stomach had been in knots thinking about how he was going to make it through tonight. This week at school had been bad enough. He'd tried so hard to just act normal but every time he saw her or heard her voice he had to swallow past the lump in his throat. A few times she'd looked as if she was going to say something to him and he'd had to beat back hope; make his face like stone. Her words were like salt in an open wound…everything she said, or didn't say…hurt.

The door opened and shattered his idea of an evening without Sam. But his mind had no time to register that fact as he felt his heart stop and his breath catch in his throat.

Sam entered the room to whistles and clapping. Somewhere in the distance he heard Carly squealing and Spencer telling Sam how pretty she looked. But the longer he looked at her the farther away the voices were until there was no one in the room but him and… a blond-headed angel.

Her dress was of a deepest blue and hugged every curve, the light from the room shimmered on its surface, reflecting the blue of her eyes. Her hair, normally an untamed mass of curls, had been swept to the side and twisted into a bun at the nape of her neck, where a thin silver necklace lay, a diamond pendent resting at her chest. He'd never seen anything more beautiful.

"Hey peoples," she said, obviously uncomfortable at all the attention, "you act like you've never seen a girl in a fancy dress before" she laughed, "let's get going…I hear there's a prom going on tonight."

"Not before I get more pictures," Freddie's mother said, gathering their little group together. "All right now, everyone say 'Safety First!' They all looked at Freddie, who gave a shrug of apology for the weirdness that was his mother.

'Safety First!' they cried in unison. Sam and Freddie stood on the outer edges of the group, away from each other. He watched her as they took more pictures; she leaned against Carly and smiled into the camera. He missed that smile.

'Alright kiddos…limo's here" Spencer said.

Freddie, Brad and Gibby started grabbing the equipment they'd be taking with them as the girls led the way out the door.

"Now remember… no drinking… or rowdy behavior… or inappropriate touching!" His mother called after them as they entered the elevator.

"Mom!" he said, willing the doors to shut before she decided to come with them. He wished he had to worry about "inappropriate touching" tonight.

"I love you Freddie Be…" her words were mercifully cut off by the closing door.

"Dude… your mom is nuts!" Gibby said

"Hey!" Sam said, "it's not as if your family isn't filled with freaks and mutants!" Sam said, glancing quickly at Freddie.

They all laughed and around him the conversation continued but once again the world went silent for Freddie as one thought filled his mind.

She'd defended him. Maybe this night wouldn't be so bad after all.

* * *

"So you can set up here near the stage, that way you can talk to the performers before they go on." Principal Franklin gestured wide at the stage, keeping an eye on the gymnasium doors as large groups of prom goers began to enter.

He'd loved prom as a kid. A chance to dress up and strut your stuff. He'd even gone all out for the occasion tonight, complete with rented tux and a cheesy corsage for his wife, who he'd brought as his date.

"So do you have any questions, guys?"

Freddie looked up from his cart where he was arranging his equipment.

"So you want Carly and Sam to introduce the acts as they go on? And they're all okay with being broadcast live on the internet?"

"They've all signed consent forms and they're very excited to be a part of iCarly. I can't tell you guys how much I appreciate you doing this. Have fun!"

Carly smiled at Principal Franklin and his wife as they walked away…old people were so cute. She turned to Sam, Freddie, Gibby and Brad.

"Alright guys, we'd better get started, people are starting to arrive." She shouted to be heard over the loud music that had begun to play. Already groups of kids were dancing…some better than others, Sam pointed out.

Freddie picked up his portable camera, tossed Carly a microphone and Sam her blue remote, both of which had been rigged up to play over the gym's loudspeaker.

"In five…four…three…two…"

"Hello people of the universe! I'm Carly…"

"I'm Sam…"

"And this is a special edition of iCarly live from…"

"The Seattle zoo!" Sam pressed a button and the sounds of wild animals filled the room.

"We're _not_  at the zoo…"

"But we are surrounded by animals!"

"That's true Sam, but these animals are joining us live…."

"From the Ridgeway High School Prom!" Sam and Carly screamed in unison, joined by the shouting and cheers of the prom goers.

"Tonight we've got a great iCarly for you. We've got music" Carly gestured toward the stage, "live performances and…."

_'Random dancing'_

The gymnasium erupted as the heavy beats filled the room.

Sam, usually wild in her dancing, was decidedly more subdued. 'Good thing' Freddie thought. In that low cut dress, one false move could prove…dangerous. He watched her dancing and laughing with Carly, surrounded by rowdy students, each trying to get close enough to be on the camera. He noticed that the circle around Sam was all male…and they seemed more interested in getting close to Sam than to the camera. His first reaction was to put the camera down, walk up to those perverts and tell them to get their eyes off his girl. There was just one problem.

She wasn't his girl anymore.

The headache from earlier in the evening threatened to return.

He watched the crowd of guys staring at her – leering at her. She was oblivious to it all, whispering something into Carly's ear as they laughed and danced. She had no idea the reaction she…and that dress, were causing in the male population of Ridgeway High.

He walked closer to the girls, zooming his camera in on them, close enough now to hear the conversation of Sam's crowd of admirers.

"Damn…Puckett is looking hot tonight."

"I'd hit that…and I wouldn't even be mad if she hit back!"

Idiots. He felt himself flush with the effort to remain calm. He steadied the camera on his shoulder, following Sam and Carly as they began to walk through the crowd. He couldn't even focus on what Carly was saying, he was so tuned to the reactions of the crowd to Sam.

Sure, it was a difference. Sam never dressed up, or attended school dances, or went this long without throwing a punch or an insult. People were understandably shocked. But he couldn't help himself from being pissed off as he watched her smiling at the salivating morons, accepting compliments… gracefully even! None of the non-committal grunts and eye rolls he'd got when  _he_  told her she was beautiful. He'd noticed her before any of these yahoos in here did and yet here they were, raking their eyes over her like the last steak in a meat locker and there she was smiling like she was enjoying it!

"Freddie! What's wrong with you?"

He hadn't even noticed Carly go off camera or walk up to him. He continued to stare at Sam, his face twisted into what he knew must be a look of disgust. He tried to calm down.

"Nothing. It's just…loud in here." He hoped the lie sounded more believable than it felt.

"Freddie?"

"Seriously Carly. I'm fine…really" He smiled in an effort to ease the look of concern on her face. "Where's Brad? I thought you two would be in a dark corner somewhere by now"

"Um…" Carly looked around for him, "He went with Gibby to grab some kind of cord form the A/V room. He said you might need it to preserve the battery on your camera. She looked toward the stage, where the first performer of the evening was nervously wringing her hands as she prepared to ascend the stairs. "Crap…we gotta go."

She grabbed Sam and gestured for Freddie to follow them.

Sam's hand was currently in the hand of a tall, blond jock that Freddie recognized as Pete. Sam's first crush. And Pete's lips were attached to the back of Sam's hand as Carly pulled her in the opposite direction.

"Save a dance for me Sam" Pete called after her.

Freddie wondered how far down Pete's throat he could realistically shove his camera.

Carly and Sam ran up the steps to the stage and Sam pushed a button, filling the gym with the sound of applause.

"Tonight we've got some really great music for you, courtesy of your fellow Ridgeway students!"

"We really hope that they don't suck!"

"Sam!"

"What? I'm just saying" Sam said innocently, catching the eye of Miss Briggs who shook a threatening finger at her, "Alright Briggsy…don't get your bag pipes in a twist."

"First up we have Rachel Simonsen singing 'California Girls' by Katy Perry!"

"Give it up for Rachel!" Sam pushed the applause button as she and Carly exited the stage.

"Alright guys… we don't have another performer for thirty minutes. I'm going to find Brad." Carly glanced between Sam and Freddie, "Please try not to kill each other!" she pleaded, tossing a worried glance over her shoulder as she walked away.

Freddie walked back toward the corner of the stage to his cart, vaguely aware that Sam was following him.

"Freddie…" she started, reaching into the small black bag she'd deposited on his cart at the beginning of the night.

He ignored her. Terrified of what she might be going to say.

_I'm in love with Pete._

_We're going to run away together_

_There's never going to be a 'you and me'_

"So" he said, louder than he intended, trying to drown out his thoughts. "You and Pete were getting pretty cozy there."

She looked at him with confusion.

"We were just talking"

"Oh… and talking now involves him putting his lips all over you!"

"His lips were not all over me! They were on my hand"

"Technicality. Trust me…he wanted them on more than your hand."

He was being an ass. He was fully aware of how big an ass he was being but he couldn't stop himself.

Sam glanced around the room nervously, the envelope growing wet from her nervously sweating palms. She hadn't really figured an angry Freddie into the equation. Nonchalant, maybe but out right, red faced, screaming at her angry … nope, she hadn't planned on that.

Freddie watched her as her eyes scanned the crowd.

"Looking for someone? Don't let me stop you from your rendezvous with 'Pete'" he spat angrily.

Why was he mad? He closed his eyes and breathed slow and deep, trying to calm himself.

She hadn't done anything. He knew her well enough to know that she wasn't the type of girl to encourage the kisses of random guys. But Pete wasn't exactly random. She'd liked him once. Enough to change how she looked and acted. And even though he never would have asked her to, or expected her to, she hadn't been willing to make those kind of changes for him. So Pete could get 'soft, girly, let you kiss me in public' Sam and what did he get? He got 'love 'em and leave 'em, hide you like a dirty secret' Sam.

He was angry all over again.

"Just go Sam"

She paused and looked at him. If she walked away now, she didn't know if she'd ever have the courage to come back, to say what needed to be said. She gripped the envelope, the pendant poking into her skin. She had to make him listen.

"Freddie… I need to talk to you. About what happened."

"You need? Once again,  _you_  need! Dammit Sam is that what it's always going to be about? What you need? What you want? Did you ever think that maybe  _I_  don't  _want_ to talk to you? Maybe I'm over all this bullshit and I don't want to deal with it anymore."

As he spoke he saw the pain in her eyes. His anger and bitterness reveled in that pain; in the fact that now, he wasn't the only hurting.

"I already said it once Sam. I'm done. Do you get it? Done! With you, with us, with whatever fantasy we were living in." his eyes narrowed as he looked at her. "Please. Leave."

She flinched; his words were like acid, melting away her hope and any courage she'd had.

Without another thought she turned on her heel and ran from the gymnasium.

'What the hell have I done?' Freddie thought to himself. He started to run after her but his pride kept him rooted to the spot. He'd hurt her… on purpose, and the shame of that fact took his breath away.

He leaned over, placing his hands on his knees in an effort to catch his breath. On the floor where Sam had been standing was a small envelope. As he reached to pick it up he saw his name scrawled on the front in Sam's handwriting. He didn't want to open it. As stupid as he felt, something in him knew that whatever was in that envelope would make it worse.

But he opened it anyway, and a small piece of metal fell from inside. A tiny silver shoe with wings attached. He took a deep breath and opened the paper.

_I'm done running_

He lost, completely, his ability to breathe. What had he done?

"Freddie!" He turned his head as he saw Carly approaching, her eyes wide in confusion. "What's going on? I just saw Sam run out of here! Where's she going?  _What did you do, Freddie_?"

He couldn't stop himself, tears of frustration spilled over onto his cheeks.

"Oh my God Freddie, are you okay?" Carly who was, thankfully, alone came to stand at his side, putting a hand out to arm. "Did something happen between you and Sam?"

"God Carly… I'm such an idiot!" He slammed his fist down onto his cart, sending cables flying. "I ruined it! She… she was trying to talk to me…trying to…" regret overwhelmed him; he couldn't form words. He handed Carly the pendant and the letter.

Her face fell as she read it. She'd listened to her, Sam had listened to her. She'd taken a step toward Freddie, toward making things right. But if Freddie's face was any indication, it hadn't gone well.

"Oh Freddie, please tell me you didn't do anything stupid. Please tell me you didn't reject her."

Freddie lowered his head in shame. "I told her to leave. I didn't open the letter until after she left."

Carly folded the letter, placing it and the pendant back in their envelope. This had to end. Tonight. Sam and Freddie couldn't go on hurting each other like this.

"Listen to me…" she said sternly. Softening her voice she reached out to grab Freddie's hand. "When you liked me you never took no for an answer, never quit chasing me, never quit going after what you wanted. That was just a crush, a fantasy; what you have with Sam is real. And it's worth fighting for."

Freddie looked up at her, finally able to breathe normally.

"What do I do Carly? I really screwed things up. She'll never listen to me."

"Make her listen! Don't take no for an answer. Don't give up on her Freddie."

Freddie looked anxiously toward the gymnasium exit and then back at Carly.

"Go ahead you nub! Brad can film and I guess Gibby will have to do as a co-host…" She smiled at him, handing him the envelope. "Go get your girl."

With no further encouragement necessary Freddie ran for the exit, out the doors and onto the street.

He'd had doubts about a lot of things in the last week. But there was one thing he knew. He loved Sam.

And he was going to get her.


	13. Make You Feel My Love

Why had she let Carly talk her out of wearing her high-tops? She ran down the wet sidewalk away from Ridgeway as fast as she could. Stupid princess dress. Stupid princess shoes. She needed to run faster, harder than her dress would let her. She needed to put as much distance as possible between her and the nightmare she'd just lived through.

The thought of it brought fresh tears to her face. She gulped for air, swiping at her tears as she tried, in vain, to hold her feelings back.

'I can't break down' she thought. But she knew that she was holding herself together by a thread and very soon that thread would break and she'd be helpless to stop it.

She ran on, pulling out the pin that held her hair back, sending it flying in the wind around her face.

_ Don't you get it? I'm done! _

She chocked back a sob. She'd been ready. She'd been determined to show him tonight, to let him know just how ready she was to love him and let him love her despite the fear that filled her heart. She'd been prepared to tell him that she'd rather be scared to death with him than be without him, that nothing made sense without him – that she didn't make sense without him. But she'd never gotten that chance.

She ran until she reached Bushwell Plaza, her dress wet from the rain, her hair a mess, her make-up having long since run down her face. This was the only place she could think to go. Carly's house had always been like a sanctuary for her. Spencer would let her in and, hopefully, spare her too many questions about why she was there, soaking wet, on his doorstep instead of at the prom with Carly.

She entered the building, glad to see the lobby empty, and raced toward the elevator. She arrived on the eighth floor and dragged herself to Carly's door, knocking insistently.

No answer.

She knocked harder, calling Spencer's name.

Nothing.

She reached for her bag. She remembered then. Her bag. The envelope. She'd left them at the prom. It didn't matter she guessed. Nothing in that envelope would have changed his mind. He was over her.

That fact coupled with sadness and exhaustion crumbled her resolve and she slid down the wall beside the door, her body shaking as she sobbed. She was alone…really and truly alone.

She heard a door creak open and tried in vain to wipe her face and stop her tears as the face of Mrs. Benson appeared in the door to Freddie's apartment.

"Saman…Sam?" She opened the door wide as she took in the sight in front of her. "What happened? Are you okay? She looked up and down the hallway, crossing it to where Sam sat, bending down to touch her face.

Sam was so tired, too tired even to put up a brave front for Mrs. Benson. She wanted to just curl up in a ball where she sat and drown out the world. Fresh tears coursed down her cheeks, falling over onto Mrs. Benson's hand.

Marissa Benson had known Samantha Puckett for a long time, and in that time she'd called her quite a few things… most of them unpleasant. But tonight there was only one word for the girl sitting in front of her…broken.

"Oh, honey." She whispered, brushing the tears from Sam's face. "Come on inside. Spencer isn't home and you can't just sit out here all night." She reached for Sam's hand.

"It's…it's okay…Mrs. Benson" she tried to talk but her voice was shaky from crying, "I can just… just wait for Carly to come home…"

"Don't be ridiculous. You're coming with me. I won't take no for an answer." She grabbed Sam's hand and pulled her gently to her feet.

Sam followed Mrs. Benson across the hall and into the apartment. She hadn't been here since that night. She hated to remember it and wondered why a woman who hated her as much as Mrs. Benson was being so nice to her.

Marissa walked into the kitchen, gesturing for Sam to follow her. Sam walked behind her into the kitchen, taking a seat at the table. Opening the refrigerator Marissa grabbed a bottle of water and placed it in front of Sam. Turning back to the sink she wet a paper towel and handed it to Sam.

"Put that on the back of your neck, it'll help you calm down." She sat opposite Sam, studying the girl in front of her.

"Why are you being nice to me?" Sam asked, "I thought you hated me."

"I've never said I hate you Samantha… I mean, Sam"

"But you think my mother is a whore and I'm a delinquent who's a bad influence on your son."

Marissa was taken aback. She had said those things, and hearing them said back to her made her feel ashamed of how horrible they sounded.

"I heard you…I heard you tell Freddie those things." Sam said

"How did you…the open window. You're the one who opened the window." She sat quietly.

"Yeah, I heard you. So I know that you don't like me. And I know you don't want me with Freddie so it's probably good news for you that he hates me too…probably more than you do." She lowered her head and sighed. She wasn't going to cry. She had no more tears left.

"Sam…I'm not going to deny that I said those things. Although I will say that I'm sorry…I hadn't realized until just now how hurtful they were."

Sam stared back at her. She'd expected anger or yelling…not an apology.

"But Sam…what you heard. It's not the whole story."

"Right…that's what Freddie said. So what did I miss? Did you have a nice mother-son chat about how I don't deserve him? Or maybe you spent some time talking about my deadbeat father? Please Marissa…enlighten me!" Sam leaned over the table, hands shaking, "Forget it" she said, standing from her seat, "I'm out of here"

"Sit down!" She stopped involuntarily at the force in Marissa's voice, "Now!"

Sam sat back down in shock. No one ever talked to her like that…not without retaliation anyway.

"Now you listen to me…I know you're hurt, and I understand really I do, but I will not be spoken to like that in my own house." She softened her voice, looking across the table at Sam. "You were absolutely right, I sat in that room and I listed all the reasons why Freddie shouldn't be with you. I told him every story I could think of, gave every example that came to mind…do you know what Freddie said?"

"Yeah…nothing." Sam slumped in her seat.

"Wrong…" she leaned over the table toward Sam, "he defended you. For every reason I could give him why you weren't right for him…and there were plenty, he only had to give me one reason why you were." She paused, waiting or Sam to look at her. "Because he loves you. He stood there strong and proud and told me it didn't matter what I thought…or what anyone else thought… because he loved you…he _loves_ you." She fell into silence, finally standing from the table and leaving the room.

She returned a moment later, holding a picture frame in her hand. Sitting down at the table she pushed the frame across to Sam who picked it up gently. It was a picture of Freddie and his dad, making goofy faces at what must have been Mrs. Benson behind the camera. A Christmas tree twinkled in the background.

She traced her hand over Freddie's face, and couldn't help but smile at his impish grin. He was cute…even way back then.

"He was three in that picture. It was the year before…before we lost Jack." She stared over at the picture wistfully. He and his father were so close. When he died I thought I might lose Freddie too. He quit talking for a long time. It was like the light went out behind his eyes, and every time I looked at him I felt his pain, probably more than my own. From that day on, I made it my priority to protect him, to keep him safe and happy – to keep him from hurting.

He was…sheltered, probably more than he should have been, I'll admit that. But I was just so scared for him, scared that the next big hurt would swallow him whole. My fear made him cautious, scared to take risks, scared to do anything beyond what was expected of him. That's my fault too. And then something happened."

Sam raised her face to meet Marissa's, a question in her eyes.

"He met a girl. A wild, crazy, misbehaving girl. And he fell in love with her." She smiled across at Sam. "She terrified me! She spent every second around him finding new ways to torture him. There were days I thought for sure she'd kill him!"

Sam laughed in spite of herself.

"But she didn't. Quite the opposite actually, the harder she pushed, the stronger he got. He learned to push back, to fight back, to stand up for himself. Her strength taught him how to be strong. That girl…the one I was so afraid of… she changed him. You changed him Sam. All for the better." She paused, waiting for Sam's reaction. "After his father died fear and sadness closed him up, made him a lesser version of who he could be. I didn't think he'd ever trust anyone, open himself to anyone. The boy… the man who stood in front of me last week defending you…he wasn't scared. He wasn't closed off. He was the best version of himself. He was strong…and do you know why? Because, at its best that's what love does for us, it makes us strong."

Sam stared back at her.

"I owe my son an apology, I see that now. I was wrong, for not seeing in him what you've seen, for not allowing him to be the man he needs to be. And for standing in the way of…one of the best things that's ever happened to him…you."

Sam didn't know what to say. It was as if the planet had been thrown off course, out of orbit and had now righted itself. He loved her. Freddie loved her. Enough to tell his mother.

And she'd left him.

"Mrs. Benson…"

"Call me Marissa, please."

"Marissa…thanks for…for telling me this. But…I think it's too late. At the prom Freddie said…he said he was done. He said he was over me. He told me to leave."

"You want to know something I've learned in my years Sam?"

Sam nodded.

"As long as you're still breathing…it's never too late."

Sam looked doubtfully at her.

"I've known you for a long time Samantha, and in all that time I've never seen you back down from a challenge – or take no for an answer."

"But…"

"But nothing! Do you love my son Samantha?"

"Ye…Yes. I do"

"Do you want to be with him?"

Sam sighed.

"More than anything."

"Then wipe your face, go back out there and be the wild, crazy…wonderful girl who changed my son's life." She reached across the table and squeezed Sam's hand, "It's never too late."

Marissa stood and walked toward the living room, coming back with her purse and keys in hand.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked, confused.

"Where are _we_ going, you mean. We're going back to the prom so you can fix this mess you and my son have made…Now come on," she looked at her watch, "we've got exactly forty three minutes before the prom ends."

She crossed her arms over her chest impatiently.

"Come on young lady! Let's go!"

Sam smiled and stood to follow Marissa out of the apartment. She realized that she was feeling something she hadn't felt in a long time… hope.

They rode in silence, Marissa's nervousness obvious in the fact that she was going four miles over the speed limit.

"So…do you have a plan?" she asked, eyes straight ahead on the road.

"A plan?"

"Yes Sam… a plan. You know… what you intend to do to help my son see reason! A plan!"

She hadn't thought about it. She been so happy to know that Freddie had loved her, that he probably still loved her… she hadn't gotten any further than that.

"Freddie is like his father was, stubborn. If he's made up his mind to be over you then you're going to have to convince him otherwise. He loves you, I know he does. Now you just have to make him remember… make him feel that love.

Sam knew what she had to do.

"Marissa, can I please use your phone? I left mine at the prom."

"Who are you calling?" she said, reaching into her purse to hand Sam her phone.

"Reinforcements" Sam said smiling as someone picked up on the other end. "Ernie? It's me, Sam Puckett… Yep, Pageant Puckett…listen, I need a favor; a big one. How quickly can you get to Ridgeway High School?"

** PAGE BREAK HERE **

Freddie stood on the sidewalk outside Ridgeway, trying to plan his next move.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. What a mess he'd made. He managed to ruin the evening for everybody; letting his jealousy for Sam boil over, causing a scene, hurting Sam with his nasty comments. And then when she tried to hand him that envelope, he just lost it. He just wasn't able to deal with anything in writing at that moment. He never liked to see bad news in print. It just seemed so … permanent. Like the birthday card Sam had given him with the message "Happy Birthday. I hate you." Sam had told him she hated him hundreds of times, and Freddie managed to brush those off easily enough. But that card hurt. It didn't matter that she likely didn't even mean it; it still hurt him, and though he kept the card, he could never bring himself to open it again. He'd thought the letter that Sam wanted to give him tonight would be more of the same. He'd been so wrong.

On top of the clash with Sam, he had managed to disappoint Carly too. He felt even worse about that, since his friendship with Carly has always been less qualified than things were with Sam. She was unconditionally on his side, all the more so because she was upset in her own right with Sam's behavior over the past week. But Carly had looked past his behavior, comforted him, and told him to find Sam and put things right with her. At least if it were possible at this point.

He had no idea where Sam might have gone. He doubted she had any desire to see him. She knew that he was aware of most of her hiding places, so she was unlikely to show up at any of them. Carly was still at the prom, so he guessed she wouldn't have gone to Bushwell. For lack of other options, he decided to see if she went home, since it was within walking distance of Ridgeway and the prom.

It only took a few minutes, even in relatively new and stiff dress shoes, to reach the Puckett house. Over the years, he hadn't been there much, but over the past four months, he had come to know it well, and it was the scene of what had now become bitter memories of something he treasured but had let slip away from him. He took a deep breath and stepped up to the front door, ringing the bell. After a few seconds, he heard movement, together with what must have been Frothy's screeching, and the door opened, revealing Sam's mother in what for her was a conservative pink robe.

Before he and Sam had started spending large amounts of time together alone this year, he hadn't spent much time talking to Pam Puckett. The only time she paid him any attention was when she wanted a favor, like a discount at the Pear Store. Even while she was with Sam, they didn't speak much, though he often noticed Pam staring at him. He didn't let himself think why she might be doing that.

But at least she recognized him. "Well good evening garcon…you can take my order anytime," she said, opening the door to stare down at him. "What brings you by?"

Pam Puckett made him nervous. She stood leaning on the doorjamb, her eyes raking over him.

"Um…I'm trying to find Sam. Is she here?"

"What do you mean? I thought she was with you and that skinny friend of hers. What happened…?" Pam eyed him suspiciously.

"Well, uh, we were, but Sam and I had a little argument, and she left on her own. I was hoping to find her here so I could talk to her," he replied, turning to leave. "I'm sorry I've bothered you."

"Not so fast lover boy," She called after him, beckoning him to come inside. He followed behind her, trying not to notice exactly how short her robe was…leaving little to the imagination.

Freddie stepped into the living room. It felt surreal being there right then, here at the scene of what he thought was the most important moment of his life, when he went down on his knees before Sam the afternoon after she kissed him at the lock-in and confessed his feelings. Pam sat in the very spot where Sam had been, and Freddie fought to shake off the image of Sam breaking out in tears and sinking into his lap before the couch.

Pam offered to take Freddie's tuxedo jacket, and Freddie was happy to remove it. The spring evening was mild, and he was warm from the exertion of walking. As he handed Pam the jacket, he couldn't help but notice Pam briefly gripping his bicep, and giving it a small squeeze, a slight smile on her face.

"You know, I wondered what Sammy saw in you. You're a little…mild by Puckett standards" she squeezed his bicep again, "But now I see why she likes to drag you off to the bedroom whenever you're over here. You've been hiding heavy artillery under those polo shirts."

Sam was right—her mother would flirt with any man she met, even her daughter's boyfriend. Ex-boyfriend, he sighed to himself.

Freddie really started to squirm. "Mrs. Puckett, Sam and I just spend time together. We've never done _that_ kind of thing in there. I wouldn't ever use Sam like that…"

Pam interrupted him. "Call me Pam, and I know you haven't been doing anything, at least not recently, because it's been a while since I've seen you over here. And since you haven't been here, Samantha has either locked herself in her room or sat on this couch and cried her eyes out. And now you show up looking like you were just kicked in the gut. Tell me what happened. Who cheated on who?"

Freddie took his seat in the recliner opposite Pam, and stared at the floor. He had no idea what to say to Pam. He was nervous, drumming his fingers on his knees. Pam fell onto the sofa, stretching out her legs and crossing them at the ankle.

"Look Freddie…I'm sure you know that my daughter and I don't have the healthiest of relationships. But it doesn't mean I don't care or that I don't notice when something's wrong with her." She moved her feet from the sofa onto the floor, leaning toward Freddie. "Now, Sam's been walking around here for the last week like someone shot her dog. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you? She eyed him suspiciously and he shrank under her gaze. She was staring at him, but it was different this time. He used to her looking him up and down, from head to toe, but this time she was looking him in the eye, something she never did.

Freddie sighed again. "Mrs. Puck…Pam, no one cheated on anyone. We broke up a week ago. I mean, Sam broke up with me… and I still don't know why."

"Sam broke up with you? Well I'll be damned, that girl is more like me than she'll ever admit. Did she say why?"

"She kept saying that I was going to leave her, that sooner or later I was going to decide that she was no good for me. And she said these awful things about herself and, I'm sorry, her family. She kept saying she'd cause me nothing but trouble, that we're too different to work." He hung his head.

"Freddie, I wish I could give you some motherly advice about my daughter, but the truth is, you probably know her better than me. I haven't had the best relationships with my daughters. Melanie left and avoids coming back. I can tell. Samantha … sometimes she pulls away from me into a shell, and there's nothing I can do to bring her out of it. I don't really know what goes on inside her head. She never talks about it. Puckett's aren't exactly big on talking…we're more…action sort of women." Even in a serious moment, she couldn't resist the opportunity, no matter how inappropriate, to flirt. "But I still care about her. Samantha…she's really all I have left, and I don't like to see her in pain. When you were always coming around, I could tell she was happy. She _smiled_ … even around me. Then this last week, she's been in her own little hell. I know that kind of pain, and I never wanted her to have to feel it."

Freddie sat quietly, a look of shock on his face. He had thought Sam was angry with him, not hurting even worse than he was.

"I guess I don't really understand her, either. She overheard a conversation between my mom and me and she misunderstood. She thought I didn't love her, and tonight I said some things I shouldn't have and ... well she probably thinks it even more now."

"Did I hear you say she thought you were going to leave her?"

"Yes, she said it over and over, no matter how many times I told her I wouldn't. I wouldn't ever leave her."

"When you would be here with her, I heard you call her 'Princess' a lot. Could I ask you why?"

"Oh, it was an old nickname, actually from the time we didn't, um, get along so well. I'd call her 'Princess Puckett' when she'd complain about something. Then, when we were together, I just started calling her 'Princess.' I guess I wanted to have a nickname for her. You know, one that only I called her."

"I see," Pam said. "You weren't the first one call her that you know. Brian always called her his Princess. At least while he was still here. Lord, did she love that man."

"Brian?"

"My ex-husband. Sam's father. We split when the girls were five. He left suddenly, but even before then things were never good. I was eighteen when I got pregnant, and we got married in a rush. He wanted to do the right thing, and I was so scared I just wanted someone to be there. But we weren't right together, and Brian was overwhelmed, especially when he learned I was having twins. We didn't have much money, and that just made everything worse. Sam and Mellie saw way more hate than they did love. But Brian loved his daughters, especially Samantha. He couldn't buy her things, but he spent lots of time with her. We were all devastated when he left us, but Samantha took it the hardest. She was never the same once he was gone."

"I never knew. Sam never says a word about her father. We'd try to ask her sometimes, but she'd always say she didn't know anything, crack a joke or change the subject. The most she ever told us was that he left. I never even knew his name. So you don't hear from him? Does he communicate with Sam?"

"No. I haven't heard a word from Brian since about two years after he left. I couldn't even tell you where he is now. But the first time I heard you call Sam 'Princess,' it brought back memories of Brian calling her that. I was surprised she even let you use the word. She still won't let anyone call her Samantha—that's what Brian called her."

Freddie again sat quietly. He thought back to his psychology class at school, and the passage in the textbook that summarized the literature about relationships between fathers and daughters. He remembered it saying that psychologists believed that girls who grew up without fathers struggled in forming relationships with men. Sam didn't just grow up without her father—she was _abandoned_ by her father…without warning. And Pam said she was never the same after he left. Was this it? Was this what made Sam what she was? Why she could be closer than a sister to Carly; trust her with her life but always hold Freddie at arm's length, pushing him away every time he tried to end the game of "I hate you" and be a real friend to her? Why she never really seemed to trust him?

His breathing quickened, and he wanted to talk to Sam more than ever. He thought back to the night after the lock-in, when he lay on his bed and replayed his entire relationship with Sam in light of the feelings she had confessed through her double-lipped dance on his face. He was having a similar moment, realizing just how hurtful certain things he had said to her must have been, and how trapped she had to feel when he was pressing her to make their relationship public.

"Pam, I don't mean to be rude, but I need to find Sam. Now. I need to talk to her. I love her. I have never felt for anyone else what I feel for her. I need to put things right with her." He stood, accepting his jacket back from Pam. She walked him to the door and he turned to her before leaving. "Thank you for telling me this. I don't want to hurt her, but I can see now that that's what I was doing. I want her to trust me. I want that more than anything else."

"Well look at that… biceps _and_ brains." She laughed, her blue eyes – Sam's eyes – twinkling, and for a split second Freddie could see what she must have been like before she'd let the bitterness of being abandoned change her.

He waved at Pam and began running down the sidewalk, towards Ridgeway.

Pam stood in the doorway, watching him leave. He seemed like a good guy, a cut above someone like Brian. He hadn't said a selfish thing, or a word about his own feelings. He only thought about how his actions affected Samantha.

She thought to herself that maybe this Freddie could fix things; help heal the hurt in Sam that Pam had felt too inadequate to address. She turned back toward the house.

She silently wished the kid luck. 'It'd be a shame for Sam to miss out on getting a piece of those sculpted arms', she chuckled to herself. Puckett women loved that sort of thing. Her Sammy just didn't know it yet.

** PAGE BREAK HERE **

"And that was Myra Whitehouse singing, 'Memories'… in pig latin".

Carly pressed the applause button, trying to encourage the crowd to clap along. The raucous round of 'boos' caused poor Myra to burst into tears and run from the stage.

Carly signaled Brad to place the camera on the tripod sitting near the stage, where the iCarly viewers could get a good view of the room and Carly could take a break from hosting.

She was exhausted. Since Sam, and then Freddie, had left she'd be running around trying to do the biggest show they'd ever done…virtually alone. Brad was a lifesaver; she'd given him many 'thank you' kisses to drive the point home. He manned the camera and helped keep her sane when the performers, who she'd been told were all talented, turned out to be an even bigger batch of losers than Sam had predicted.

So far she'd introduced Gilbert and his jazz tuba, a group of freshman girls who'd gotten so nervous that one had thrown up on Gibby's shoes at the side of the stage before the performance even started, and the rest of them had spent the entire song giggling into their microphones and trying to hide behind each other. Thirty minutes. She only had to get through another thirty minutes.

Her phone beeped and she saw an incoming text from Freddie.

_ Freddie: She wasn't at her house _

_ Carly: You went 2 her house? Ur brave! _

"Carly, it's almost time for the next act" Gibby called out to her, still wiping at his shoes.

She turned to walk toward the stage when she saw a flash of blond hair at her side. Sam moved to stand in front of Carly, her dress slightly rumpled and her once elegant bun falling now in loose waves down her back. But Carly hardly noticed, what she noticed was that Sam…was smiling.

"Sam! Where have you been?"

"I was…with Freddie's mom."

"What!"

"I can't explain it right now." She raised her hand to stop Carly from saying anything else, "I promise I'll tell you all about it later, but right now I have something important to do…and I need your help."

It was then that Carly noticed someone standing behind Sam.

"Ernie? Sam…what is Ernie doing here?"

"Hey Carly. Nice to see you again."

Carly was confused. Sam, who only hours ago ran into the night in tears, was now standing in front of her all smiles beside her Pageant Talent coach, who had a keyboard bag strapped over his shoulder.

"Sam, what's going on?"

"Where's Freddie?" Sam asked.

"He went looking for you! He went to your house!"

"With my mom? Oh my god! Where is he now?"

"He just texted me to say he's on his way."

"Okay. Ernie…go ahead and get set up." Ernie saluted Sam and headed for the stage. "Carly, listen, you were right. You were so right and I was so completely wrong. I love him Carly…and I need him to know that. Will you help me?"

Carly was too happy to even consider saying no to one of Sam's schemes.

"What do you need me to do?"

"Text Freddie and tell him to get here…now. Then get up on stage…and introduce me" she eyed Carly hopefully.

"Introduce you? As in…you're going to perform? Here? Tonight? Sam…I don't know about this."

"Carly, you have to trust me. Please…"

Carly sighed… this was either going to end very well…or very, very badly. Either way, she'd been by Sam's side since the day they met… or she wasn't about to stop now.

"Alright Sam, you've got ten minutes…then you're on"

Sam reached up to hug Carly, squeezing hard.

"Thanks kid…for everything" she ran off toward the stage, talking to Ernie while glancing frequently at the door.

Looking for Freddie no doubt, Carly thought.

Freddie! She was supposed to text him.

_ Carly: You have to get here…now! _

_ Freddie: What's wrong? Is Sam there? _

_ Carly: Quit asking questions and get your butt here Freddie! _

_ Freddie: I'm on my way…five minutes _

Carly turned toward the stage, her stomach in knots. She wondered what Sam had planned. She hadn't had a chance to tell her how proud of her she was. The letter Sam had written must have taken so much courage. And even after Freddie had rejected her, she'd still found the strength to come back…to try again. She was the bravest person Carly knew, and she only hoped that whatever Sam had planned would work; that Sam and Freddie would find the happiness she so desperately wanted for them.

_ Carly: Where r u! _

_ Freddie: Almost there… _

"Carly…it's time" Brad called to her and she felt her stomach do a somersault.

Here went …. Everything.

** PAGE BREAK HERE **

Sam's palms were sweating. Her throat was tight and she was suddenly aware of what a mess she must look like. She paced back and forth at the side of the stage, listening as Ernie quietly practiced.

This was crazy. Completely, totally crazy.

She turned to walk from the stage, running directly into Carly who was coming on stage to introduce her.

"Okay Sam, are you ready?"

Sam took a deep breath. She was scared out of her mind. In under a minute she would take a step toward Freddie bigger than she'd imagined possible. She was shaking like a leaf.

_ At its best, that's what love does… it makes us strong. _

_ He loves me. Freddie loves me. _

Just thinking of it steadied her. The fear was still there, gnawing at her, but in the midst of that fear was the truth… Freddie loved her, and for that she was willing to stare down her fear.

"As ready as I'll ever be…" she looked over to Ernie, "let's do this!"

Carly moved to the center of the stage. Brad cued the applause and she smiled out at the crowd.

"Alright… it's time for our final act of the night..."

Sam looked once again toward the door, searching for a familiar set of dark brown eyes. He wasn't here.

** PAGE BREAK **

Freddie ran harder than he ever had. Sam was at school. He still had a chance. And he wasn't going to blow it this time. He didn't care if he had to write it in the sky, tattoo it on his back, or hold her down and tell her a million times until she believed it…he loved her. And he'd make her see it, if it was the last thing he did.

He ran up the steps of the high school, groaning in frustration as he saw the doors had been locked from the inside. He had to get in there!

** PAGE BREAK **

"This act is an extra special treat… and one I'm sure will surprise you all!"

** PAGE BREAK **

Freddie ran to the back of the school, trying the doors to the A/V room. Locked! He sat down on the stairs in frustration, before pulling out his phone.

"Ladies and gentleman, dudes and dudettes, it's my pleasure to present…"

** PAGE BREAK **

Freddie ran up the stairs, standing impatiently at the rusted door, watching as it slowly opened.

"Dude! Where have you been? Hurry up, get in there!"

"Thanks Gibby, I owe you man" Freddie said breathlessly, running at top speed through the door, leading to the stage.

** PAGE BREAK **

"Sam Puckett!" Carly cued the applause and smiled as Sam took the stage.

Carly caught Freddie's eyes as she exited the stage, running to hug him.

"You made it"

"Yeah… what's going on Carly?"

"Watch and see. I think this is going to be good."

It had better be.

"Hey Ridgeway. I'm Sam Puckett." She fanned down the applause, holding the microphone stand with both hands as if to steady herself, "I know that most of you are going to rag on me for this Monday… but you should all remember" she threatened, "I hit…hard", laughter drifted throughout the crowd.

"This is Ernie my keys player" she gestured toward Ernie who waved at the crowd, "and this song is called 'Make you Feel My Love'. It's dedicated to someone who's… very special to me. I haven't done a very good job of letting him know just how special. Because I was scared. Scared of what people thought. Scared to trust…that he loved me." She took a deep breath and looked out into the crowd. "But I'm not scared anymore."

Carly reached down and grabbed Freddie's hand, giving it a squeeze.

"So… Freddie Benson, this song is for you. I love you… and I hope it's not too late." The crowd erupted in screams, whistles and applause as the opening strains of the song began.

_ When the rain is blowing in your face. _

_ And the whole world is on your case. _

_ I could offer you a warm embrace. _

_ To make you feel my love. _

Her voice drifted softly over the crowd, beautiful and strong. She swayed softly, eyes closed, in her own world. He wanted to join her there.

_ When the evening shadows and the stars appear. _

_ And there is no one there to dry your tears. _

_ I could hold you for a million years. _

_ To make you feel my love. _

He felt weak as the full force of his love for her overtook him.

_ I know you haven't made your mind up yet. _

_ But I would never do you wrong. _

_ I've known it from the moment that we met. _

_ No doubt in my mind where you belong. _

_ I'd go hungry I'd go black and blue. _

_ I'd go crawling down the avenue. _

_ No there's nothing that I wouldn't do. _

_ To make you feel my love. _

She opened her eyes as the melody filled the room. The beauty in her voice was eclipsed by the courage of her action – willing them all to silence.

_ The storms are raging on the rolling sea, and on the highway of regret. _

_ The winds of change are blowing wild and free… you ain't seen nothing like me yet. _

She glanced toward the side of the stage expecting to see Carly, feeling her heart soar at the site of him. He was here. Freddie was here.

She smiled, grabbed the microphone from its stand and started walking toward him. His body pulled to her like a magnet. All he wanted to do was hold her…and never let her go.

He reached her mid-stage, and saw the tears shining in her eyes, eyes that looked at him…for the first time, without fear.

She raised her hand to touch his cheek softly, and he covered hers with his own, pulling it down to meet his lips.

_ I could make you happy; make your dreams come true. _

_ Nothing that I wouldn't do. _

_ Go to the ends of the earth for you. _

_ To make you feel my love. _

_ To make you feel my love. _

As her final note echoed throughout the room, Freddie reached out for her, wrapping his arm around her waist, drawing her to his chest. She smiled up at him, allowing herself to melt into his embrace.

There, in the middle of a room full of people, there was no one but them. He looked down into her eyes and found the fullness of his heart prevented him from speaking… there were no words.

"How's that for mushy in public." Sam said softly in to his ear, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I think I can do you one better." Freddie said, cupping her chin in his hand, leaning down to meet his lips with hers.

Without hesitation she leaned into him, forgetting where she was, forgetting who might see…not caring about anything but Freddie and this moment. Tangling her fingers in his hair she deepened the kiss, both of them oblivious to the ear shattering applause surrounding them.

Tonight, she'd made a choice. A choice she hoped she'd get to make every day for the rest of her life.

She'd chosen to believe in happy endings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _________________________________________________________________________  
> A/N:  
> Wow! I almost shed a couple of tears writing that one. I hope that you enjoyed it and for those of you who allowed me to put you through angsty agony, I hope it made up for it a little.
> 
> Thank you so much for following the story, for reviewing, for telling your friends about it. I am eternally grateful. This was my first fanfiction and I'm so pleased with the reaction to it.
> 
> So here is your special treat… there is going to be a sequel…and that sequel will have a sequel! So you aren't getting rid of me anytime soon.
> 
> Keeping checking my profile, the second part of the trilogy will begin soon along with some lovely, fun, non-angsty one/two/three shots. My amazing beta has agreed to co-write the next set of stories with me so I think you are going to be pleased.
> 
> Now that the story is over I would really love to have you stop for a minute and review. Tell me what you loved, what you hated, what you'd like to see more or less of. Ideas you'd like to see me try (I'm up for a challenge…always). I would really like to hear from you.
> 
> Thanks again…  
> XXOO – TheWrtrInMe


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